Open letter to the powers-that-be
To a God, a king, a head of state
A captain of industry
To the movers and the shakers -
Can’t everybody see? . . ."
- Rush/"Second Nature"
Introduction to the Playlist: A Preface . . .
Prologue:
Who are we? And how do we live with our differences . . .
– George Washington
I was working on another series of playlist musics when the 4th of July was coming up (2016), and the original 1st playlist/essay to be featured took a bit more time.
So its on this day I have a lot of concerns about America (2016-17, and now in 2018), and how it seems to have become a much angrier nation, so I thought I'd finish this one, and maybe get pelted with rocks and garbage from every side :P. I don't party and I don't belong to one.
If you wish as you read, you can listen to the Soundtrack for this essay HERE.
Warning right off the bat, this gets VERY "verbose" . . .
I have a bad (?) habit of explaining things in detail, but it is with hope people know exactly where I am coming from, from a personal point of view. So I hope you remember this as you read on to my rant, a long rant.
Forgive me of my colourful language at times, but sometimes it is required to get a point across. But something I repeat about often, is a document on which this country was founded. It was a very different world, throughout our history, especially leading up to when this document was written, but its core principles were to insure that EVERY person living in the United States of America within all the laws and the Bill of Rights that "bind us" should and will live through its standards as a beacon for all who live, work and die to uphold its sovereign words which protect each individual, OUR way of life, what WE believe in, their property (and that a "human being" is NOT property, but a free thinking individual with rights) and prosperity. WE the People are in a much different world, but many of us, as well as our parents and grandparents have lived in a time of freedom that those before could only dream of. Some are still here that have seen the changes, but others need to put themselves in a frame of mind before the 1970's, 60's, 50's and 40's. Do not take for granted the sacrifice, the struggle, the fight and triumphs of ALL those that upheld our sacred document- this noble and enduring symbol of OUR Republic; The Constitution (and the Bill of Rights). But I've seen those who don't believe in these sacred documents, as if to make it sound like we live in the most tyrannical government (for the past 30+ years) in the world. But I decline that precept, in the most logical and strongest opinion of common sense.
I am not a person who lives in a remote area away from others, who thinks that the nation should follow an
ideology that is selfish, that would only represent ME because I don't have to deal with people's opinions, their own thinking or not having to socialize with anyone. Most of my life has been around many other people, complete strangers; in the suburbs of Southern California, the metropolitan cities, and beach communities, the barrios, remote areas of the mountains, desert communities, of agriculture, farms and livestock, and in people's homes on my job. Up close and personal with people on public transportation, walking the streets. I have lived among the homeless (that is, being homeless), yet kept my sanity and distance, to not let myself become hopeless, but to do what I had to do to stay alive and focus to get back on my feet. I was once idealistic and saw almost everyone and everything with rose colored glasses, even after struggling without a home. But when you are witnessed to a person go from laughter and smiles, to a man who gave up to hope and prosper, to take courage in both hands and fight to live, to going back to drugs and booze and becoming emaciated and driven mad, once it was easy to "give" to the homeless, and the reality of those that have lost their minds are tainted from first hand experience of what a normal human being can do to threaten your home and others, and make your world crumble, and lose empathy for fear, self-pity and bitterness. You want to rage at the world for being cruel to you and "them" (mostly me, I'll concede to that. Self-pity is a powerful thing).
You can do what you can for them, but in the end its up to us to pick ourselves off the ground, find our sanity, and live. But some bite the hand that feeds, and burn every bridge that tried to help.
Reality is hard and objectivity goes out the window, and the precept of "pearls before swine" is harsh. But as we ALL judge, process and "profile" others, as we are human, trying to keep ourselves safe in every step and around every corner, I learned being so close to people everyday in my adult life that people can be kind and cruel. I came to trust in my intuition; "I can tell a person's personality from 100 hundred yards", and I'm 97% correct in my assessments. But I am open to anyone that wants to reveal their goodness and have a conversation, there is still that 3% where I can be wrong. But it keeps me safe, keeps my senses keen.
"Trying to hold some faith, in the goodness of humanity".
I've lived with the lessons and became aware that each of us have our flaws, and our "cultures" and how we are raised, our morals, ethics and values differ. Sometimes our heritage and cultures are what they are. Its inherent, for good or bad, its what we are, and we need to realize that its something we need to work on, accept and yet find common ground to co-exist as best we can. We share these cultures with all around us, but we are all judged by how WE interact with each other. It's like using all your faculties, all your senses to judge if the person coming toward you, or talking to you, is to be trusted, if they are friendly, genuine, or trying to fool you or a danger, if they feel creepy, if they are sad or troubled, holding back or lieing. We do this "everyday" (I've seen people cross the street when I'm walking toward them), we take it for what it is, as long as we see each other as people when we are able, and judge by the "content of their character". WE
need to know "who we are", deep down inside. So whatever others say, it doesn't matter, we know, and our friends, family know who we really are. And sometimes we don't even have that, so we must rely on our
self-esteem, self-worth, and if we are truly personable and approachable, we hope to be "good people".
Yes, we are all "different", all of us. We are not of a "hive", but what makes us different, also makes us interesting. How boring and useless it would be to be the same and of the same mind. HOW do WE come to an understanding that our behaviors are just a part of us, yet we can be tolerant of another way of thinking and live with it? Not be adverse or take it as an insult that we are judged by our background, but that OUR "background" is our culture, it is what we are, for better, for worse, its in our blood.
If we keep making excuses for our cultures, our race, our creed, our ideologies, WE will NEVER accept anyone else other than be selfish, living in the past, and living to blame cultures that have drastically changed from where WE are in the here and now.
We need to give up the ghosts. We need to throw away the idea of everyone thinking alike, judging a group as "the whole", but remember that each of us is an individual with various thoughts and ideas, but that WE all can come together and share these thoughts. We don't have to agree, or feel threatened, or think our "perceptions" are the reality. These are the things that make us "Free", and why many fought for it all. THIS is what the Declaration of Independence is all about. Free thinking, freewill, you can choose to be and think what you want, but it protects not only YOU, but the other person who does NOT agree with you. But each has no power to take away what you believe is the right way to live or think. This is a freedom, that I have seen, that is unique to this nation in today's world. I'm not talking about 50, 75 or 100+ years ago . . . now.
The Mirror has many faces . . .
We have much to fix, we always will, but I believe there is not 1 person in this nation that can NOT be what they want to be, and have the opportunities to work toward it. I am still a work in progress, I have not reached my own full potential or living the dream as of 5/22/18, but I'll be damned if I just give up without a fight. No one will prevent me from fighting forward of what I want to be, except myself.
With all you will read of my life, what I lived through, and those that doubted me, pushed me down, pushed me away and gave up on me. If I can get off the ground bruised and beaten, so can YOU. With your own story, not the "story" that others try to sell you, with the rhetoric, living in the past, trying to tell you that its someone elses fault, someone else's "privilege" is the reasons you can't be who you want to be.
YOU have no one to blame except the person staring you down in the mirror. No one has claim on you, no one owes you NOTHING, you are not expected to win or fail by anyone except yourself. There is no villain that will keep you down unless you LET them win! You are not entitled to anything, nothing is free or given without what YOU make of your life with your own hands, thoughts, ideas and how you cope, live with and how you conduct yourselves with others. We are ALL fallible and flawed, and man, life is tough and many times it sucks. But we get up, dust ourselves off, take all the punches, the blows, the obstacles, the abuse, the harsh, crude words, extraneous circumstances and keep fighting, and we never give up or give in. If THEY can take it, so can YOU.
I have lived through 4 administrations in my conscious adult life, yet NONE of them affected my life, that
is, directly where I can lay blame to something they've done to me to prevent me from pursuing my dreams, goals, ambitions. I have chosen a career and path that is deterred by other things, not politics, but possibly social issues such as ageism, or quotas of minorities (yet I am, so-called, one of them). But what I can blame or give reasoning why I am where I am at the moment . . . is me. I made bad choices, wrong choices, luck of the draw, or made paths to the wrong destination. I deal with things many people don't,
that drive me to the brink, with anger, bitterness and frustration. Most forget about, or take for granted the freedoms and annoyances they don't have to deal with, because of their drive and self-dependence. People everyday that work hard, pay their dues, to provide for family and make the sacrifices to make sure their families and children live safely. With hopes those values reflect in their hearts and personalities. But I look in the mirror everyday and wonder if I'll see success, live the life I want to live and be as hard working and responsible as my Father and Mother. But its all in my hands, no excuses or blame to extraneous circumstances or specific people . . .
Though It's hard to imagine I will be able to afford a home, in the county/city of my choosing because of the cost of living and ridiculous prices for purchasing a home, or leasing, even apartment rentals, in safe metropolitan and suburban cities. California has become ridiculous and I don't see any other state I would want to live. And it seems other states don't want us because they don't want the policies that many others have voted for since 1988, infecting their states and way of life. And I don't blame them. I have no idea if we can change the current road we are taking to an "Elysium" way of life for the poor and middle-class. The multi-million dollar celebs and elites have other agendas and narratives to fill that will destroy ALL of us in the land of sunshine, entrepreneurship and creativity. Rules, regulations, PC culture, divisiveness, separation of race and class, and biased rhetoric will be our downfall. But even with those that try to deter us, its a testament to YOU that you live, work and strive to live the life you do, are able to afford a home and do the best you can for your families . . . YOU are what the American Spirit is all about :). For most of us, we live and respect everyone around us, and are a part of everyday life.
But somehow, we will find success, and you live in a nation where you can do this. You CAN have ambitions, You can have success, You can change your world, but be sure to fix "yourself" first before changing the rest of the world and/or other people's lives. Live and experience life, and experience how others live it before judging and perceiving how its lived (or if you can't travel to other states, other countries, have the simple logic and understanding how people live and what they have and don't have to live, and they may have limited options in having a better life). Walk a mile or 2 in THEIR shoes and see what the realities are, or even find out that maybe they also need to get out of their comfort zone, their box, their city, and see the bigger picture. And discover something new, and from within their own minds.
But please, realize that yes, there are soo many things to fix, but believing in perfection, means that each
and everyone of us has to be without flaws, is unrealistic. WE cannot change things overnight and its a
process, a hard and arduous task, even for ourselves as individuals. We need to fix ourselves before we
demand others to do so. Look in the mirror, it will be an analogy that I use often.
Our pursuit of our own happiness . . .
WE all need to keep reminding ourselves, that how we may think, and what WE believe, may not be the way for others to live, the neighbor down the street, or those you know, or don't know. We can not force others to live the way we want, but WE can be open to discussion, even criticism. That's what Free Speech is about, even if you say something stupid, even if you're offended, you learn from your mistakes, see another point of view, and learn to agree to disagree. Or think rationally, ponder new ideas and then come to your own conclusions if its right for YOU, not the whole, without violence or intimidation. But ALL of it is protected under the principles of OUR Constitution. For OUR inalienable Rights. For life, liberty and the pursuit of our own happiness, our way of life, as an individual. We are all afforded rights, safety and opportunity to live the best we can, but its what we make of it, and how we protect each other on giving the right to everyone to their freedoms to think as they see fit to live, within the parameters of our sacred document that protects the core principles of living within this nation. WE need to protect it, every amendment and philosophy behind it, so that we all have the freedoms to choose how we live and share our lives with, and among, one another.
. . . As freedom is never free, and it is up to each and every one of us to protect it, as those that have before.
I don't need to be forgiven . . ."
- The Who/"Baba O'Riley"
A Playlist introduction:
These playlists came about 1st with Cassette Tapes I used to make in my mid-20's. I had bought an above average Cassette player that had various extra controls to enhance and edit, as well as a small Radio Shack Mixer that I ran through my cheapy "Soundesign" receiver, eventually plugged-in VCR's, Walkmans (Tapes then CD's), other tape decks, 1 or 2 Turntables and later a Laser Disc Player (after I bought a
Yamaha Receiver in the 90's), to mix into the music and gaps in-between tracks; sound FX and dialogue to enhance a "Theme", which I called "Concept Tapes". It was basically a way to make listening to the music
even more interesting. I would have Tapes, LP's, CD's strewn across the floor. I wish I had someone take a
picture because it was a sight to behold all the albums and cuts I had in mind that were literally laying on top of me. I also created my own sounds with a Mic, and Guitar FX pedals. I'd find a strange sound and
manipulate it (sine waves, odd electronic noises, guitar sounds) or my imitations of various sounds on the mic and manipulate them. It was a lot of fun but sometimes a hair pulling experience (I was also able to edit into songs at precise moments if I screwed something up, with no clicks seamlessly, but what a pain in the butt!).
Because the ideas and sounds I wanted had to be precise in timing, I wrote "scripts" for every track and
sound effect, as well as the timing of tracks and when to add a sound effect at a key moment, if it was an instrument or lyric that was my cue. I also have a extensive Sound Effects collection on LP and CD so I'd
use them as is or manipulate their sounds, sometimes backwards to get a new sound.
My last Cassette series was a 5 part (each 120 minutes) Requiem to "9/11", which took 2 years to complete with dialogue from various TV reports that I taped on VHS. I still have them, but lost many cassettes of sound fx, and VHS tapes filled with 9/11 News reports and expose's that I can't even find on YOUtube (as
well as music videos, various late night shows and more) from a Storage Unit I could no longer afford (along with Metal/Prog memorabilia, magazines, posters and beloved Tour Programs).
When I got my 1st Computer, an iMAC-G4, I started to make CD compilations of Progressive Rock & Metal, and a few Metal comps that I called "EPIC prOportions". Though I was unable to mix-in sound fx, I would find various things to put between tracks. I continued the "themed" ideas until my CD burner burned out, which was about 5 years ago. I would listen to those 50+ CD's over and over throughout the years.
When I had to move and put my music collections in storage, I wanted to hear my music, so I went to
YOUtube and found most of the music I enjoyed, and more were all there. But then I discovered I could make Playlists! So with the same principles of the CD's I'd create, I made my 1st Themed Playlists. I think I have over 50 now and working on 5 others (most with 200+ tracks for each theme!).
So this is a new way to feature these playlists as a "package", with an "Art Layout" and to provide Lyrics
linked to each song title (this one will take time, so you may not see them till NEXT 4th 2017 :p). It's a lot
of work but gives me another outlet to write and be creative.
This particular playlist has been growing slowly for the past 2-3 years, and I'm sure I'll add more.
Archive: This essay was my 1st in conjunction with a Themed Playlist, as sort of its "package/layout".
as everyone has with their own unique perspective or perception.
I do wish that you enjoy the musics, and their personal views sung loudly on the nation we love.
But I am also presenting those that are disrupting our lives on all sides, which is preventing us to live with each other with tolerance and understanding. But that there are people that are instigating separatism, and not able to think for themselves, or think critically. To question those that are feeding the flames. I see this destroying all that people fought for, and losing sight of the here and now, and the hope we held onto to make a nation for all. In the best interest and safety of our nation
for ALL people who live here.
Thanks for your time and as always, find yourself a good cold beverage in this HELLA' HOT weather or wherever you are and TURN UP the playlist for Independence Day U.S.A :).
Please use a laptop, desktop computer or tablet to see the essay in its intended formatting.
say is built around the actual playlist itself, so please listen to the opinions and views of the Artists
themselves. I do realize many of the songs may come from a certain point of view that I put in a different
context as well, so you can decide which pov suits yours. All this blabbing, again, is just a "personal
perspective" that you can take or leave. In many ways the music is more important, but so is the document
that looks out for ALL of us.
BUT PLEASE - Try to especially watch the linked videos provided to see the BIGGER picture, and to trust
what your eyes see and your ears hear - Trust in your own facilities and come to your own conclusions.
"Shapes of things before my eyes, Just teach me to despise, Will time make men more wise?
Here within my lonely frame, My eyes just hurt my brain, But will it seem the same?"
- The Yardbirds/Gary Moore/"Shape of Things"
. . . On this Declaration Day
Chapter 1: the personal price of freedom . . .
Look, I'm going to repeat these points again and again to remind everyone; WE must understand what may anger or insult in what we believe, the other side will have to take the same scrutiny, but that it is an "opinion", and no one needs to adhere to it, especially if it goes against the fundamental principles of the
Constitution of the United States, our basic human rights, and does not physically harm anyone, within the laws governed by each state, or by your common sense ;).
Note that the views presented are the opinion of the writer and does NOT assume to express the opinions and thoughts of anyone else. ~ With much respect and hope that we can live together in peace, yet awake
from those that would throw away the principles of what our nation should stand for.
- A. Velasquez III
leisure. It's a harrowing story though I know many others have had it MUCH more rough than I ever have.
I hope to write a Book about my life as a sort-of "cautionary tale" with hopes others will relate and know
that they are not alone in their plight, but they can reach any goal they set for themselves and take
responsibility for all they are and can be :).
What does it mean to me . . .
What is my family story, my heritage, who am I?
I was born in 1963, the 1st Son born in South Central Los Angeles (baptised a Catholic). My parents were from San Pedro Sula, Honduras, including many of my family members who immigrated from Honduras in the 1960's and others in the early to mid 70's to become citizens of the U.S.. My heritage is Spanish and Italian (on my Father's side. Both parents were from the same city). The Spanish from Toledo and Seville, and the Italian, Milan. My Brother was adamant to clear up that we were NOT Sicilian, even though my father had said often that we were, as confirmed by my mom :p. My Mother's side of the family is similar being from the Iberian Peninsula (possibly a "Moorish" background, which would explain my thick curly dark brown hair). Though I think we have a strong mediterranean strain because my immediate family hate the heat, anything past 75f. is just too much.
We also may be related to the 16th century Spanish Painter; Diego Rodríguez de Silva y Velázquez which my brother also contests, but similarities of look with some of my family members (including me), and that many on my father's side can draw, paint and are quite creative - including my father (many on my mother's side as well), though my father never drew anything unless I asked as a kid. And I can still remember the Hot Rod that he drew for me when I was about 5 years old. I wish I still had it.
I may also be the "1st" to be born in the United States in the Velasquez or Zelaya family :), something I just realized in 2017-18.
Velázquez: "Son of Velasco":
Velasco (also Belasco or Belasko) is a Spanish family name and masculine first name derived from the Basque bela- meaning 'raven' or 'crow' and the diminutive suffix -sco. The name also made its way into Portuguese language as Vasco.
(I LOVE that we are Raven/Crow's, kind of suits me).
My Father was a ranch hand on my Grandfather's Ranchero in Honduras, they were true "Vaqueros". I remember my papa saying he wanted to come to the land of movies, John Wayne and Rock 'n Roll. He wanted to live the American Dream and by the time he was 18, with only a few dollars in his hand, would earn his way here with established relatives/friends, working hard and applied for citizenship (probably between 1959 and 1962). I vaguely remember that he butted heads with his father, even though hard working, he wanted to find his independence, and able to live a life with more opportunities. He tried to join the Marine Corps in 59 and 61 I believe. But he was turned down on account that he had "flat feet". It kind of scares me to think he could've been sent to Vietnam, not come back, or damaged mentally and/or physically.
He worked hard all his life, and my Mother too. She worked as a seamstress in Downtown LA (was it a sweatshop? Don't know. But I do remember visiting many times with my Dad, having lunch at the small lunch wagon, eating a sandwich with chocolate milk or drinking hot cocoa. Everybody seemed "happy" at the job), and my papa worked at Langendorf Bakery on the graveyard shift. When he'd come home I sometimes got up to greet him and he smelled of fresh baked bread, its one of my happiest memories of him :).
I always wondered why my parents were not more strict about me learning Spanish as a kid, many years later they told me that they wanted me to integrate into the American way of life. Probably because they too wanted to fit in. My Father learned english by watching TV and especially American Football (becoming a diehard Raider fan) and my mom learning it in college in British Honduras (now Belize).
They spoke english or "broken" english at any given time amongst themselves and family. They seemed very personable and friendly to everyone around them. I learned as much as I could but "understood" more than speaking fluently. Me and my brother would be known as the "Gabachos" of the family. As far as I know, we are the only 2 of 4 that don't speak fluent spanish in our families.
We lived a comfortable middle class American life (so it seemed) in a city near Bellflower California where it was made up of multicultural peoples (Cudahy). A much different place back then in 1965 to 1971 where I could ride a tricycle to a Foster's Freeze for Ice Cream or a Burger.
My dad even owned a MG 1963 "Midget" and a 1965 (fully loaded) Red Mustang, then purchased a 1967 Mustang "Fastback" (my Mom had trouble with the 65 stick shift). A car I thought would be mine but "humidity" from a move would destroy that hope :(.
and The Beatles were 2 of my papa's favorites). I would become a music aficionado and into its rich and
colorful history, but the sound of overdriven/distorted guitars would be the spark in my musical interests. In his later years, my papa followed Country & Western but was very particular about its sound (not "pop music with a southern accent" he would say). We used to watch many variety shows of the time, and guests that would make their debut or become regulars on Johnny Carson, The Midnight Special, Don Kirshner's
Rock Concert, Hee Haw and other shows (I recall this as Chuck Berry had just passed away at 90 years old)
that debuted many a Rock, R&B, Soul and little did I know, early Hard/Heavy Rock and a genre I hardly knew anything about; Progressive Rock. In "1977" a certain album and band would be my 1st awakening what music could be.
School was often fun, though I got sick a lot when summer was close or in September. I'd get massive
headaches from the intense sun, in which I also got stomach aches and vomited often. My father would
pick me up from the nurse's office, sleeping on their cots, and I'd have cereal for dinner before taking a
nap. I was always more comfortable in cooler temperatures. Today I still can't function well in the heat (as I type in 2016, its over 100f. and minimal air conditioning). My classmates were made up of every race. It
was a very multicultural school in rural Bellflower.
I even had my 1st girlfriend at 5 :p. Her name was "Kimberly", she had jet black hair and lived across the
street. I used to put flowers in her hair and we'd kiss at the side of my house where no one was looking.
My Mom has pictures of us running from the water hose during a summer. I can remember chasing her
and I slipped on the concrete and landed on my back with the back of my head hitting the pavement 1st and with a thud, it sounded like a "Boing" from a Flintstones cartoon. And the back of my head was bleeding as I screamed seeing the blood stream off with the water. Before that incident - I had run down the hallway to kick a stack of large Lego's I set up in the living room, I was told not to run down the hall or I'd hurt myself - sure enough I smacked into the frame of the door where the door jam was, I remember feeling my
forehead and blood was on my fingers, ran to the mirror and it looked like I had a 3rd bloody eye! Ran to
my Mom screaming, she finally focused on my wound and spanked me, then rushed to my father, both
now panicked, jumped into the MG racing to the nearest emergency room. Apparently they couldn't sedate
me because I was soo hysterical, so they stitched me up while screaming.
After having many blows to the head throughout my life, it may explain why I'm so weird and odd in the
head.
A trip to the Motherland . . .
I'm recalling my 2 trips to Honduras, that I was reminded of, from my "head injury" as a kid. So I must've been 6 or 7. After having the bandage on for a couple of months and "stitches". It was my 1st trip to Honduras and
the city that my Mom and Dad were from (and many family members, MANY because both sides of the family are HUGE), San Pedro Sula.
2 things I remember on the first trip, the stitches taken out of my head I was crying very loudly (imagine feeling "every stitch" being pulled from your forehead at 6-7 years old).
And visiting my Grandfather's Banana Plantation (I have to ask family if they were part of this) and the home nearby (my Mom's Dad) that was built on stilts, much like homes in Louisiana, which I imagine was because of tropical flash floods? Though I seem to remember the land was flat?
The 2nd time was when I was 11-12, I remember staying at a corner market/home that belonged to my
Father's family also in San Pedro Sula, cracks in the wall with the outside light streaming in, coca-cola/fanta soda in bottles and "pan dulce" (sweet bread) for breakfast. Roaches in the flour bin, large roaches on my wall as I tried to sleep (I really hate roaches). Going deep into the forests to beautiful streams, rivers and waterfalls where many tourists go. Beach resorts with white sands, beautiful blue water and parasols made of dried
leaves.
Visiting my Grandfather's "Ranch", where they raised Long horned Brahma Bulls. Where I was "staring" at one of the huge steers (yeah! I'm an idiot!), it began to charge at me, I ran to an edge of a cliff, and below was a trail that led to a raging river, and upon those rocks were women, about 10 to 15, all washing clothes . . . topless.
I didn't know if I should run from the steer, or run down to the river that made my face turn red, but I imagine that the sight "aroused" me as well . . . but too young to know anything. To this day I have no recollection of what trail I took from there :p.
There was a very unique Hamburger Stand on a side of a mountain, that you could only get to with a 4 x 4. We
must've gone a few times from my request, the burger was like nothing I ever had before, and the view of the valley was spectacular as the sun went down.
Another wonderful memory was walking back to the family store ahead of my Dad, Uncle/Dad's best friend
Otto and another family member, when older teenagers were making fun of me (I understood enough Spanish and could easily tell they were mocking the "Americano" demeanor), I started cussing them out (!), and
another kid came from behind me and held a "knife" to my throat, and said something (as I hear the tone
now) as if to threaten me. I was cold as a stone for a few, and then YELLED out to my Dad! He and the other
teens laughed as they ran away, seeing my Father and Uncles running up to me. My Dad checked to see if I was okay, then ran off to see if he could catch up to the punks. While my uncle consoled me, my dad was FURIOUS, asking me; "WHY DIDN'T YOU USE YOUR KARATE!!!?" . . . . rrrright (more of that below).
I seem to find trouble (or it finds me) no matter where I go. I'm sure I wasn't in any real danger now that I
think of it, just some young punks being stupid. If they did any worse, I'm sure my family would have had the authorities punish them, as everyone in the neighborhood knew them, those kids would have been in HUGE trouble, as "Federales" in vietnam era uniforms, helmets and Enfield M-1's were on almost every street at that time, didn't know why.
Further research reveals: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_Honduras#1955%E2%80%931979
Note: If anyone is wondering if me or my Mom and Dad were born with silver spoons in our mouths, WE didn't
see ANY of it. My Mom and Dad started from the bottom up when they became U.S. Citizens, living in Louisiana and then California in the early 1960's. They were the hardest working people I've ever known.
So that was my extent of Honduras, and meeting many family members that would eventually become
American Citizens just a few years after. Many were very educated in various Universities and my young aunts on my Dad's side were very "pretty", as I recall having a crush on a few. Most on my Mom's side moved to Louisiana, a few in California, and most on my Dad's side to California as well. Attended many parties and weddings with lots of great food! :)
custom cars, so I was fascinated by Hot Rods, Racing Cars, but especially Dragsters and Funny Cars. So I
drew cars all the time. And really weird to think I drew (tried) Bikini clad women next to them sometimes,
and hid those drawings away . . . what a perv. The rest of my life was drawing cars until a particular
summer many years later. From 5 to 14 years old, all I enjoyed was drawing and music. And going to the
movies with my parents which also enriched my life, also watching classics with my dad on TV.
Moving away from home.
I never knew what "racism and bigotry" was until we moved to Louisiana in 1971. My Mother wanted to be closer to her family whom most, on her side of the family lived in different parts of the state.
Enrolled in a Catholic School, I hated wearing "khakis", and to make matters worse, thinking a place of
God would keep me safe (it could have been MUCH worse, so I believe I was "watched over"), I was picked
on by a Teacher who was not a Nun, and by the bullies of the school (in and out of class), all on a daily basis
because I had "dark" olive skin, I was skinny and had nappy short hair (my hair has always been a
nightmare). So in-turn I did awful in classes. I just wanted to be home (and go back "home" to California). This would be the very beginning of angry parents all through elementary to high school. Basically ruined schooling throughout my life. I totally appreciate those that hit the books, work and go to school to better themselves, but it was never my thing. I learned many things on my own from simple curiosity of history, arts and music. Even through this adversity, I had my 2nd girlfriend at 7. She was a blonde girl named Jean Millet, the sister of my neighborhood friend Paul. But about a year or 2 later, as kids get older, the
neighborhood kids would whisper in each other's ears that "my kind" didn't belong. So ended friendships that summer (and my next door neighbor Joey, who was a year older) when my father pulled a gun on 2 kids that were following me home and making fun of me (who I screamed every obscenity I could think of).
Word spread and that probably gave my parents incentive to look for a home to own in another part of
Jefferson Parish.
But a blessing happened to us that I gained a little Brother who I loved very much and shared my goofy
sense of humor (see last pic above, as my brother tries to make a "peace sign") :).
We moved from our rented home to a newer community and I was off to Elementary School with a new set of bullies, and many of them also went to the Junior high school. My father would also tell us that he would get into verbal fights with employees, and even physical fights - as my father would say "I don't care if they make fun of me, I ignored them, but when they made fun of you guys..." :(. This was while working as a Welder for Avondale Shipyards which built Destroyers for the Navy.
Many years later, a movie I could very much relate to (and in "life") . . .
With an admiration for Bruce Lee back in my Cali days, with my father's blessing, he and my mom looked into Martial Arts to defend myself. They found out about a private tutor for me and a Brother and Sister
that were children of my Dads friends from Honduras. From what I can remember, the tutor was a super
cool Black woman about 27, a Brown Belt in Kempo Karate. She was very disciplined and stern with us but by no means cruel or too hard. But before we'd start with the lessons at our friends home in their yard, we would do various calisthenics. The 3 that would do me good in the long run would be:
1. Doing 50 to 80 pull-ups.
2. Various stretching of my legs, the only thing I couldn't do were splits, but I could sidekick and leave my leg up extended until the sensei told me to put it down (I can almost still touch my palms on the ground while bending down, knees locked). Or sit in a lotus position and touch my head to the floor.
3. We had to do push-ups on the grass or on concrete on our knuckles or the back of our wrists (which I can still do, I also have this habit when I walk down a street, I punch walls of various materials, coarseness and hard surfaces, not hard by any means but just to keep the knuckles strong). Which made our joints more flexible, sturdy, able to take blows and make our punches and strikes hard as a rock.
We had gone through our Green Belts (2nd Degree/2nd Dan) when it seemed our teacher wanted us to take classes at her new location. So our parents followed our sensei, as we arrived I can vaguely remember the neighborhood, but when we entered the courtyard, it was obviously a black neighborhood and I remember what many kids in school called "The Projects". I can remember all the kids staring at us and feeling out of place, my Parents "looking" uncomfortable, and the sensei excited to show us where we would have our classes.
We didn't even have a class, as my parents took our teacher aside and talked at-length. What comes after is a blur, I seem to remember my sensei's face now, it was sad, disappointed. In my parents, us and maybe
even herself :(. I have never told this story - all these years I have felt bad for her. She had a new dojo
where she could take on many kids and we could all learn the values of discipline and enjoy the learning.
I know my parents meant well, they wanted us "safe", but the worry of "Those People" was sure a factor. We must've been a big let down to this Teacher. After that day, I never saw her again :(.
By this time, I entered a new public junior high school, and was picked-on daily again (not as bad as
others, but never got into full-on fights with anyone, but a lot of threats and intimidation. I hated to be in
school) with now, "3" other teachers picking on me. Hating school even more, just passing grades with the
skin of my teeth and getting scolded at home.
Just about every other day by Black, White and Cajun/Creole people I'd be called a "Nigger" and other
names with my Geeky/Nerdy friends which were made-up of various races ironically. Even a very cute
redheaded girl named "Linda Hamilton", who was from Alabama, with a very thick accent (which was
made fun of). White, and mostly Black kids would walk up to my face and ask;"ARE YOU BLACK!?" just
about everyday. The school did nothing to stop any of it, even though the Principle looked like "Chico"
from the show "Chico and the Man" (the late Freddie Prinze Sr.). There are only few situations I actually
remember vividly, there were many more instances of bullying that I have vague recollections of being
shoved, slapped from behind, insults and whatever else - as if my brain tries to make it all go away.
My father was adamant that I "stand up for myself" and enrolled me in a Shotokan Karate School (it seems the dojo I attended in Jefferson Parish does not exist any longer) that was part of the Japan Karate
Association/American Federation, All South Karate Federation & Louisiana Karate Association. Well, I was told that I had to take a "test" to see if I could make it into the beginners class. But once they saw how easy I did push-ups and "how" I did them, including my punches and kicks, they immediately put me into the advanced class.
Even though I was one of the top students, I hated "sparring" with the others, so I had to spar with my
teacher many times as a sort of punishment. But thinking about it now, I liked it better that way because I wasn't holding back, I was afraid that I'd hurt the other kids, but my Sensei was an All South Champion. But my father was always upset with me, and at times he would make me spar with him at home (later in life, my Uncle/My Mom's Brother-in law, who was his best friend when they were kids, told us that my Dad was sort of the "enforcer" of their group of friends, if anyone wanted to fight them, they had to go through my Dad). I would be very upset with all my dad's micro-managing of every move at the school, so
I took out my rage at him sparring. He would be "proud" and with tears in his eyes would lift up his shirt and proudly say "See! You can do it!" while I stared at all the bruises I gave him. My father could be really
fucked-up. I must have been only 10 to 13 years old. I did not feel "proud" of beating my dad up. That did
not make me "man up" or feel like a man at all.
Every Belt test I was nervous, we were tested by the School founder from Japan, Master Takayuki Mikami
who was a world champion in the late 50's and 60's. But with every test I passed (I did enjoy learning each "Kata" for each level though) - from a White Belt to a 3rd Dan Brown Belt by the time I was 14. I was
basically taught to never use it unless it was the last resort. I knew the force I had in my punches and kicks (especially my kicks). And if I did use it, I was to incapacitate the person and RUN! So I was always afraid to use it because I'd lose it. I have always known I would be entranced and go into "berserker" mode. So I
endured the crap until my last year when finally, my parents decided to go back to California. I've only used what I learned twice, and in a sense not really. But I hope to never get into a fight, I don't want to see or be
that person.
Though the 'N'awlins cuisine is extra special, the seafood was awesome, and I had great times with my
family who I loved very much at many get-togethers, I just wanted to go "home". The last thing the state
took from us was my dad's awesome 67 Mustang Fastback about a year before, the humidity ate up the
trunk with rust, and was traded for a silver Chevy Blazer that wasn't even a 4 X 4. Again, it sucks that I
wanted that car when I was 14. How different my life would have been I think.
The long road back home . . .
Through the various towns blurring by, the rest stops and motels, the deserts and the warm winds while catching all the rock songs of that year (and year before) on the radio that would become classics, we were on our way back to palm trees and a sense of peace and tranquility. I'm sure leaning on my arms on the window of the truck I had a big smile.
The summer of 1977 we arrived in San Fernando Valley California and lived for a few months with my Aunt and Uncle (my Dad's sister). I can actually remember warm summers but the best sleep I ever had, waking up to a cool brisk breeze through the window and slowly faded out from slumber to have breakfast with my family. I was happy to be back. Never again would I have such a sound sleep. I cannot remember ever a time sleeping so peacefully feeling completely rested.
My parents finally found a home but I can recall they were not too happy about it, we had not lived in an "apartment" since we lived in South Central LA when I was a toddler. We all had to adjust, but my Mom and Dad worked very hard to save up for a home. I can remember how worried my dad was, having a job with some longevity and find a nice city to live in. We lived on Van Nuys blvd. in Panorama City when they just stopped cruising on the blvd. But it was a very safe neighborhood at that time. Daily I'd skateboard
down the blvd., the local strip malls and the smooth marble sidewalks. There was a Tower Records store
down the street and I'd see many classic albums being released, but my music knowledge was in its
infancy. Soon I'd have my own LP's as gifts during my Birthday and coming Christmas while I went to
School. Strangely, 9th grade was still Junior High in the county, so I did 1 semester there. I was picked on in an art class of all places, by a group of "cool" kids, sadly one of them was a girl I had a crush on. The girl
had asked me; "Hey! are you a LESSSSBIIIIIAN? Hahaha!" - yeah, pretty stupid. Ironically her name was Leslie. I can remember distinctly thinking I should have said; "No - are 'you' LESSSSSLIEEEE?".
I may have been beat up by her friends but that would have been well worth it :D.
Other than that, school was . . . okay. I was doing . . . okay, but I had 2 good friends and the lunches were awesome! Probably the last good lunch I'd have at a school. It was more like a really good cafeteria at a place of business with lots of choices of food (the kind you see when kids are talking in line on a TV series).
This is where I have told the story about being a Kiss fan (a novice one, not like many other cool kids) that started in the last year of living in Louisiana, and talking about Peter Criss's drum solo on Kiss Alive II with a friend - the star player on the basketball team, this handsome black guy with an afro butts-in quietly and says; "Hey, if you want to hear some real drumming, listen to Carl Palmer (of ELP)". If only I took his advice back then, it would take another 4 years to explore the music that would change my life.
Life change.
Before school started, there was an intriguing advertisement. I actually lived across the street from a huge billboard, it was entirely black with only distinct (font) white lettered words that said; "A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away - STAR WARS". I had no idea what it was, don't recall seeing any commercials or other posters. But my Aunt said to me at a family function; "Yeah we saw it, it was okay, it had these funny little people with yellow eyes, but you may like it".
When my papa decided we should finally go see it, the lines were smaller but audiences were not ready for what was in store, neither was I. As soon as those 2 ships flew over our heads . . . I was done. I became an instant Star Wars fanatic and collected, not toys, but anything "visual" so that I could draw them. Up till then it was Hot Rods, but now it gave me a taste for Science Fiction and Fantasy. A week or 2 after, my dad loved taking sunday drives to Hollywood. There was a Bookstore that used to be on Hollywood Blvd. with a large picture window, facing it was an open book with sketches and a painting from Star Wars of a Tie Fighter pilot/over the shoulder shot, as he aimed at a Y-Wing. And it was then I asked the question; "Wait, someone had to draw, paint and design these things in the film? I want to do THAT!". Because of Ralph McQuarrie, Joe Johnston as well as George Lucas inventing this "Job" position - that's what I wanted to be from that day forward. A "Conceptual Designer" in Film.
Star Wars literally changed my life.
. . . NOT what my parents had in mind for me throughout school and my adult life . . . at all. I was NEVER encouraged in my abilities, all my art was thrown away because it was either "garbage" or a "fire hazard". I had to hide many pieces of art or stood up to them that they could not destroy my art, I almost had to
fight for it. So just about all my art from 1980 back to my childhood is gone.
Our new home . . .
We finally made a big move to the city of West Covina in 1978. A nice suburb still within Los Angeles county and my dread of being in Highschool, knowing it would be harder to maintain passing grades. Again, my parents hard work paying off to provide the best they could for me and my brother, we never needed for anything. Dad coming home exhausted and "burned" from Welding, building trailers for "Utility" (you see them on every highway) and my mom working for the Auto Club of California. This was a harder time,
coming to an age that I realized I had serious problems with "numbers", math. I was interested reading on my own and improving my art during my junior and senior years at Nogales High in La Puente. But I was a huge disappointment to my parents not doing very well in any of my classes.
I had "school" friends that were just about anybody; "Chicano's" in local gangs (they liked my art), people of any race, sci-fi drawing geeks challenging each other drawing spaceships, and a few that shared some of the bands I enjoy to this day from the late 70's. My friend Rick who was in band in the drum corp
introduced me to Pink Floyd and Jeff Beck. And I befriended a "born again" named Glenn who had the
same interests in bands like Genesis, Kansas, Styx, Pink Floyd and others. He'd talk to me about Christ, ("are you ready to make Jesus your personal savior?") even though I had always had Him in my life, but I didn't really know Him. Its funny to think he made me scared of the commitment with the questions he asked of me which was coming from someone excited to spread the Gospel. Through the years I came to realize, not only did I not know Him at all, I also realized having Him in my life would always be a struggle anyway. I wasn't perfect and never would be, but I was a work in progress.
I started reading the Bible almost each day about 7 years ago, especially the New Testament, but part of the reason why I read everyday was because I have a really bad memory of certain points and characters in ANY book. I'm better at remembering useless trivia and info - too many blows to the head I imagine. I can be a very thorough "researcher", but if people asked me any historical questions, I'd probably fumble over
words and have trouble being specific with any information. So I'm not good at reading aloud.
So not only did I always have Christ in my life, since having the feeling of "something" out there watching over me, I then began to find out on my own what He was all about, even when Glenn faded from my life after the few years when we graduated, I continued on my personal spiritual quest.
When the wave of Heavy Metal music came for me in 1981, he started on his own path. I noticed the
"change" in him even though I was wide open to learn more, the barrier seemed to be secular music,
especially music he deemed leading some of the "flock astray". But he had a great sense of humor, very
intelligent and MUCH more mature than I was, but he was my best friend for a decade. We hung out a lot
and saw plenty of movies, a few concerts and ate a lot of burgers :D.
because of a poster of the inner image of the album "Brain Salad Surgery". He'd play various musics (one I
distinctly remember Uriah Heep's "Magician's Birthday") while I looked through his many art of books.
One being Roger Dean's "Views", and he was definitely the reason why I became a fan and collector of Sci-Fi/Fantasy Art Books. But he also was an artist, and I "drooled" over his sketchbook, which had little
illustrations of fantasy characters, and he had a distinct "Dean" style in his logos. That stayed with me and
both Dean and Saenz (and artist Rodney Matthews) were the catalyst for being interested in Logo design.
When it was time for me to go, he asked "Would you like to borrow the sketchbook?", I held onto that book
for another 2 years. Somehow I contacted him to give it back, but unfortunately lost track of him, and have
tried to search for him on social media with no luck. I would like to thank him for giving me an extra push
to my art pursuits, and inspiring my love for those particular musics.
A little freedom, lots of disappointment.
But my last years in highschool were almost non-existent. I did not do homework . . . at all, I don't think any class assignments stuck in my head or at the very least not caring about it, only in history. I even drew Warplanes on my final and how they were utilized in WWII which wowed my teacher enough to warrant a A-.
P.E. was my last class of the day in my Senior year. Me and a friend Rob would hang at the Stadium
shooting the shit, talking about whatever interested us and riding my G&S Warptail 2 skateboard on the bleachers, until 30min. before the last bell, and jumped the fence to go home early. And because of P.E. I failed my last year to graduate with my class of 81. I did not care one bit.
But it destroyed my parents and that was really rough, but school did absolutely nothing for me, except my Art classes. It was a college level class taught by Howard Hollander and I'll forever be grateful for that. Though if I did more of what he said instead of "rebelling" on certain things, I would have been a MUCH better artist.
But art didn't matter to my folks, they wanted me to be something I wasn't, and that was anything from a Architect, Car Engineer, or some job at a Fortune 500. "Are you gonna' be a clown or a ditch digger!?" My Dad would often ask (I was a bit of a "Funny Guy" all through my childhood, I was into comedians, comedy shows, I was goofy and wacky, influenced by Monty Python and SCTV. So I have always had an irreverent sense of humor - I liked to make people laugh, still do, when I'm not a grumpy old fart these days, but
that's where the question came from - my humor came from the anger at home). I used to be a very
idealistic "happy" guy, even through all the anger hurled at me and my sadness. But I didn't stand up for myself, only in moments. I let people walk over me, even though I was conscious soon after how I was taken for a fool, and then I beat myself up in my own head, along with saying things that would embarrass
myself - that I can still recall, and makes me blush to this day.
I was threatened to continue onto "Continuation School", and then go to college after, but I actually would receive my Nogales Diploma if I passed. I did great! Got my diploma, met a guy that was going to go see
Rush on their "Moving Pictures" Tour, and that conversation got me into my fave band :).
I went to Mount San Antonio College, but at this time they had a lousy Art program. There was more talk than doing, and I was way advanced. So the 2nd term I quit and kept myself away from the house as much as I could. In Highschool I took a tour of The Art Center of Design in Pasadena, saw everything that could have helped me in my life. But I knew it was expensive and that my parents would not help, so I didn't
pursue to coax them into enrolling me. I think too that I was still a teen with a "kids" mind and was not ready to put my foot down and say "I want this!". It would be many years later my Mom would say; "You
know, we should have put you through an Art college in Spain or Italy to get an education" . . .
too little too late . . . thanks. But it was my fault as well, I should have told them that this would help my career and life - damn regrets. Very stupid.
The parent relationship would start its long painful decline. Lots of arguments, strange rules (yet I was
always allowed to listen to my music and no one cared if I played it loud, and it was no problem if I stayed out late - very weird). I did chores, which I had no problem doing but everything I did was wrong in my father's eyes. No matter what it was, I'd get barked at, yelled at, insulted. The odd rules would deny me learning how to drive, or using their cars to learn. Though with my jobs I was allowed to go to concerts
with friends (often I'd ask my parents if my brother could come along), earning money from my 1st jobs, out of town taking public transportation. My 1st job was set-up by a friend from high school who turned out to be a real jerk at the job, at a printing shop where I cut business cards and sometimes set-up camera shots. They could have taught me soo much more but they declined (this is the time I picked up many of my 1st Lp purchases at the "Zody's Department Store" across the street). My 2nd job was from another friend who I met, who lived next door to Glenn Mayfield, named Alex Zandor, we were both interested in playing guitar and in many of the earlier Heavy Metal guitar shredders of the 80's (like Eddie Van Halen, Ritchie Blackmore, Randy Rhoads, Michael Schenker, Robin Trower and others).
He got me a job at a place in Alhambra that made electrical cables for Nuclear Power Plants. To think that these cables were made by lacquering them through a shotty, primitive simple way by a jimmy rigged
plastic bucket with a hole drilled on 2 sides and a piece of tire rubber to "scrape" off the excess, seemed a bit . . . dangerous and unreliable?
The boss was a red headed, freckled woman with leathery skin that looked like a man with long hair and chin hairs who barked orders at everyone before she left, as we worked the graveyard shift. And married to one of the co-workers that had a head as wide as his neck, thick glasses and twitched.
So weekends were very much looked forward to, as I'd spend time with Glenn and Alex, mostly Alex who's Hungarian Grandmother would often invite me over for dinner who often said "Eat, EAT!" which I was happy to oblige. In this immaculate home, they had food in every room, you'd open up a drawer, and there were different types of candy bars, they had sodas in the fridge of all flavours, and just about every snack imaginable.
The Grandmother was odd to say the least, she cursed like a sailor in a whorehouse, and she watched
"Porn" on subscription TV as if she was watching soap operas! . . . yyyyyeeeeEEEEeeaahhh.
I don't think Alex came over more than once, my Dad was a bit odd about friends coming over. At the same time I'd hear crap about the few friends I had (they weren't troublemakers at all, they were completely
harmless), to not having enough, depending on their moods they could or not come over, and occasionally telling me "You know why you don't have friends? Because you don't have any personality!".
Just a little more courage . . .
When I was about 19 or 20, I quit those jobs and started looking for jobs that were a bike ride away. The
distance growing with Glenn and Alex came about this time as well.
I had 3 good friends at that time (they are always in 2's and 3's); Mike, Don and Bruce who had similar
tastes in music, all 3 were Motorheads working on their Muscle cars, into Sci-Fi and building model kits.
I could particularly relate mostly with Mike D'Amico at the time. We had more in common in our
personalities, and we could talk about many personal things more-so than with others. I met these guys
working in Diamond Bar California at "Barro's Pizza" where I was a Prep, Pizza Cook, Pizza Oven
Attendant and Salad/Sandwich/Pasta maker (and the few times that I was a cashier that scared me to death
- I'd have customers counting the change back for me. Very, very embarrassing).
I got along with most of the people there, including the Barro's brothers. But there were a small group of cliques that either looked down on or made fun of me. I always looked younger than everyone, but most of these assholes were 1 to 5 years younger than me. Growing up, I started to get a bit more "angrier" and
when 1 or 2 of these jerks would try to intimidate me, I was ready to talk back or be ready for a fight. Once it came close, but nothing ever happened. 1 female manager was one of these clowns, and she would make
me do a lot more of the dirty work (and listen to the God-awful 80's Top 40 stations), but there was a
really cool guy named Brian Salseman (mostly a mid-day and evening manager) who was a fellow Rush
fan and other rock musics. We'd blast KLOS and KMET FM on the radio, do our work with a bit more gusto and have a great time, even when we were swamped for lunch and sometimes worked the dinner shift and closed.
At this time to, was my education on the new Metal that was coming out during 1982 to 85 as KMET had one of the 1st all Metal shows with Dj Jim Ladd called "KMET's Metal Shop/KMETal shop" which featured many bands that are now considered classics in the genre, as well as the New Wave of British Heavy Metal (NWOBHM), every friday evening, my favorite day to be at work. And would be there for 5 years. After that, a few other pizza joints and restaurants for 2 more years but it was never the same. I was in pretty good shape too, it was a 3 mile ride on a Diamondback "Silver Streak" BMX bike there and back. Through the rain, cold and heat, hills and straightaways. I might have complained a bit, but I mostly loved riding through all that, summers were hard as I was soaked in sweat before work but it kept me in a great physical condition. I rode hard, even in winter, by the time I came home, I worked up a sweat! It was a bit cathartic as well,
riding through the night, looking at the stars, empty streets, sidewalks of small business parks and roads
with only a few cars going to respective jobs or coming home. Its a great memory of solitude and freedom.
1 more move . . .
Things changed again, with life and parents, we moved to Chino where my parents bought a larger home to hopefully one day buy a few horses, which was my Dads biggest dream. Even though we had a hard time with each other, I wanted that for him as well. But I was farther from my friends now, and I began to feel very isolated in a town I really didn't like or know, as of yet.
Worked at a restaurant for a year as a cook at 1st, but I wasn't fast enough. So I became a prep and was
managed over by another asshole who would lecture me on not making any food for myself to snack on while he'd do the opposite and eat in front of my face while I worked. As well as giving attitude whenever he had the chance. I never understood this happening over and over, I always did my work promptly and
efficiently. I guess there are certain types that feel better about themselves by micro-managing and feeling in control with their employee's (power hungry?). Everybody goes through this I know, its nothing new but it gets tiring, why would anyone want to deal with that everyday? Why DO we put up with it? But many people go with the flow and just charge ahead. I sometimes hated how my mind works, sometimes I feel its a curse to "think too much" and see things differently that most people.
But, have any of you ever cleaned a Garbage Bin Area? Well its a whole lot of fun, you have to clean up the "sludge" that's sat there for weeks (or months) from trash thrown in the dumpster and may be clogging the drains outside. There is no description of what the most foul stench of GREY "Dumpster Juice" smells like. If Hell has sewers, you may get an idea. I desperately hoped this wasn't what my life would amount to for $6.35 an hour.
I had a crush on one of the managers there, a mature 25 year old brunette who always dressed nice, but her attitude toward me wasn't mutual. I had heard that she thought I was some "Pot Smoking" idiot just doing the lowly job of dishwasher and prepping. I never smoked pot in my life - this gave me more of a reason to just quit out of the blue a few months later. All I could find were temp jobs - from "Ditch Digging" (yup! the clown was digging trenches for sewage pipes at construction sites), Construction site clean-ups,
helping deliver "Antibiotics" for Cows at diarys by the barrel in Altadena, unloading trailers filled with
flies in the extremely hot summers. And various stocking clerk jobs on various shifts at warehouses and
department stores, canary's, assembly, sorting fruits, office clerk, and just about everything else.
None of it was good enough for my parents, especially my father. It was a time that taught me how to
"walk on eggs" and be as quiet as a mouse coming home late or at any time coming and leaving the house. I used to watch late night TV and didn't have one of my own (wasn't allowed to buy one). It would be very embarrassing when I would hide when my father came down stairs to take a sip to drink juice from the
fridge ("slurrrrrrp ahhhhhh - slurrrrrrrrp ahhhhhh" REALLY Dad???). He would either just go upstairs or he's start searching for me, and sometimes he'd find me. It was humiliating to be in my mid and late 20's being treated like that. Why you ask - well I was "wasting electricity" is what they always said. I got yelled at for anything and nothing. I called my room my "Sanctuary", my music, Art books, and creating art pretty much everyday kept me somewhat sane. It's what I did best, I kept drawing till it matured to start looking for jobs of that nature, but it took a few years to get it all focused and know what I was looking for.
Decades of blame . . .
I think its important to mention that as a young man, and as an adult in my 2o's, I blamed my parents, the past in the south for all my troubles, all that I was and the hurt that I felt. It embittered me and chipped
away at my personality. It would be in my 30's, I would begin to see that if I kept on that path, I wouldn't
take self-responsibility to be honest with myself that I needed to change that path, that attitude, and meet
destiny with all I had in me, all that pain, all those life lessons. To take courage, hope and what was best in me to move forward with the goals and ambitions I wanted to achieve.
Escape.
I had an opportunity to move out with one of my friends (Don Parker) to the city of Garden Grove (later we would call it "Garbage Grove" as certain areas were a bit sketchy) in a nicer part of the city and near
Disneyland. I liked the city I was living in and would sometimes explore the neighboring cities.
But it would be the 1st of many experiences living on my own or with roommates in poverty, not
"living/looking" like squalor but hitting rock bottom not able to land jobs or interviews. I was kind of naive about a lot of things - I only blame this on my parents that confused me a bit, it would be a lot to describe here but they had the weirdest rules, which contradicted what they wanted or allowed me to do. So in many ways I was isolated from the real world, I wasn't prepared or encouraged to be something better, just
barked at. But I also realized much later that I also needed to take charge of myself and focus, think outside the box. In many ways I was mature, but surviving in the world, immature for my age. I was really mixed up (too many blows to the head? Yes, maybe). Is anyone really prepared for the real world on their own? I felt like I was sheltered a bit, but then forced out - "Go! Fend for yourself!".
I started having a fallout with my roommate friend because of the lack of work (so strange he wouldn't get me a job at "The Price Club" which was a membership market warehouse that he worked at for many
years, even though I asked if I could apply). But trying to get to know the area, I would naively ask certain places if they were looking for an Artist. I also got a connection to an independent Steam Carpet
Cleaning/Cleaning Service job that was owned by a Jock dude/Bodybuilder and his brother, cleaning Office buildings which I didn't mind at all but the boss just didn't let us do our job without bossing us around. If I'm not mistaken, I created a logo for him for a potential gym/martial arts dojo that they wanted to start, and they didn't pay me. Great.
His neighbor, Tom, a super funny guy who talked a million miles an hour, I had shared some of my art
work as he wanted to get into the T-Shirt Graphics industry (who I was contracted to create a few designs for his own line of shirts), and he told me about his friend Tim who also was an artist (with an Art Degree from the University of Oklahoma). I called the number he left and we hit it off right away, especially
because of the music we had in common. A week later I had gone into a local Art Framing store asking if anyone needed artwork, I showed my work and the woman said; "You know, your art reminds me of someone who works here, his name is Chris", so I left my number for him to call me. Again, we hit it off right away,
again, because of our music likes - it turned out all 3 of us liked the same bands, especially, Pink Floyd,
Genesis, UK, Kansas and Rush :).
We 3 became best friends, seeing concerts, movies and hanging out. We all went through some lean times, which was tough, when I had no money to do anything, they couldn't be around. As I understood why -
that they too were trying to make ends meet, they couldn't share a meal with me when we'd hang out all the time. No one was really doing creative art for a living, just whatever 9 to 5 they could find while
developing their art skills. Tim though knew some people in the T-Shirt graphics field. His friend Ruben would get us into a company as freelancers contributing and bidding designs for various surfwear (we all would also meet Dale, another budding artist - whom I connected with again 25 years later, which I now help out in the organic carpet cleaning biz, yet hardly make ends meet). For most of us it would be our 1st Freelance gigs. It broadened my palate and helped me experiment with my art. Unfortunately the jobs were
not enough to keep me afloat. From feast to famine, hand to mouth. It gave me my 1st taste of how to
present my art. But life became too much to handle. Had to move under duress, yet again.
I was living in Buena Park for less than a year, ironically around the corner from the Surfwear company yet no work whatsoever. Lived with 3 guys from Argentina, and one of them an incredible drummer who played in a latino band that played hits, but he was an amazing Jazz/Fusion player (who worshipped
"Vinnie Colaiuta"). But I was a burden, I had no money for food, let-alone rent . . .
I had to "beg" my parents to come back . . . home. It had to be the WORST years with my parents (and now being in my early 30's but felt like a lost kid), especially with my Dad. I missed out on a few things when I was away, as having the chocolate brown Arabian Stallion mount the White Arabian Mare, and the birth of their Colt. Some friends thought we were "wealthy" which was far from the truth, the horses were "Big Pets". I actually didn't mind cleaning after them, though I was very intimidated by "Magnus" the Stallion, which rose up once as I brushed his mane and hit me square on the top of my head with his head and knocked me out - yet again, another blow to my head. Unfortunately my father didn't have the patience to show me and my brother how to ride. But he soon became sick :(.
My Father was diagnosed with Cancer, I believe they found a growth in one of his lungs, and the lungs were coated in white mucus that came from welding and breathing-in the fumes of flux for decades.
I immediately prayed hardcore everyday and evening intensely, methodically, imagining my prayers
through sinew to cosmos as if going through obstacles directly to its source (I'm an intense prayer for others). And months later the Doctors reported that the cancer disappeared. They had no idea how it happened, but they also cleaned away the coating on his lungs and he recovered very quickly. If it was divine intervention, scientific miracle, all the above and blessed Doctors who knew what they were doing.
Whatever it was, even through all the hard, cruel times, I was happy that he made it through. All my father
wanted was to get back to work, and soon he did. He toughed it out somehow. He was a tough guy - I
wished I was that guy.
Separation of Father and Son.
I can see his face now (often I can feel my dad's expressions when I react to something, especially in anger, and his "Elvis lip-quiver" me and my Brother get), he didn't even want to look at me anymore. When he
did, it was with a look of disgust that was hard to just walk away from, and describe to friends. And little by little I was starting to get sick of it and the way I was treated. Trying to make plans to do something to
move out and do something with my art, as I write this I recall there were confrontations that could have ended really badly, especially me out on the streets. Both my parents were on my case about anything, but the big factor was the part-time jobs, but I had to have time to draw, that was important because it would shape my future. I drew much, but the music volume was lower, I wanted to be totally invisible in my
"Sanctuary". I ate dinner alone, tried not to eat their food unless I was invited by my mother which was once a week or nothing at all. It was like being a prisoner in my own family's home. I can remember a
Thanksgiving that I was not feeling very thankful :(. My Brother, Mom and Dad enjoying their feast,
having conversations and laughing, so I got my wish, I was indeed invisible and I felt awful to be left out. I just wanted to be somewhere else. Not a very conducive place for creativity and having hope.
(Sigh . . .) There was an incident that must've sparked from my go nowhere jobs, I may have just come home looking for work in this damned nowhere city (boy, would I be in much worse towns later) of Chino in the late 80's. My dad approached me, berating me for God knows what, and I just looked at him and I believe that was the situation where I said calmly; "what do you want me to say?". I had been fed-up of all the anger at me, being unhappy, feeling smaller than ant shit and picked on daily about anything and
everything. Was sick of sulking on the edge of my bed everyday, sobbing my eyes out and all the abuse to myself of WHY I couldn't get myself out of there. Every day and night prayer after prayer but not doing anything about it. Well the question and the look I gave him infuriated him, my father who was 2 feet shorter than me (me in my mid 30's now) took me by the collar slammed me upwards on the wall of the hallway and started with his threats. I just languidly looked down at him limp with his face and eyes full of rage. He put me down and I put my hands behind my back, and on my knees looked up at him and to this very day is the one thing I remembered clearly saying to him calmly; "Go ahead, hit me, I don't care anymore. You taught me not to disrespect my parents, so go ahead".
He, in total confusion had nothing to say. In frustration he just stomped away.
From that day on we hardly said anything anymore, when he did bark at me, I just didn't care and knew my days were numbered getting kicked out or finding my way out. My good friends were far away now and another, Tim, went back home to Oklahoma (though, I'm glad, because at his church, he would meet his future wife and have 2 awesome kids :). I had no one.
The frustration and bickering between my Mom and Dad was getting worse now, and it was all about me. My Mom was just as mad at me but she didn't want my father to berate me about everything and wanted
him to stop. It was at this time my Mom for some reason told me that she was venting to her friends at her job about me and how I am (stemming from my Dad constantly angry at me, but my Mom wasn't innocent either) . . .
They asked things like; "So does he drink or do drugs? - No, he doesn't do those things. Does he work? - He has part time jobs but he tries to help out when he can and he does chores. So does he hang out with the
wrong people? Does he treat you guys bad, does he yell at you? - No, he is a very nice person and doesn't hangout with bad people . . . So what's the problem?
If I recall correctly, this is the time that I landed a job working at a Comic Book Store that was located in the neighboring city of Claremont which was very popular. It was the place that reaffirmed that I need to do what I dream of doing with my art and refocused and re-evaluated my portfolio.
One early evening it came to a head between my mother and father (which I'll leave out the details), I had to get in front of my dad and calmly but sternly tell him to "back off". I came to the realization that it was my fault all this was going on, but I was also a catalyst for their frustrations, I was the punching bag. But that they were not very nice people behind closed doors, and in things they said and thought about people. Like my friends, people that were "nice" to me. They thought none of them were being "honest" with me
because they were my "friends". THEY on the otherhand had no friends except family members on the
phone or when they were invited to family get togethers which was getting more rare for some reason
(which I never really understood and makes me sad).
I also realized I taught myself ethics, values and faith. To be personable, polite and respectful of others
(which was instilled in me when I was a kid, but those values seemed to go out the window with my parents later. Do as I say not as I do; "because its MY house, because I said so, you know what you are - a loser, you don't
know nothing because you're stupid, you know what you are, you're a huevón!" - and so it went).
So fuck me! But I took that anger toward me and used it as revenge, I'll show them and hold on to my dreams and do something with my art. I was blaming them a lot, but I knew deep down I was the blame for
not taking courage and being responsible. I had a LOT to learn.
That incident basically nailed the coffin shut, my Mom wanted to separate. A life change for all began.
And the heavy weight of guilt, for not only me, but I think my brother as well :(.
Moving on.
Soo many stories in between all the above. My father living alone in a Apartment in Chino that right now as I write is very hard to fathom. My brother decided to live with my mom so that must've hurt my father a lot. My brother started to get harder and angrier as he got older. Seeing what happened between me and my father and what I wasn't doing, he didn't want that to happen to him, and he'd endure body pains, an asshole boss at a job that he has worked now for about 20+ years and help take care of a mortgage with our mother. He's never experienced what its like to be a roommate, and to be out on his own.
My father's health started to wane, and then was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis, it was as if his anger literally twisted him like a pretzel :(. No matter where I lived, I tried to visit at the beginning, but he would lash out, mostly wouldn't listen and not take responsibility in how he treated me. After a time it was too much and I saw him less and less. My brother did his best to help him when needed, to grocery
shopping and making sure he took his medicine. My brother was much more stronger and patient with him than me, but even then, he would be driven off, in tears frustrated. My father often would blame the world for his suffering, it was tiring, but it also broke my heart because he was alone and he didn't let anyone near, not yet anyway. And I was messed up because I loved and hated him, and I feel much guilt about that.
I moved to a boarding house in Pomona for college students in a large old home. But I was lucky enough to have lived to the adjacent converted "carriage garage" (that leaned to one side). I had total privacy . . .
except for the "maintenance man" and family friend of the landlord that lived next door in his mobile home (which involves a very todrey story with the landlord when her husband was alive and bound by a wheelchair), at the beginning he was very friendly, later embittered with other weird behavior around me - another long story and another story for my "Book" I guess.
while I cleaned each floors bathrooms. Some of the tenants were a bit nuts and I'll let you imagine what I had to clean in the men's bathroom/Shower. All this among the area they called the "Pomona Arts Colony" which at the time was just getting the word out of its eclectic scene.
The neighbors were interesting to say the least, next door on one side was a very talented up and coming prop maker and artist who was a gay mexican american, and he and his friends would work on various
projects (everything he made, no matter what it was, was created in paper mache'). Next door on the other side was an ex-con who became clean and sober, he was a very nice guy (I had to ask often if my music bothered him, but mostly he was okay with it). Across from him was a guy in and out of trouble but who was trying to go the straight and narrow while being the building's handyman, who often argued with the landlord (usually for good reasons actually). There was a rather large woman who was a well read "Pack Rat" with books and magazines wall to wall and on the floor, who was the landlord's bookkeeper. There was a notorious bi-sexual man who was a bit nuts and talked to himself and creeped everyone out (Whom I
suspected was the one leaving the bathroom on my floor in chaos). A pleasant friend Alex, who was
attending Cal Poly Pomona studying Architecture. And various young people who were students, hippies, Goths and Punks all living in the massive bank. I'd attend parties thrown by one of the local artists, a gay man who was my age, and was my 1st real conversation at length (along with the artist neighbor) with a homosexual, but it opened my eyes to a "wider reality".
Close to the end of my time there, the landlord started renting rooms as rehearsal studios because 1 floor above were these metalheads playing loudly around 1am and the music would bounce from their room window to the building across the street and back into our building. I was pretty fierce by then and shouted above, outside my window. The music stopped and we'd hurl insults at each other!
So I marched-up to the room (what the hell was I thinking?) and we exchanged words, but I told them that I was a "metalhead" too, but I needed sleep because I had to get up early for work. Heads cooled off and we talked about the music we liked, and surprisingly they invited me to come to play with them when I had the time. This guy who seemed to speak for the rest, was a lean but pretty tough looking dude who played the drums. I had never played with a "band" before but even though I wasn't a "musician" by any means, I seemed to play better than the rest of the guys (Ha!). But it was a great experience to be in the mechanics of a band, keeping in time and teaching each other playing in tune, in sync and the art of "improvisation". It was fun while it lasted, with my horribly beat up "Harmony" black Strat that was drilled, retrofitted and beat-up to hell and back that had stickers plastered on it that said "Killed" (as in my guitar has been killed!).
Was having a bit more courage to ask girls out, but being shut down because I realized I was a geeky "kid" who was actually in his 30's but didn't look it. I was never "cool", never self-assured or arrogant, but
always self-deprecating. Again, too many blows to the head.
I continued to work on my art, living in the "Brick Oven" which I deemed when summer came and had
nothing to cool the room but an open window. I would have friends come over before we headed to a
Cafe/Speakeasy at the nearby intersection in the Art Colony on Second and Main (Galleries, unusual and antique shops that were scattered all around downtown Pomona - Many gay creatives, goths, poets,
writers and artsy types I'd meet at the Cafe and at random parties). When I'd open my door, a rush of "Hot Wind" would hit them from the room holding in all the heat (with a "Whoa!"), that somehow I got used to.
But my forearms would stick to my art, and I'd drip sweat on my art. I was the "pizza" that greeted people at the door. This was also a time of certain friends that were not friends at all, I think they kept me around for "laughs" even though they lived like losers no matter if in a rundown trailer or in a nice part of San Dimas or Orange County, these "3" were all I had at that time and seemed to me is what I deserved. I let too many people walk over me and I finally put a stop to that. Finally realizing that I was someone of value, and that I had to stand up for myself. Though one of the guys that I really got along with was a Japanese
American (that for the life of me, can't remember how I met him) that I played guitar with, and often was invited over to his mom's for dinner.
But I started making new friends at the Comic Book store, shed my past skin and met 4 guys that would be new best friends, though the 4 never hung out together or met sadly. John, Anthony, Dave and Phil would be friends for our various interests, Anthony: Comics, Film and Star Wars (I am working on an essay about our friendship), Phil: because of Manga/Anime and Rush (and an early introduction to a young woman, who in later years would be my 1st true "girlfriend"), John: for Metal, comics and concerts and CD
collecting, and David: a metalhead of old school bands and power metal, concerts and because he seemed to not have too many friends with things in common (I believe in the early days used to hang with me and John). It was many years of fun, great conversations, concerts, conventions and laughs that gave me a break in my poverty. But it gave me HUGE amounts of hope. I also kept in contact with Chris who started his career in the early Video Game industry as a Conceptual Artist and early technology of 3D. And at this time, Tim went back home in Oklahoma and kept in touch by phone and hand written (funny) letters.
The owner of the comic store, Chris (I seem to meet a lot of Chris's and Tony's) was a great guy as well and I was invited many times to hang with his friends to watch TV on "Simpsons Nite". And a co-worker
(Dean) who came from the Abstract Art scene at the Pomona Art Colony who was (is) an incredible artist - haha, a bit full of himself (haha!), but became a good friend with a goofy sense of humor. He now is a
pretty famous colorist and illustrator in comics :).
To begin again.
As the years came and went, I had decided with some friends that we would go to the San Diego Comic Con, I was to drag my large portfolio with my strongest pieces to see if I could meet with various panels and see about getting a job, what kind? I had no idea. But it was really just to share my art with artists I admired. As I rearranged my portfolio outside the convention center after looking around (which I had forgotten "Dale" was watching this all go down)- a kindly short gentleman in his 50's, blonde hair, mustache and an "accent" that I thought was German, came up to ask "Is this your Art?" - I said yes and he asked if he could take a look, so he carefully turned page after page asking me questions; "Do you live in the area, how long have you been drawing?" And then the 2 questions that changed my life:
"Would you be willing to relocate? How much would you work for (as a Conceptual Designer? Who knows? I had no idea what he wanted me to do)?"
I answered; "Sure! Where?" He answered; "In the area", I then, as the world's biggest idiot in the universe said in reply to his second question; "How much would you ask for?" - "Ummm . . . I don't know . . . $9.00 an hour???". . . . Yes, I can see your face or hear your laughter.
Well, HE laughed as well and I replied; "I DON'T KNOW! . . . enough to have my own apartment!". He gave me his card and said call me next week and we'll talk more.
He turned out to be Argentinian, his name was Diego Angel of Angel Studios. They had been creating computer generated special effects (early CGI) and had worked on the film Lawnmower Man, and won an MTV Award for Peter Gabriel's video "Kiss that Frog". But were now developing Video Games in 1995.
Soon my friend John, my Mom and Brother of all people, would help me move boxes into a U-Haul truck and me and John were bound to my new home. And my 1st creative job making 32K. 1 of 2 jobs that would make my parents proud . . . finally.
Diego was like a father figure to me, a gracious and kind man who would give me my first break in the industry who wanted me to grow, and later "spread my wings" to bigger and better things when he felt my talents were being wasted and not recognized by his managers. But I must confess, that I was green. I was "afraid" to learn photoshop, why, I don't know since becoming pretty efficient a few years later. But I was still a geek in a world that I needed to mature, "grow up" and realize the potential I had.
Angel (who indeed, as he was in my life) gave me an opportunity to live on my own, and in a HUGE apartment in Vista California, and commuted to beautiful Carlsbad, and was able to take care of myself and enjoy life for my contract of 9 months, that seemed like a year or more.
Too bad I didn't appreciate the cities I lived, worked and ate at. Most of my friends at the time were in LA
county, so almost every weekend I went to visit them. But Encinitas & Leucadia were gorgeous cities I have come to appreciate all these years later, as me and "Dale" work at times around the cities ofSan Diego
county. Which I introduced him to "Karina's Taco Shop" (now being a patron since 1995) for their insanely flavorful Carne Asada Burritos, and both finding "Pannikin Coffee & Tea" for their insane Pies, Brownies and Cakes!
I was buying CD's at a local fave record store like an addiction, and paying bills on time. For the life of me I don't know why I didn't ask a particular blonde out who was a friend of the company secretary. She always talked to me and we'd kid around often, hanging at parties that Diego would have at his home. I guess I never felt good enough for anyone. Diego, having a bit too much to drink, wrapped his arms around me and said; "Tony, I love you like a Son, you are going to go places, I'm so glad you work for us" :). I was a bit shocked at that, though I know it was fueled a bit with tequila, he meant well, but it did make me feel better even though I was unsure of myself at the company.
Learned too that with the nice people I met and befriended (like the 2 outstanding Art Directors Daren and Chris that I worked with most of my days there), there was always that 1 guy that had to be an asshole to showup and give a hard time to demonstrate he was smarter than some green kid that came off the street that had no working experience, that the big boss "discovered". I thought we'd come to blows at the morning meetings but I was ready for it, but it never happened. Nevertheless I wasn't pulling my weight and looking back can totally understand now, their frustrations with me. But Diego called me into his office one day, I was in tears (I was really scared about what the future would bring) but he was like a father and a great comfort. He reassured me that I had a great future ahead of me and would write a glowing recommendation when I found the right studio to work with.
Because of that letter, my world would get a little better, with more experiences to work from . . .
Up and down in paradise . . .
A second chance of re-birth.
From there I moved in with my friend John (who helped me move to San Diego county) who was now living in Canoga Park in the "Valley" (San Fernando Valley) where I carefully lived on my savings. At this time I also lived relatively close to my dad's family and I called up my cousin Claudia whom I hadn't seen for years, now attending Medical School to be a Doctor. She grew up to be a very attractive young woman, good head on her shoulders and very personable and loved to laugh. When she was little though, she was such a brat! Haha - she didn't like me and my brother, and she'd take her toys and yell "MIO!!!" (Mine!) :D. We'd have lunches or dinner and hangout for a few hours here and there. It was nice to be close to other family members, it doesn't happen as much anymore sadly. But she is a Doctor now living in the upper midwest married with 2 kids, one of whom I just attended his Baptism a few months ago :).
I always felt I was imposing on my friend John, but he had always been a polite and friendly person, even though he didn't talk much. But his apartment and complex was a bit weird. They had security guards 24/7 and I wasn't supposed to be there (Guest rules etc.), and the 1 bathroom was in his room and he closed the door when he slept, and even if it was open, I didn't want to sneak into his room. So I had to sneak out of the complex with my Trail Bike through an emergency exit with his extra keys, go to the vacant lot and behind a tree to take a piss, wash my hands with the landscaping sprinklers and then I'd ride around the city in and out of patios, courtyards and malls around 12am and get some fresh air and exercise! It was actually fun! Sneak back in and go to sleep on the comfortable couch. Obviously I didn't want to live with my mom and my brother (or could) so I just wanted to fend for myself, living off my savings.
Each day I would apply to various Video Game Studios via "(Snail) Mail", make phone calls, and I had
connections with a few headhunters at a burgeoning Video Game staffing office. One thing lead to another when it looked like 2 agents set-up an interview with a new project from the creators of "Final Fantasy".
Square LA was located in beautiful Marina Del Rey on top of one of the Harbor Towers overlooking the harbour filled with yachts and sailboats of all sizes. After a few months of back and forth, I landed the job as a Conceptual Designer and with a small Art team, we designed the 1st 3 phases of "Parasite Eve".
One younger guy from Taiwan and a graduate from Cal Arts, "Eddie Linn" and a few weeks later, "Yongi"
(can't remember his last name) from Korea. Both kick ass artists to whom I could learn a lot from. Yet I
still was learning to be proficient at photoshop.
The weekend that I hooked up with my friend David to look for an apartment, we scanned the streets of Venice, not even an hour passed when I saw a For Rent sign at a House on a beautiful main street across from the homes on the Venice Canals in the city of Venice (the home has since been refurbished, lots
more foliage and a wooden fence was added, which is too bad. I loved seeing people walking to the beach as I set up my drawing table toward the street window), we turned back and entered the gate, and there were 2 tiny twin cottages in the same lot next to each other unoccupied with wood floors and a nice shaded yard. I called up the realtor right away from a nearby payphone and that day it was mine . . . for $900 a month! I was making $47K and life was good - FINALLY.
But again, I was very green, still a bit immature (I often say to people; "I have matured soo much now, since
. . . last week") and didn't know what I was capable of. I would be with Square LA for 9 to 10 months under my contract in 1997, could have looked into joining the team that would create the animated movie "Final Fantasy: The Spirit Within" in Honolulu and gained new experiences, but I had to ask, I wasn't invited. But I was much more interested in getting into the Film industry as it had always been my goal.
It was after my time there, that I would learn Photoshop by painting many of my personal drawings next door, with a neighbor that heard me blasting a particular Kansas song that was very obscure that he
recognized, soon we talked about art and music. He happened to be a musician and graphic artist, and he had 2 MAC's, one to compose music and the other to do art. He invited me to use it whenever he was home, often locking the doors behind me in the wee hours, I learned fast and to this day I am grateful for his generosity and opening his door to a new world that advanced my art skills.
Something to nothing . . .
This lead to a series of bad decisions, burning bridges because I was just too stupid (well, maybe more so ignorant or naive). Lost my little cabin, and a few months before that, my girlfriend Rachel, from her own heavy baggage that she was trying to get through, and me, not being able to advance in life. Taking on
freelance gigs not knowing my worth, getting ripped off, moving from place to place in Venice to Santa Monica taking on various jobs as a stocking clerk, at a Toy Store (where I met Director James Cameron, whom I should have asked for a job), until the bottom fell out and I was working part time at a local comic store and . . . homeless for a year and a half. Worked at another comic and
collectible store in the Valley, and eventually moved back to Santa Monica and worked as a salad bar
attendant at an Organic Grocery Store where I'd serve lots of commercial actors, musicians and movie
stars and local nut jobs (haha). I then landed a job at Tower Records, then another record store, to their wholesale business in Culver City and moved to nearby Westchester by LAX. Had more freelance gigs trying to find that place to shine and be content.
The end of the rope.
Fate can be rough, you can lose everything to a few mistakes and I found them.
The homeless part of my life is unbelievable when I think back, and all that I choose to remember. I didn't even tell my parents, I couldn't, I could not lay that on them, and I didn't want to go from one frying pan to another - so I was on my own and eating crow.
Again, hardly making ends meet, I lived with a guy from Moscow, who wasn't very handsome but had a way with the ladies, but annoying as hell. But I couldn't pay the rent there. Things got better as I lived at yet another boarding house in Venice, but soon after back to not being able to afford the rent. It came to a head when I had to put my stuff in storage yet again (somewhere during this time, I LOST my 1st storage unit that had 3 long boxes of cherished comics, magazines and anime/manga series, that I still think about). But this time, I had nowhere to go. The homeowners Son (who was in his 60's) let me stay in his truck camper overnight. I must've been scared for my life, and said prayers until I just fell asleep, until my watch alarm went off at 5am. Where I climbed out of the truck to my fate.
The only place I could think of going, with a roof, clean bathrooms and possibly get a few hours sleep was
(I just can't believe I went through this), the lobbies at "LAX" (Los Angeles International Airport). Keep in
mind this was pre-9/11. It was circa 1998 and I was living at the airport overnight, leaving at 6am, getting myself washed up, shaved and on my way to "Hi De Ho" Comics in Santa Monica.
I could very much relate to Chris Gardner in the film "The pursuit of Happyness", I found the right place where I could be safe to sleep away from the elements, found a place where I could wash my hair and feet daily without any harm or distractions. But to tell stories of all the things that I went through, nice people, crazies, odd situations, former co-workers flaking, how I kept from going nuts to still having the
brain cells not to panhandle and work my way out this mess I got myself into would take another blog site to tell it all (though I hope one day to write a book about it) or it may sound like a "movie" and not reality, its that tale people tell to make their life seem more "interesting" - its like looking at another person and asking how did you survive, and maybe thinking; is this guy making it all up? How did you get through it all and not "look" homeless and get interviews for jobs?
Luckily too, my newer storage unit (where most of my money went) was next to a laundromat so my clothes were always clean. No one knew I was homeless unless I told anyone, which I told few, who were nice enough to buy a meal, or give me a place to stay and wash-up, shower and clear my head. I had learned to keep my mouth shut, because others showed their true colors and it was humiliating (stories for another time). If it was the kindness of strangers, new friends I worked with (thank you Lori and your late father for the meals and conversations) and/or the faith I clinged to and saved me from the brink. It was a long road to get back on my feet. Sometimes I saved up for a Motel room so I could shower, even though it was in a questionable part of town, I got a goodnight sleep and was cleaned-up and didn't feel grimy and
disgusting. All those things that normal people take for granted.
I can remember once, walking down a part of Santa Monica where I would work a year later, a group of people I recognized from Square LA (they were sort of the "Cool Clique" of the company of young folks that were probably bringing in 80K+) who also recognized me. They had that surprised look like "its been so long!" but one of the guys asked "How are you doin'!?" - it was a mistake to actually tell them in a short but crammed history. I could see all of them getting uncomfortable and I shrank. They said their goodbyes hurriedly much like okay we gotta' go now, and walked briskly away.
From there and the comic book store (a former co-worker at a Toy store got me the connection), I joined another comic store in the Valley (a HUGE one at that). The owner of it, a young black entrepreneur who had me manage the Comic Book section. I was assigned help from 3 kids, one had an anxiety disorder (later, his parents would tell me; "You know, his councilors have a hard time working with him, but you seemed to get along well with him and he has progressed tremendously - thank you!" :D it wasn't easy, but through my own trials I was firm but compassionate) and 2 spoiled rotten girls that I showed the value of being
respectful, doing the tasks at hand, and early on taking them outside after complaining about "dusting the comics" that when they get older, they will deal with MUCH more harder asshole Bosses than me - they soon were content in their work. But they didn't stay for long of course.
I slept under bleachers that were built in one of the rooms and found foam cushions to lie on (the place used to be a "Laser Tag" business). And soon after, what used to be a security video room for the previous store, I used as my private bedroom). But found that a rather tall and angry black guy also wanted it -
though I had worked longer for the store and out "ranked" him, he complained a lot to the boss and hardly did anything. Because of this I thought we would come close to fighting. (Again) It never happened. Always seems like "close calls" but I guess someone was always watching over me.
But during staff meetings, this is where the true colors came out. Much of the staff was black, but the truth would come out when they talked about how they were treated in the world, yet they pleasantly helped (it seemed) many kids and families of various ethnicities and they would bring up topics that had nothing to do with the business at hand. I can remember one rather large guy railing on about "Why do we need White folks to help us in our cause!? And white people this, and white people that - As this young super friendly caucasian male about 19 or 20, who was a manager of Card Games sat there in complete silence, hands in his lap, with this look of what the hell am I doing here? Can I get up and leave? What was he supposed to think while the dude ranting on?
I also belonged to a group of artists that were painting murals on the walls and floors on the graveyard shift when the store was closed and everyone was away (the owner always worked late). We were made up of
caucasian, latino, black and asian artists, talking about our lives, bonding with our "plight", painting and laughing (one of the artists who was Korean, looked like a wandering "Ronin" with his backpack and an
actual Samurai Sword with its scabbard strapped to his bag!). It was the 1 thing that was fun in my life at
that time.
Also, for some reason, was the best time with my "Ex" girlfriend as she would visit when she could, I had a terrible crush on her still and tried to convey that but I was in no position to have her that way in my life. But she was there to make me feel better and take my mind off of things, and I was grateful for that.
Thinking back, its so odd that she took time out for me, but 5 years down the road would treat me like dirt, what the heck happened?
The person who got me the job in the store started talking behind my back to the manager for reasons that were never quite clear, and claimed that I wasn't doing my job and had not been able to finish a particular mural - which is hilarious because he himself left a HUGE mural above the Anime section of the store
unfinished for 2 months, as well, after I was let go.
. . . Now what?
A blessing of a curse.
It was then a co-worker surprised me and offered a place to live because he thought the owner would try to stick me with some offense if I still hung around there. Thinking this was kindness from a friend, I took his offer and his fiance', who I thought was very sweet. They lived in a Studio Apartment in a sketchy part of Canoga Park. I slept on their couch while I looked for a job out of town.
As I looked for work back in Santa Monica, I soon discovered that the "sweet" young woman was verbally abusive to her 7 year old daughter everyday :(. She yelled at her for various reasons, one of them being she had the responsibility to wake her boyfriend and herself when the alarm went off to get ready for school - they all slept in the same mattress on the floor and the 2 slept like dead wood. The insults would get soo bad (as the friend would LAUGH at the girl - ironically enough, her name was Vanessa and reminds me of this song), it took all my might not to get up and beat the shit out of them as I wept under my blanket, as they thought I slept through it all. But if I did anything, where then would that little girl go? :(
I also watched 2 of their cats DIE, one in my arms because they must've gotten some sort of food poisoning as their kitchen was filthy (the 1st cat I had to take to a vet via-Bus). It was awful :(.
I had that to cntend with along with my guilt of not being able to do nothing, and these monsters did not
give me a key to open the main gate, so I had to climb a wall and banisters to get in, then "sneak in" while
they slept, or, if I couldn't stand being there, tuck my tail between my legs and sleep in a airline terminal at
LAX. But I did what I had to, to get out of this situation and get to that better place.
I finally made my way out - I had gotten a job at a Santa Monica Organic Food Market (where I became that Salad Bar/prep) and left an angry, stern letter to the Mother about the way she and her boyfriend treated her daughter to instill the fear of God into her, telling them I could have EASILY called the Dept. of Social Services on her. I ended the letter; "Would you rather see fear or love in your daughter's eyes?"
Locked the door behind me and off I went to a new roommate situation in Santa Monica and another new phase in life.
. . . from there, the Organic Market had many shoppers that were famous celebs from Film, Music, and
commercial actors that I'd talk with on a regular basis (including the actor Noah Emmerich, before he really hit it big in major movie roles and the TV Series "The Americans") and local and international gorgeous women (while I was in a stained apron and cap), a new roommate situation, walking distance in Santa Monica. And then having enough of the food industry and the "crazies" that came into the store. Moving on to Tower Records as a clerk with a very diverse staff of people from all walks of life, and for the most
part all getting along (we had a eclectic mix of people who specialized in various musics other than pop, for one of the smaller stores it made us very unique. 3 of us were into Metal and Progressive music too, so that was very cool, while 5 of us also enjoyed Classical and Jazz/Fusion). I then became a data-entry clerk, then the Display Artist which was nice to use my skills in new ways, which was always a challenge but it was fun and made the time go by faster, but the pay was awful, and the store manager was a pain in the ass. I had won 5 regional awards for Best Displays, but HE would take the "hard prizes" (like tickets to a show, electronic prizes, etc.), but at the very least I'd get a cash prize. I always had my advertising up on time but
he pushed and added too much unnecessary pressure. Our store looked unique, and my displays gave it character
In 2002 I left for a better salary at Record Surplus in West LA as a stock clerk, then stocking/shipping &
receiving at their sister distribution company Leftcoast Marketing near LAX, where I moved to with 2 other roommates, for 5 years.
I landed a freelance contract gig for a friend of a friend (Phil) that didn't workout, and where my
friendship ended with my "Ex" (she was friends with my co-worker and boss, who was a former boyfriend as well) from behavior that had changed all the sudden, I was sick of it and just let her fade off (or the other F word, never failed, when things seemed to move forward, other things made me feel worthless).
I came back to Leftcoast Marketing's new location in Culver City near the Sony Studios, and then a couple of years later, an offer from a former co-worker that I worked with at the warehouse who worked for a
famous female Pin-Up Artist that he had NO CLUE for 2 years who she was until I guessed and told him
who he was employed by :p ("Olivia"). And was hired as a S&R clerk at her GORGEOUS home (in their
converted garage) in Malibu. I was paid pretty well there but spent too much time and money by public
transportation commuting from my new home/roommate situation in Claremont to Malibu everyday (5 to 6 hour trips one way - depending on traffic). It was getting way too expensive to live in Venice/Santa
Monica (this has a longer story as well - AGH! so many stories) and no way could I afford Malibu, so I
endured the commute. I'd see a lot of cities back in those days.
More freelance gigs and 9 to 5 jobs that were the worst jobs I ever had, and gaining wonderful back,
shoulder and neck pains that come and go throughout my life (and now Carpal Tunnel Syndrome on my right arm). Somehow I trudge through it all, grin and bare it. And hear those voices throughout - people suggesting what to do with my life and being tired of explaining my physical pains limiting what jobs I
could do, and my "Mathematical Dyslexia" and the same old comments and questions when I apply for regular jobs: Why are there gaps in your resume? You are way overqualified for this job, You haven't done this type of work in a long time (why should we hire you?) etc. etc.
I even tried for 5+ years to work at the Amoeba Music store in Hollywood by contacting friends, former co-workers at Tower Records and regularly contacting the hiring manager, by email, phone and coming into the store (I even sent a "Comic Resume" to all 3 stores in California), reapplying every month (for 5 years). I just stopped after all that time, what was the use. Oh well . . . I just don't seem to fit in.
But I couldn't let that stop me, I had to keep looking for that place I belonged.
Regrets and mistakes . . .
All the years of being alone, (remembering now) all the dates I've gone on that went nowhere and were
strange or they screwed with my head, and having this HUGE love to give - it seemed unnatural to be alone.
All the struggles, the pain, the tears, the prayers, the blessings and the hopelessness, anger, bitterness
to hope, laughs and keeping it together - with those friends that helped me get through it all. To the ones that stayed, and those that faded away. They all saved my life in some way or another.
Lived to see my Mother give sympathy to my Father in his last years of life, invite him over for holidays, until he died in 2006 of Rheumatoid Arthritis that twisted and mangled his body, with his facial expression on that gurney as if he was screaming out for mercy! Where was I? I didn't even get to hold his hand when he died. All twisted and gnarled up (though as long as he could, drove his Chevy Blazer till the end with gnarled fingers). I cried and drowned that morgue in my tears as my hand was on his chest reliving all the regrets, all the curses and pain, all the love I held for him, but it was too late to tell him . . .
When my father passed away
I didn't get to tell him
All the things I had to say
I just wish I could have told him in the living years"
- Mike + The Mechanics/"In the Living Years"
But I had some comfort that he started reading the Bible, as if to prepare himself, maybe make amends.
Since his death in 2006, I have lost 4 friends, including my comic book friend Anthony, my brothers best friend Michael. My good friend's wife to breast cancer (sadly to lose him to the weight of war when he
came home from Iraq/Mosul diagnosed with PTSD) and many years later, after the situations to come
below, my former fiancée's Brother, friend and compatriot in music, lost his life suddenly to heart
complications. Too many, all too young, all having much more to experience and give to the world.
Whatever guilt, shame and amends I've had to make to people in my life, and "yet" to make will be a
process I need to attend to when I have the means to do so. All the crap I've gone through from all over Southern California, to the Peninsula of Washington for a month with an Aunt, such a deeply experienced but harrowing journey to finding myself, my deeper relationship to Christ (please atheist friends, don't run because I believe in a "Sky Daddy", because I'm not running from you), the ups and downs of success to the woman I still love more deeply than anything I ever known could exist (note: was written in 2016), other than Christ who never let me down to miracles most will never understand. I thought this was finally the gift I had wanted all my adult life. I still ask why am I still here, and what's ahead, and will I be able to
enjoy my life and be happy after all I've experienced. I always think it maybe "too late" when success
comes my way. Too old to "enjoy" the good fortune, but we'll see if it even comes when I'm young enough to enjoy it. I'm trying to be more optimistic.
I have many regrets, and I have a long way to be the man I've always wanted to be. A provider like my
Father, someone who just does it without excuses. But, everything crumbles away even when you don't
have anything, and why should I be surprised that everything to come falls apart if I don't take courage
and do what I'm supposed to, to get out of this situation. Time waits for no one.
Forward to regress.
There was a point that I had nowhere to go, and I didn't want to regress to homelessness again, so I had to beg my Mom and Brother to stay with them, while I worked. From far away jobs to local minimum wage jobs. But it was awful, in my late 40's and treated like a 10 year old. My self-esteem was being destroyed little by little, day to day. I had to deal with my mother's moods and intense anger, and the grumpiness and temper of my brother. Working 9 to 5 jobs and freelance gigs, again, it was never enough for my mom (the Art gigs; "Those aren't real jobs!"). Even though I bought my own food, or was offered food from my Mom (which I took smaller portions so that I wouldn't take advantage of my brothers share), kept things clean and did chores when needed. As well as take care of the Corgi's that I love immensely. But I was going a bit nuts, all these terrible decisions I was making. When was it all going to get better?
Out of the blue.
I answered an ad in Craigslist, and to my surprise I got an interview, and it all felt right to me. I landed
another Contract gig, this time in Burbank, which I really thought I was getting along well with the staff, but I had this nagging feeling about the 2 guys that hired me, their combined age was still younger and less experienced than I was by then. Now realizing that they had never worked on a Video Game or managing a staff (The company they worked under was a Animation Studio, and somehow the 2 guys managed to start up a Gaming side-project), and they were going about the work in a manner that wasn't being conducive to the creative potential it could have, or letting the concepts have details on how it all works.
Their communication showed their lack of experience. But I did whatever was asked of me with no
question, and one of the artists that mostly did environments was really snotty to me, I don't really know why. At the meetings every week in studio and on-line (We met once a week and worked remotely) I
complimented him often, even though he said nothing about my art, I let it go because obviously the guys liked my designs and this man painted and embellished them. No problem.
I was commuting from my Mom's home at this time and was desperate to get out, but I had enough saved for a studio apartment in Pasadena. On the day I was to have my internet installed at the apartment, I was almost out the door, when my mother's house phone rang. There was a message from my supervisor.
An ominous feeling flushed over me - I called back, and in the tone of his voice I knew it was over. He kept saying "You interviewed well, but you're not supplying enough work, and you were making details on things we don't need" (When you are a Concept Designer, you work out details on objects that may be needed for the animators/3D artists to know "how they work", its part and parcel with designing, but these guys didn't let me know to not do that). I was so furious but within the anger I kept from exploding on the phone as I asked useless questions in gritted teeth. The last thing I said was;
"I JUST put a down payment on a new apartment, where I could be closer to the studio . . . what am I going to do now?" - He replied:
(I can remember hearing Charles Dickens in my head)
going through the obstacles of life. Just you and the sky is falling and crushing you.
I had a short time of complete freedom, but gigs were not coming in, and I was just gaining my confidence with a local gig, but I was a bit lost on how to sell myself, I don't know really why, lack of confidence is all I can think of because I had plenty in my portfolio to convey I was a perfect match for anyone needing high concepts or storyboards for any director.
But I was lost, I made myself feel completely helpless, scared of the unknown. I defeated my will and
abilities and hid underneath the covers. Many days I hid from the daylight and woke and walked through
the city under the lamplights, looking for something. A thought of opportunity that I could find courage to
hold tightly in my hand. It wasn't out there, I couldn't see it, my defeatism wouldn't let me grasp it. I let it
get the best of me.
About a year later, after talking with an Aunt who used to be my favorite (when she lived in Anaheim Calif., and then in Louisiana and later, San Clemente California, she used to supply paper and pencils to draw on my visits), and telling her of my plight, she had invited me to stay with her at any point that I needed to. I stayed as long as I could in that studio apartment till I had nowhere else to go.
Well life came to a head, and I asked if the offer still stood, in-which my mom gave a warning that she was a little nuts living on her own (and my Mom didn't like her "Christian" preaching). But I really had
nowhere else to turn, and thought maybe I could get a job and make a brand new start. Living with an Aunt, who was secluded all alone along the peninsula of Washington off of Puget Sound, I found that she was
"nuts" and the "offer" started to change when I arrived, that I could only stay for a month, but I hoped to find a job of any kind and find my own way, maybe make a new life there and start over.
Her "Christian" personality was too high and mighty, to where she never thought she was wrong. This is not the compassion and patients that I personally knew of Christ or the previous life of one of my fave Aunts. And other odd behavior and things she would say were all red flags that it began to be harder and harder to communicate with her on everyday conversation.
But I was miles from any type of public transportation, it was a gorgeous area, but very secluded, and the end of May was coming too soon.
During this time, more bad news came; I lost my 2nd Storage Unit, but this one was full of all my trade
magazines of music (mostly Metal and Progressive Rock), with cover stories of Rush, Rainbow and its
members, Tour shirts and Tour Programs, and posters, many of "Ritchie Blackmore" and "Rush" :(. I had
to keep my head together about that because I was already dealing with too much. Oddly enough, I received
a check from the storage unit, but didn't understand why. Further investigating, it was required of the
storage unit (by law), if a "bid" was made for a unit, the renter would receive the excess subtotal of the
"bid" - I got $700.00, when I was running out of money living in Washington. It was the definition of a
"Mixed Blessing" that saved me. But to this day, I think of those 2 storage unit losses, they were not just
"stuff", they were a part of me, a part of my life I enjoyed of memories I can never replace.
After dealing with some strange behavior and arguments from left-field, I had to leave as soon as possible. I called my Mom to tell her what she had previously warned me about, she told me "leave son, and come
home". But it was yet another from the pan to the fire. I just couldn't believe it could get worse. Was I losing my sanity on the years of bad decisions, or was I keeping it all together through all the adversity? All I knew was, I didn't deserve this. But I had to do something about it.
I had to get out and find my way . . . .
Chapter XIII ~ Epilogue:
Where do I go from there . . .
How I stay sane through all this, looking outside-in, astounds me that I haven't jumped out of a window or stepped in-front of a train! How do I keep my sense of humor and hope? Habit? Osmosis? The will to live and to see what's around the bend? (the month spent with my aunt that was a combination of the beauty of Washington, and the madness of isolation and projecting their craziness on me - the longer story for another time . . . and then back to Mom . . . I can't believe it all).
Pasadena, along with Venice, was another fave place to live. Everything was walking distances away, both places taking midnight strolls (or bike rides, taking the bike over my shoulders across the Venice sands and sitting on a lifeguard tower watching the tide come in under the moon sparkling on the water) and feeling content. I try and try to make things work, but what else can I do, give up?
Not once in my later life did I blame someone else for my plight. I never blamed the government, the system, a race, a creed, a belief/non-belief. I may dwell upon my parents on how I was raised but it made me who I am, it did not make me take vengeance against the world but made me more idealistic, polite, ethical, principled, caring, nurturing, loving, understanding, balanced.
Though I never had children (I wanted kids when I was 21), never found that kind of love till later in life - had to endure all this on my own which is probably best, I can't be careless enough to think I could have raised children in such a life. Though I think the "Velasquez Curse" needed to end. No more burdens and anger in this branch of the family tree. No more black sheeps, like my father thought of himself and how I look at that person in the mirror, a "Crow". Nobody else's fault, except for the person staring back. I'd probably fuck-up kids anyway :p.
How is it that it all hasn't aged me that much, a few strands of hair turning salt and pepper around me. Though the body inside is starting to feel its ills - I'm alive. I don't look 54, but I feel it when I get out of a car :P.
Maybe stalled for the deep chasm of sadness I have felt for many reasons of late, and another phase of a creative "funk" I'm in. I still can't do nothing else but create art, write about music and have ambition and compelled for a new escape, a new future within a state and a country that is suffering from the inside out. I can't blame my career and profession on any government, leader or economy. It's all within the industry. Those who have devalued the artist, and those that devalue themselves and provide too much work for less money, driving the rates down and those taking advantage of those artists for as high as the market will bear. Production artists have a whole other can of worms to deal with, than other people and political leaders and ideologies (except maybe a growing "P.C. Culture" in the workplace), its an entity unto itself. Now having to wear different hats to even qualify at most studios.
But I still feel its in me, I have to get out of this town (where I have been for the past 5+ years, this "Cultural Vacuum"), and this feeling of hopelessness and find my own strength again on my own initiative. I need to write my own "story" and find hope once again.
I have had soo many different kinds of job experiences under my belt now, 25 years of warehouse/shipping
& receiving, all those years of odd jobs of all sorts, left me with shoulder, neck and back pains (as I sit here now feeling some of those aches), that I've had to work through and live with for the past 20 years.
In-between freelance and contract gigs for indie type projects, many were awesome experiences, some were difficult, some were awful with people that had no idea what they wanted or what they were doing, and 2 "Anthony's" that were SUPER easy to work with as creative Directors/Writers, and small studios that knew how to treat their employees.
And here I am still working part time as a "Organic Carpet Cleaner" hardly making ends meet, and stuck in a town where I don't do anything in, I haven't even memorized my address in these past 5+ years. I feel isolated, in a box. Time ticking away . . .
Be grateful for the roof and living thru a nightmare . . .
In that time in this home, I lived with a much older roommate, his "health" issues, odd habits and other
daily things that most don't deal with - But, I have been truly "Blessed" with a roof over my head, and its
because of my friend Dale, with all his oddities and goofiness, he is one of the most honest people I've ever
met, and very patient person to a fault. We talk about our faith, politics and madness surrounding us, and people that are at odds with each other in these times, and trying to find our own sanity (under pressure, or duress from family members, or just our own doubts) while pursuing our dreams and ambitions to live a new life of prosperity with our art skills. It was Dale at the last minute that he reached out to a fellow "Brother" of his church to have me in his home 5-6 years ago.
The unfortunate part for a time, this was sort of a "Halfway House" for strays. People who were trying to clean up their lives, and getting help from the homeowners church. But they took advantage of his graces. He's also a saintly person who only wanted to help people in need, but many took advantage of his help and demeanor to extremes. Maybe - I too have taken advantage of him since living here. But I scrape by, try to help out when I am able, and to be respectful of him, the house, keeping it clean and being a good guest. The other "3" that had lived here were not so respectful, and I'd hear their opinions behind closed doors and the homeowners back. They did not clean up after each themselves, and it was a burden for me to know they were outside my door. I couldn't trust them as far as I could throw them, and always worried about my "things" while I was away working (which none of them were employed).
Eventually all had left for various reasons, but 1 stayed the longest. Brian was a jolly fellow at first, he had TALL stories, which you never knew what was real or to prop himself up. He tried looking for work to keep his motorcycle maintained and for fuel to "go looking" for jobs, but in the end I think he just gave up. He butted heads with the homeowner, talked back a lot, even went out on a few jobs with Dale when I had freelance gigs. But he'd endlessly complain to Dale about the homeowner, but to the end that he wasn't grateful for the charity of having him here. He took all the blessings for granted, and even Dale, with his stone-like patients had to tell him of how blessed he was to have a home, a bed and food that he could afford.
Later though, his hope and self-esteem was diminishing, he lashed out more to the homeowner, blaming
the world for his ills instead of himself. He started drinking again, seeing cans of beer in the recycling bin,
and it was forbidden in the house to drink, he didn't care. Because of this he worked odd-jobs less and less.
It was then he was kicked out of his room for another roommate that came in. Brian went to the couch and
the new tenant moved into his room. He was "odd", right off the bat the hairs stood in the back of my neck.
He was a hippy type, with many guitars and odd conversations. But Brian hated him, for taking his room and the odd behavior as well. Months later it came to a head, Brian threatening him, and it started to
become a bigger nightmare in the house. Lots of arguing, then silence, both trying to avoid each other, then it got even worse. Both were telling everyone behind close doors that the other was manipulating the homeowner, as he was both confused, but also in on what they were trying to do. It was a good thing that their church knew all about me, my demeanor and honesty with Dale, and that I was a hard worker just
trying to get ahead so I could "move on" and live my life. This place was never "home", just a place to lay
my head, and try to tackle my day to day life. It wasn't a rose garden or a party, and I was miserable because of all this going on. The newer roommate finally was forced to find another place (much more to this story, but that's for the "book").
But Brian became even WORSE, his hope was gone now, he left the living room and couch a complete mess, and it was then I first saw the "meth pipe". I warned the homeowner about it, but he was intimidated by him, though he never wanted to admit it (He is in his 70's, but in great shape, he rides a motorcycle and does a lot of heavy lifting and gardening). They got into yelling matches, Brian making "threats", talking loudly on the phone with an estranged girlfriend that he'd YELL at when she came for a few visits (who I met and was already dealing with "cancer" and living with a family of Police Officers that warned her about Brian, which she refused to face).
He then started to lose his teeth! Stupidly, he had them all removed but didn't go back to have them replaced. I think this is when his mind "cracked", he wasn't the jolly, smiling joking person anymore. He
went from a 56 year old to a 80 year old, emaciated from the meth and hopelessness. He not only was threatening the homeowner but now me from time to time, and then threatened me with a steaknife, but Paul getting in front of him calmly and taking it away from him. So now I had to contend with the thought I'd be that person I feared would go beserk one day. Police were called about "7 times" at this home, I felt like "White Trash" living here in this town, like the "Lake Bottom People" that many at their church deal with in trailer parks and sketchy neighborhoods, and the criminal element s that live around here under people's noses in the better neighborhood suburbs.
Not only did I worry about my stuff when I was working, the jobs that were becoming less and less with Dale, being able to pay for my storage and paying the homeowner what I could - I had to worry about the maniac outside my door and the safety of the homeowner. And . . . the "sweet" Chihuahua "Buddy" that
also was living through this nightmare of an owner (Brian's dog) that he also loved very much, but was in no condition to take care of. I loved that dog, and has a bigger sad story but that's for another time :(.
One day it finally came to a head, I awoke to him yelling at "someone" at 6am before I had to go to work
later. I had thought he was yelling at the homeowner, and I YELLED OUT "Whats the hell is going on!?" . . .
He ran up to me at the room of my door, apparently he was yelling at his girlfriend on the phone, and he made crazy claims to his girl of what I was doing (she knew me, and knew he was losing it). He then put the phone down and felt "threatened", so he pulled his knife out on me and touched the tip of it aggressively to either side of the hallway walls, and then to my face, mumbling threats. Honestly, my mind went blank for a bit . . .
All I can remember thinking calmly; "He's pulled a knife on me....". He then threw the knife "behind" him,
stuck out his arm straight to my chest with a fist, as if to threaten me to "do something", he then ran his
fist in my chest, which I believe I slapped away. He then either threw a punch that connected to my face or body . . . . and I lost it. I remember saying to myself; "Don't punch or kick him, because I will beat the shit
out of him" . . . I got him in a headlock, and he felt like 25 pounds of skin and bone, but again, I said to
myself; "Slam his head into the walls", which I did back and forth. Bloodied, he dragged me as I had him in the headlock to the den of the house. The homeowner FINALLY came out of his bedroom as I YELLED out at the top of my lungs "CALL THE POLICE!!!", as he fumbled the phone nervously calling. It took the f'n police (this town really blows) 45 minutes to get here, I had lost my breath and strength to hold Brian, and he was trying to yell to the homeowner; "Help Me!". He then regained strength, went to the adjacent kitchen and grabbed a fork to attack me and again, the homeowner got in his way and took it away from him, as I ran to my room to call the police yet again.
Finally the police came, I was shaking, never have I been in such a situation, but I hated the questions and manner in which I was asked about the situation (I get it, the town has bad elements, and who knows who "I" am in all this). Seemed I got the "bad cop" as Brian got the "good cop" while Brian ranted and raved about me, the homeowner, him being a "Lawyer" and knowing the law etc. etc. while the cop sarcastically mocked him.
Somehow through all that I got "Buddy" who was barking at us, and tossed him in the homeowners office and closed the door. I'm "reliving" this as I write (sigh), lots of details I'm leaving out but all the cops could do is keep him overnight for a misdemeanor, no matter his "record" (Thanks Jerry Brown!).
Long story short, months (MONTHS) later, the homeowner had been talking to the City County Council, and relaying all that was going on, in which they claimed that this was one of the worst cases they have ever dealt with (including all the efforts in the past weeks to kick him out).
While I was asleep one day, I heard a knock, and as soon as he opened the door and the homeowner came out, Police under a warrant they told him to take all he could carry and was thrown out of the house with a restraining order . . . FINALLY. The saddest part was Brian took "Buddy" with him, and has a heartbreaking story to go with it months later :'(.
All this WHILE, I had a "financée", from a long distant relationship where we tried to see each other when we could in our troubled lives. Even though (as I thought) we were VERY much in love, for 3 years, it was all not very conducive for a relationship to last, dealing with this lifestyle and a job that just made-ends meet. I was trying to get more Freelance Gigs but for other reasons as well, I just wasn't pulling my weight, wasn't moving forward. And to relay these situations to her on the phone at a great distance, when she already had enough on her own plate, eventually, and after a job situation of her own, she "pushed me away", and our relationship would just "fade away", to a long and arduous heartbreak. Not giving it an "end" but my heart dragging in silence with no clear sign of that it was over (so I made myself believe). But, after a year, it took a friend (Chris) to give me a slap of reality; "How could you expect to have a relationship with THAT happening and putting her through all that worry!?".
He was right, it was a kick to the gut, as much as the breakup, but it was the truth, a very harsh truth. I
failed her, and failed myself, and I have lived with these regrets and depression ever since. Nobody's fault
but my own. Give Chris a prize for the obvious, and make me a real winner. It's the biggest regret of my life losing her, because she trusted in me, that I'd take care of us both.
Trying to be the "cornerstone" . . .
I have tried to make connections, but not at the pace or confidence that I should, and I have been in a
creative funk for 2-3 years now. Where there was a time I'd have a couple of months, and then full steam
ahead drawing till the wee hours, not anymore. All this "loss", heartbreak, and self-doubt, isolation and
lack of independence has drained me. I live day to day, hand to mouth and now have this pesimism about
humanity, "homeless" people and their reasoning for being there, and where we are as a society. And the hate I have of this damned city I live in, and when, how and where I will finally make that escape.
Me and Dale try to network as much as we can, meeting interesting creatives on our job, that have had connections from their past, or current lives in their respective professions.
But, we have met super interesting people of late, and hopefully (with positive thoughts, prayers, and keeping in touch regularly) by the time you read this, I may have landed a gig/job with people in the Film and TV industry we met on the job in their home. As it goes, you never know who you'll meet on this job and its all about networking in this biz, and maybe I finally made a connection at the right place and right time. But I've been through it before, don't want to count my chickens yet. But I do hope the door will be open for me again, and live the 2nd half of my life blessed with doing what I was born to do after all these life experiences, all the heartache and disappointment, and those moments of hope that kept me going. It's been a very rough journey, but its made me who I am, all of it.
But I have to remember all that I have gone through has given me knowledge, strength, kindness from strangers and important lessons/wise words to live by, to endure and share that kindness, to pass it on and never take for granted the "good things" that have also happened. To forgive, to make amends to those that I need to remend bridges burned, and maybe even to those that set them on fire. I need to remember
the humanity, humbleness, humility and respect I expected from others, to give it back . . . .
"Hold tight to yourself, Don't let nobody give you hell
Your life is sacred, Live it right, but live it your way
This is what I believe in . . ."
- Adrian Belew/"What I Believe"
Fight on, and never surrender . . .
take self-responsibility, to be a better person, work hard at attaining your dreams in the here and now, and sharing your compassion and the best of you to all who are open enough to accept you for who you are.
But YOU need to be open to their way of life too, as much as you can be. None of us are perfect, we are
flawed and have things we need to work on, but we can find common ground to start on, and at least try to
accept our differences and live with each other.
Freedom is not free. Freedom takes time, work and effort. It's in the pursuit of happiness that we have the freedom to be what we want no matter what the government is doing to undermine us. We can NOT let
others judge or persecute us when THEY work for us. We have the freedom to be poor and live in dangerous neighborhoods, or escape on our own will and determination and make something better of ourselves.
We can not blame the past but live TODAY and make ourselves better than anyone that tries to tear or keep us down. WE as an individual have the right and obligation to pick ourselves up from the dirt and rise above it no matter who or what we are or what anyone else perceives ourselves to be!
It may take time, it may take more effort than we think we have in our moments of self-doubt, crises and loss of faith, but we must move forward, if we are on the brink, on the edge of the cliff, we must find
courage to take the leap, and not step back into the past . . . I'm trying.
Life is HARD, and its up to each of us to do the BEST we can to make a good, happy and honest life . . .
https://youtu.be/oU5gasRxYdU
A Discussion . . .
| https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLsUk50XkVcCm6sd0AQFUJOZNgCIQeSVmf |
Chapter 2: In Pursuit . . .
https://www.archives.gov/founding-docs/declaration-transcript
WE make the rules and we will write them. This does NOT mean that we lash out at those that have nothing to do with our free will, no one is oppressing us enough where we can't pick ourselves off and wipe the blood and sweat away and leave those who would harm, abuse and berate us - WE are bigger than that, we can make our way without falling down to their level, without compromise, without fear, ignorance, violence, hatred and strive to be bigger and better than that! YOU can be whatever you want to be without using or stepping on those that have nothing to do with who YOU ARE. Make yourself a better human being by treading the way of goodness, kindness, politeness, fair play, team playing and embrace the goodness of others because no matter what we believe, no matter the color of our skin and whatever oppressive life we come from, judge by the content of our character. Do not give into the hate because it blinds you, it keeps you in fear and ignorance and you'll blame others for your plight instead of focusing on what YOU can become - that you can be better than what THEY perceive.
You can write a new passage, you can tell your own story to better yourself, then help your community and help others grow and shed the skin of anger, fear and aggression that keeps us down and defiles us with its embittered rage keeping us wandering in the dark and killing ourselves and our hearts.
If you are to set things on fire, let the blaze of truth spark your awareness and fight for your soul! What does your conscious dictate to YOU to be righteous, to live with your brothers and sisters in this Republic like a city on the hill? WE are in this TOGETHER. WE are a melting pot of different cultures, thoughts and goals, but all within the American Dream to Live and prosper with each other, yet we can still share our cultures but adhere to the laws that are under one flag. Not separate because of colour or ideas, but in tolerance of opinion without one trying to silence the other in rage and hostility because THEY disagree or because your beliefs should hinder a person's freedom to look and live how they want, especially if they mean no harm by way of violence, force or oppression (be it by religion, faith or someone else's will). That is NOT what this country is about. Not this country on where it was when the Constitution was written, or the harrowing history on which many misinterpreted or twisted, and violence and hatred soiled every word - no, we are talking about the here and NOW.
Each one of us has a right to say what we need to say. But by no means does it give us the right to silence those words by force, anger, tyranny or oppression. That is NOT what this Republic stands for and if you want to rewrite its laws and make it "different", you have other places to go and experience how they live and possibly live under the ways you think is a better way of government. We are a Democracy of a Republic that is built on the fundamentals of our Constitution, or divided we stand, united we fall.
And there are various agenda's that try to silence YOUR voice for what "They" believe is for the common good. And if you can't see the wood for the trees, you won't see it coming when you finally realize that
your choices are gone:
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2DU3TBNutEdOoO7aZT7VFRKRC7rXQcyk
You have the freedom to make stupid life choices like me, or you can use all the above as a cautionary tale. Every opportunity is before you, and all you have is within you to make those steps, no one else but you. Find your freedom, but its not always free, but take responsibility and courage in both hands and do what you have to do to succeed, without having to hurt someone else along the way, do it right, with humility, strength, faith and purpose that is honorable and honest. No one is better or worse than you, just be YOU and strive to be the best, and I'll do my best to heed my own words . . .
- Second paragraph/The United States Declaration of Independence
- Christ/Matthew 7:4 & 5
Your sense of entitlement, not mine . . .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=us5clq8klhg
pre-Civil War Democrats and "Dixiecrats" who caused the strife and cruelty of men, women and children as "property", who were endowed by their creator by certain inalienable rights, for those reparations they demand from a race, that abolitionists, those that helped in the underground railroad, and those that walked with Martin Luther King Jr. that "they should overcome", and those that died to help their brothers and sisters as human beings. Will ANY of these people receive reparations as well? . . .
https://youtu.be/QAaiqFUUPBo
"When I meet cases, as I frequently do, of such unfortunate and misguided young men as I have described, I cannot but feel the most profound sympathy for them, because I know that they are not wholly to blame for their condition. I know that, in nine cases out of ten, they have gained the idea at some point in their career that, because they are Negroes, they are entitled to the special sympathy of the world, and they have thus got into the habit of relying on this sympathy rather than on their own efforts to make their way.”
― Booker T. Washington, My Larger Education
A storm on the horizon . . .
- Thomas Jefferson/1st draft - Declaration of Independence
There is a new pestilence sweeping across the nation when racism is something that should have been
destroyed long ago. But now, no race, belief, color is safe from it.
One race calls another privileged, meaning they have more opportunities to better themselves because the
colour of one's skin. Let's take those in government out of the equation that may have instigated these
beliefs to set a course for radical groups coming out of the woodwork in a time that looks ripe for the
picking in young minds to segregate instead of unify . . .
WHO created this privilege? Was it THEM or was it YOU that use this as an excuse to stop you from going
anywhere? Because those people have it all, you stop your ambitions to want more for yourself or your
community? Are you that weak, fragile and gullible to let "others" stop you from moving forward?
What has happened to self-responsibility? And to those stifling young impressionable minds with all the
negativity, destructive criticism and projective advice - what about "a positive frame of reference"?
"We'll be fighting in the streets, with our children at our feet, and the morals that they worship will be gone.
And the men who spurred us on, sit in judgement of all wrong, THEY decide and the shotgun sings the song"
- The Who/"Won't get fooled again"
I have dealt with racism in the South personally, so did my Father and my family (many others had it MUCH worse and more violent, but for us it was bad enough) - but did it dictate who WE were? Did we let that destroy us and give up? It gave us a vengeful will to destroy that grip and move forward. No one was going to hold us down and we were not going to blame others for not being where we want to be. That person is staring us in the mirror and asking WHY didn't you take the leap? I have no one to blame but myself in that regard. All the missed opportunities to better myself as that boat passed right on by when it had no time left to wait.
Racism is still alive and well, and it comes in all colors. But its not in my face anymore, you can see it in the comments under vids at YOUtube. Its rednecks to random people in life as well as minorities (that word, WHO is a minority now?) and trolls just wanting to get people pissed off because they think of themselves superior above all, have no life to speak of, or don't have anything creative to contribute to society because they themselves feel awkward, they can't socialize, they have been picked-on or messed with all their
lives, and maybe too - they are intellectual, but come off as arrogant and have no source of empathy, only superiority (this also includes "Bots" and "Sock Puppets" posing as real people to disrupt harmony, to
create chaos, and/or sell narratives and propaganda). And this can also come from radical groups and
those who socialize with the young and impressionable. Instead of encouraging to move forward and take charge of their lives, racism and bigotry is held up high and perpetuated to keep you down, to keep
reminding you that YOU are a victim, you can't move forward because "someone" is preventing you to live
the life you want? Its THEY who are endlessly persecuting you . . .
indeed, who are "THEY"?
Those that wanted to change what the country stood for - instead of fighting to keep those in power
principled and accountable for taking advantage of the Constitution, sought to want to change the
Constitution itself thinking that a Socialist Utopia was a way to make everyone equal, yet did not want to
see or hear what was happening in Socialist and Communist countries, or even tyrannical or fascists
nations and how people actually lived in such governments. Nobody was equal and those with the power
changed the rules when they wanted. If one socialist leader was wrong, eliminate their way of socialism
and their followers until they get it right. So when was it ever right? When will they ever get it right?
So these anti-establishment/hippies/counter culture students become teachers and professors, and now
teach our children to hate everything "America" stands for or built upon, instead of telling them THEY can make a difference and keeping those in the government accountable for their actions.
In its stead, it IS America's fault, YOU are part of it and YOU should be ashamed of YOURSELVES, because WE
left you this mess, we couldn't clean it up so go out there and protest everything because its ALL wrong.
So now you have an opportunity to blame the establishment, blame the "White" people because they
are privileged. They are EVIL and have taken advantage of your brothers and sisters, to keep them down,
keep them segregated, poor and filled with crime, violence and despair . . . .
Face who we ARE.
Um, I come from a culture that has been violent, corrupt and power hungry before they left the shores of Spain, Portugal and Italy to sail to new lands (and protecting themselves from invasion). Before the birth of Jesus Christ, and going across the Americas, landing in "New Spain" and the shores of Florida and taking land from the indigenous people that were dwelling in the North Americas. Spain was fascist until 1978! South/Central America and Mexico has had a history of more corruption, violence and tyranny since! We (our heritage that is) have created some of the most violent cities in the world (look at the majority of
countries in the list):
From Mexico's Citizens' Council for Public Security annual ranking (note: 2015, for 2018 see below):
http://www.businessinsider.com/the-50-most-violent-cities-in-the-world-2015-1?op=1
My family is from the No. 1 most dangerous city in the world! But it wasn't like that when they grew-up
there. And my family aren't butchers beheading people with machetes!
I may be Spanish and Italian but I'm NOT a "Conquistador", I did not slay anyone of the 500 Nations or any
Mexican Rebels! Nor did anyone in my family for the last 75+ years! And my heritage intermingles with
various continents.
My faith as a Christian has never tried to convert indigenous people, nor have I shoved my beliefs down
anyone's throat (that includes my friends), or "un-liked" someone because they insult or made fun of my
faith or political ideology. Nor have I donned Templar armour emblazoned with a Red Cross and rode a
horse slaying Saracens and Infidels! With my olive skin and dark brown curly hair, I probably have
"Moorish" blood coursing through my veins. I'm just some guy trying to make ends meet just like anyone
else, I have no privilege or expect any appropriations or have a sense of entitlement, except that I have
talents and skills in my profession. Yet no one is obligated to give me the career I want unless I fit in with
what they need, and its up to me to sell myself as the person that can do the job the best. THAT is the
pursuit of happiness as any individual who has goals and ambitions. But I was born HERE, I am part of the
American way of life, with a culture that I can share that makes me unique, and who I am as an individual
that carries his own traits and personality. I am not a cliche, stereotype or a preconception.
See 2018 listing: http://www.businessinsider.com/most-violent-cities-in-the-world-2018-3
Unfortunately, the legacy continues :(. But let's acknowledge it, face it, and be better human beings. In-turn, to each other and other cultures. Though we must protect ALL of us from those that would do us all
harm.
Silent and stern in the sweltering night, The mob moves like demons possessed
Quiet in conscience, calm in their right, Confident their ways are best . . ."
- Rush/"witch Hunt"
But look at us now in 2017 (and still! now in 2018). Take a real good look how everyone judges each other
on who we voted for (or not). How adversarial we are, how different we all treated each other 2 years ago.
On Facebook and YOUtube its a fist fight with words, once friends on Fb, have now put cold distances
between, certain people don't talk or respond to various posts, or your comments are ignored (any
comment or post that isn't even political), or if they are in your area - close to home, you don't hear from
them anymore, or "deleted" as a friend all together - all because of what we stand for, what we believe is
right.
Your ideology icon.
But now it's "Those people...", "Anyone that voted for _______ is a loser, a bigot, xenophobic, . . . A 'NAZI"! etc. etc.. I have (or had) "Friends" that say some of these statements on a regular basis. Well are you simply a
presumptuous schmuck? But "I" didn't look at YOU that way (especially people I don't know), I believed
YOU have every right to believe in what you believe, as long as it doesn't hinder another to believe in what
THEY believe in, or that you intimidate, threaten or have a need to shove your "opinions" down other
people's throats - but you don't like that being done to you, don't you do it to others. Or those that claim outright slanderous statements of who you are or what you believe.
I'm a tolerant man, but don't go pointing fingers and perceiving what another is when you ought to look at who's pointing at who. This air of superiority makes me choke. What has happened to all of us!? WE are losing ourselves, our humanity, is this what's in store for America? Am I or anyone else with an opinion really the enemy? What happened to the bridges we had, what happened to the times where we helped each other, worked together and shared music, art, worked alongside each other, had discussions without
debates and crude assumptions? Were we not friends? Or do you now look at me by a flag I carry? Opinions that were misunderstood, or how you perceive the world, what I believe in, though YOU are allowed to
believe what you want to believe . . . or is the "individual" a thing of the past, back to 1984?
But I have to admit, when I look at certain people, or the "young", I wonder how easy could someone
misinterpret what I may say without any malice or insinuation, but it gets twisted out of control. I do
worry about that walking in various cities - but I am VERY willing to discuss anything, I'm a very outgoing
person and easy to talk to. I would hope other people are willing to give me the same respect I will
definitely give them, without barking and taking over the conversation and it turns into a debate that falls into an endless circle. And I HOPE I too will be civil, and not driven to defending myself from being
attacked physically. I hope I never have to drop someone because they couldn't control themselves.
"We see each other through different eyes. Segregating ourselves by class and size
It's me against you in everything that they do. This planet's become one big spinning disaster
If you don't like where we're going, then you won't like what's coming next . . ."
- Megadeth/"Post American World"
Here's a real sore spot with me . . .
So now we have these groups instigating our children to think we are
privileged, oppressing and dwelling on THEIR lands. Groups of the
"Reconquista" (where Reconquista actually comes from) feel as if us so-
called "Europeans", took over the land we call the United States yesterday.
Aztlan, LaRaza, MECha and other organizations are looking at anyone
with a European background, as enemies of the state(s) and should "go
back where you came from!", "EUROPEANS GO HOME!" (look where they
are protesting, at an Angel's baseball game where 70 to 80% of the fans
are Mexican Americans/Latino. Maybe both sides need to re-evaluate
their strategies) - Go home? where is that? . . .
- South Central/East LA? Pacoima? Pomona? Whittier? LaPuente? El
Paso? San Antonio? Phoenix? The Bronx? Spanish Harlem? New Orleans?
Miami? Spain, Italy, Portugal?
- I wasn't born in Germany, Sweden or Spain, Italy or Honduras.
- Where do (these radicals) think their last names come from (or, is it indigenous)?
- Are they speaking Spanish and/or English yet don't speak the languages of the indigenous Americas?
- Are they (you) descendants of "Dons"? Or their slaves? Those that attended them and their rancheros?
Or even descendants of those that were vaqueros, that tended the cattle?
- Are they descendants of "Californios"? So does that mean they are Spanish AND Native Americans?
- What about the people that were here before the Spanish Territories (or the "Louisiana Purchase",
The Mexican/American War)?
- Who fought along with the rest of the Militia's at the "Alamo"?
. . . See the "Tejanos": https://tshaonline.org/handbook/online/articles/pft07
- And, an Alamo survivor, liberator and Tejano: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Juan_Segu%C3%ADn
- Juan Nepomuceno Seguín: https://youtu.be/I-P_Cjgo9jc
- José Gregorio Esparza: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jos%C3%A9_Gregorio_Esparza
- Esparza's Son: https://youtu.be/b_CokHkMik0
"¡El pueblo unido, jamás será vencido!" ("The people united will never be defeated") or the current on campus; "A people united, will never be divided" is a hypocrisy when what they want is separatism and speak of division. So WHO is to be united? ALL of us or just certain groups? This goes for ANY ethnicity,
nationality, religious, ideology, belief or other "supremacist" organizations that does NOT want us to intermingle and integrate as "Americans" who make up our nation as a whole. OUR nation. Rednecks come in all colors my friend. I've been witnessed to it in my face and across my computer screen.
So what are we?
- I, along with many other latinos/hispanics have been marginalized as "traitors" and other epithets; "Tio Tomas", "White washed Latino", "Wanna' be Gringo" and more because we don't agree with the rhetoric that we are owed reparations, or that our "European" blood makes us tainted and its they who end up sounding racist and bigoted that they propose WE are - sounds like Eugenics to me.
- Do you oppose those, who we choose to vote for in any election (be sure to see the diversity on BOTH sides) with humility and tolerance, or with intimidation and violence? Or do you become part of the mob?
- So I have to ask what makes us Latino? . . .
- Isn't it blood? My blood? Your blood? OUR "Heritage"?
- The way I talk or where I was born, even if I don't speak spanish (or portuguese, or italian)?
- Do I need to speak like Cheech & Chong, drive a lowered Impala, blast rap music or wear khaki pants, or
show my underwear to everyone?
- Do I have to hold onto my balls and swagger and walk with a limp?
- Do I have to wear a sombrero and a serape?
- How is it that I'm not latino enough? (am I hispanic, latino, Spanish, Italian, indigenous, white, black,
brown, mixed?).
- And by the way, stop calling me "Brown" - don't freakin' "colorize" me. WE come in different shades, by
appearance, ideologies, beliefs and less important, skin tones.
- If "I'm" not one of YOU, please tell me; "Where is your LAST name from?" You can easily do a google
search to findout who YOUR ancestors are from.
- Stop the "entitlement" way of thinking! Know your history with America - but also what it is "today", in
this nation, why your parents came here. To be safe, to be prosperous, for their children to live in freedom.
But you MUST learn what this nation's laws are, its history, and WHY it is for "ALL" of us. Every race,
creed, belief. And that OUR Constitutional Rights are looking out for YOU.
You can clearly see that many latinos have stirred themselves up aggressively attacking anyone (ANYONE) for Trump (plenty of videos of mobs confronting or attacking "individuals"). I didn't vote for him, but is
that cause for violence, intimidation and chasing individuals in mass? WE can vote for who WE want. The last time I looked, this isn't Venezuela or fascist Spain in 1939. What does that kind of behaviour make YOU look like?
Again the latino (and other races) celebs; movie stars and musicians get involved as well, many of whom we may admire their talents, but want to sound like "the people" but are far too wealthy to understand our differences from down here where we don't live lavishly or they don't have to live here 24/7 with homes abroad (who also don't pay taxes because everything is a "tax write-off"). And some sympathise with
dictators like Hugo Chavez and Nicolas Maduro in Venezuela. . . . Hows that working out?
Not all Latinos/Hispanics are for their ideas of what the U.S. is or who we are. Not all of us just vote
Republican or Democrat, and many of us want to see us adhere to what this country was founded on and supposed to represent - The Constitution and "We the People".
. . . But apparently I am the WRONG kind of Latino.
Note: Some of the videos I present about the protests, the building behind the protesters is the San Diego
Convention Center, its where the San Diego Comic Con is held every July where ALL types of people (ALL
races, creeds etc.) come to enjoy the world of Comics, Gaming, Anime/Manga, Film, Sci-Fi/Fantasy and
EVERYONE gets along. So all this want of separation is complete utter bullshit and these gangsters and
radicals DO NOT represent "all" of the latino community in San Diego county and its cities. Nor are they all
"illegals" as the bigmouths and bigots claim they are.
But it seems like the stupidity, ignorance and pendejos are cancelling each other out! This is America, and I
HATE seeing it regress into chaos and separatism.
You can yell and sing "America was never great" and "Go back to Europe", but why then did your parents
come to America? If South, Central America and Mexico (or other parts of the world) is so wonderful, why
leave? Here, don't forget to bring LOTS of dressing for a healthy helping of "word salad" you are all about to get on your plate . . .
1. https://youtu.be/PjnfyzcQNjI
I don't believe in putting up a "Wall" per-say, but "Reinforce" the wall/fence that is in place with more
security and enforce the laws already up to date. But get ready for a 2nd helping of tossed salad . . .
2. https://youtu.be/UHDIm73FZN0
I feel for the 1st woman, though she is completely mixed up about the "wall", she fears for her life and
others, from those that are ruining their neighborhood, with crime and violence. I have lived in many
cities that have gotten worse over time. Especially the city I grew up in the 1960's, watch and hear one
member of the City Council (who is Latino) bash the others as he is ignored, and the current Mayor
apparently is an illegal resident . . .
3. https://youtu.be/x-FouEBb2Ug
4. https://youtu.be/3872KU2L-EY
Why do we need borders . . .
5. https://youtu.be/_nLPsFeSw4Y
6. https://youtu.be/6_a2lCTq70A
7. https://youtu.be/KeIKCSkrwko
8. https://youtu.be/vn5vK_tUg3w
(remember film/scripts don't exist in a vacuum, or
will you support gangs like Nancy Pelosi and say
they're all God's creatures too? I wonder what the
people who have to live with them think about that,
that are destroying their communities?)
2018 - We are losing control of our sanity . . .
2 Sides of stupid. Feed the fire by being stupid enough to jump in and be a "useful idiot" to ruin it for
ALL of us . . .
1. https://youtu.be/eWKgsDr8-OM
It's like saying all Christians are xenophobes, Atheists are all communists. This woman is an asshole of
her own volition, or she's just completely nuts . . .
2. https://youtu.be/n3tLhfbkkBg
Don Lemon yet again, including other media outlets, and the dumbshits on EVERY side commenting under
every posting of this video has blurred the lines of what is happening IN the video. And again, blame
Trump for peoples racist stupidity, let's blame "someone else" for THAT person's ignorance and vile
comments. What about the people who voted for Trump who don't behave this way? What about Dems and
Liberals that HATE or voted for Hillary, yet condemn Antifa, violence, vandalism and biased news?
So I'm going to condemn ALL Dems and Liberals because Mad Maxine wants YOU to harass anyone who
voted for or works for Trump? If YOU "choose" to do that, you're a useful idiot and are weak minded. But give me a freakin' break that "Trump" is TELLING people to insult, intimidate or harass ANYONE.
Stop drinking the kool aid because it tastes good, stop guzzling it because its giving you a sugar buzz and you can't think rationally. Its like, if I blamed the WHOLE "South" for the way a "few" treated me and my
Father in the 70's. Stop stepping in the bullshit! Or YOU are also part of the problem.
. . . But to the man who was unjustly berated and insulted by that crazy old fart, if you don't want to be stereotyped by anyone, then don't stereotype ALL Trump supporters are racist/bigots. The generalizations need to stop. Or its more evidence to dowse the sparks with kerosine.
Let the madness begin, AGAIN:
https://youtu.be/UzsRfIWA2s0
Another to inflame the rage of idiots:
https://splinternews.com/this-is-just-the-beginning-1827099100
So yet again, the virtue signaling and the leftist view of US, the Latinos/Hispanics that WE "serve" people
and nothing else; Quote: "To imagine that Mexican immigrants should happily cook for and serve meals to people who enable a man who is determined to demonize and persecute them as subhuman criminals is far more outrageous than the idea that those enablers should not be served in restaurants." end-quote.
What if those Latino cooks are "Chefs"? What if they own the restaurant? What if they have ambitions to
own their own place? Or are working in such places until they find a better job?
Again folks, I work in homes of ALL heritages/races, creeds, ideologies and beliefs. The Latinos/Hispanics
of various heritage are usually working, lower and upper middle-class, including wealthy (this goes for
any other minority/people of color) that worked hard to be where they are, have different ideologies under the sun, but all do not make any excuses of living the dream. They take care of their children and family as best they can, and have different interests as you and me, trying to live life in the fullest. Sending their
kids, or themselves through college (I HOPE they are learning from unbiased teachers/professors, yet
another topic) with hopes they will have a better career and life than their parents.
They are not cliches or stereotypes, I certainly am not. So why do these Leftist/Liberals and many (not all)
Democrats have this perception that we are ALL poor, downtrodden, victims that need extra help because we can't fend for ourselves and are soo oppressed by invisible villains, that WE "blame" others for our
plight? Oh, please SAVE US!!! Give me an f'n break. Sell the bullshit to those that WANT violence, anarchy
and civil unrest. If YOU are that weak-minded and believe the rhetoric, you will not only destroy the rest of
us, but yourselves in the process, and your utopia burns to ashes.
"Play with fire, you burn your fingers and lose your hold of the flame" . . .
Stand in line.
My family that moved here from Honduras made sure they became citizens so they wouldn't have the
worry on their shoulders they would be deported, to make a better life for themselves and their children.
We are not "rapists, drug dealers and murders" and we were not worried what ANYONE says about us, but it
seems some are feeling guilty or can't distinguish themselves from criminals to ordinary citizens that
happen to be latino, yet live, work, integrate and share our cultures under the American Flag with everyone
and anyone, we don't treat people as "outsiders".
Or stand in line for those that will exploit your plight, as a show of being a victim, someone that needs
saving, having no will of your own to find your place, your own identity, not a stereotype. Or you'll find
that your a tool for propaganda, and deserve "sympathy", instead of a person of character and dignity.
Who can make it on their own with all they have with them and persevere. But do it right, apply for the
right to be an American, so that you don't have to worry about yourself, or your children, as my family did.
- Is THIS the way we are to behave? Then the TRUTH becomes loud and clear to the rest of OUR nation?
https://youtu.be/lJaAfBOya6Q: Yet again, WHO are the racists and bigots?
But as you see in the videos (in the active word links) - whatever they "thought" Trump meant, they are
proving him right. It almost makes me ashamed to be a fellow latino. Perpetuating the stereotypes of what ALL of us are, but we are not part of the mob. Each and everyone of us thinks differently but I hope that most of us are for the greater good and that we are to rise above blaming others than ourselves. I may not
have voted for Trump, it does NOT automatically mean I supported the other 2 options, or any bigoted
ideology or discrimination. Lowering ourselves to violence, hatred, confrontation and vandalism does NOT in any way make us look rational and civilized. If that is the way YOU believe you will get your point across, do NOT count me in - YOU do NOT speak for me.
And stay away from our homes, our businesses, schools and neighborhoods IF you want your own towns to
continue to collapse under old thinking, not taking self-responsibility/self-worth, looking after and
caring for your own community, as well as not "knowing" your own rights and the laws of the nation,
under the Declaration of Independence, and not exposing these rights to those coming here illegally, so
that they have an incentive to become legal citizens, for the betterment of their lives and children. But
resorting to intimidation, violence and disregarding the rights of "others", you only hurt yourselves even
more, and set a terrible example for your community, and OUR culture becomes a negative stereotype. If
you promote this stereotype, you DO NOT speak for all of us . . . at all.
"Isms" under the guise of compassion . . .
If you believe in the high and mighty "Leftist"-Liberals/Socialists/Radicals and the billion dollar Celebs,
take notice how many of them stand on their sanctimonious golden pedestals, with such so-called
compassion for "us minorities", the immigrants and the refugees (and the homeless). How they talk
about US and what we "contribute", yet they think all we are good for is picking crops, washing dishes, manicuring their lawns and doing the dirty work, that THEY won't do either! Sorry, but doing a few hours of gardening or making your own coffee on-set because your PA didn't get the right decaf colombian blend with little sugar and organic non-lactose milk doesn't count. Many of us, of ALL colors, do the living,
working and dying everyday, trying to get ahead with our abilities and ambitions for a better life.
So check your own "privilege" and supremacism before using the "Alt-right" rhetoric to the rest of us.
And what makes you think any of these people want to live next to the "homeless"? How many times have
I've seen people (of ANY race and class) in their expensive cars, and walking on the street, not even look at
them when they ask for a handout. Many of us can't help everyone at every instance when we ourselves are going through hard times, but don't give me that b.s. of your "compassion" when the media's alerted to
your "altruism" and mindless/selfish protest participation. As if you're "one of us".
Here in California (maybe wherever you live), if you go to a home improvement store, look into the
outskirts of the parking lot, do you see those group of guys, possibly waiting in the hot sun for hope of a
contractor to hire them to work for a day or 2? Do you suppose that THIS is what they dreamed to do, to
live here in the U.S., instead of looking at others who get a steady paycheck and work 5 days a week?
The frustration they feel that they cannot provide enough for a family, or even themselves to get better?
But at the very least, they could get visas, or stand in line like thousands of others to become a citizen,
show their license to potentials, and work hard at attaining the job, or training to be what they want to be.
Like my family, like yours - where they don't have to worry that they may not have a job that day, or for
weeks, and feel so miserable and "cheated", and with hope, that they don't lash out at the country they
wanted to find opportunities and a better quality of life. I HOPE that many will be given the opportunity as
well as "encouraged" to learn what this nation is supposed to stand for, to learn about the basic laws and
their human rights, as well as the Constitution that would protect them in the here and now. So that they
know that this is the land of opportunity and freedom, and they CAN live the dream.
. . . but you are afforded those rights when you become a "citizen".
California's representatives are either blind or know exactly what they are doing and saying, to rile up
anyone who blindly "follow" without a modicum of ethics, morals, including common sense.
Mad Maxine (I ask simply, if the tables were turned, how would you folks as Left Liberals and/or
Democrats feel if Trump supporters or Classic Liberals/Centrists/Independants and Right leaning people did the same?), Nancy Pelosi and Dianne Feinstein are the "Horsewomen of the Apocalypse" as far as I'm
concerned. Their pontification and virtue signaling of how much they care for us little people is so thick
and saccharine, it'll make a pig sick. Its not about YOUR rights and compassion, its about the "Party", not
at all the Constitution and the Bill of Rights. It's not about a people or a race and their culture, its about
using their (OUR) "plight" and our "humanity" . . . our "emotions", instead of the law! What is written,
and the exact reasons why we need to enforce them so no one makes the mistakes and deals with the
consequences of what happens to individuals and families. WE didn't create the problem, the politicians
fight amongst themselves for power, and forget what and WHO they are fighting for - that is EVERY
American citizen that has acclimated to our culture and society, as ONE NATION, for the safety and benefit
of ALL. Not a few, a group, an idea, a philosophy, or 1 color . . . ALL.
But take a look here for more - but lets get some pious lessons from Saint Pelosi:
1. https://youtu.be/S_5Q0lNmtFE (almost, the whole damn thing): https://youtu.be/0kKQSDsXOg8
2. https://youtu.be/TxCqn4WmG1Y
3. Why does your grandson wish to be someone else? This is the innocence of a child, but what this may
make others feel (maybe, you decide); "Oh isn't that sweet, poor YOU. See, we superiors feel bad for you".
It shouldn't be the grandson in question, its Pelosi's sanctimonious piety and using these stories to show
her party as some sort of compassionate congregation of practicing what they preach. But I guarantee you,
not in their neighborhood: https://youtu.be/0kKQSDsXOg8?t=30m45s
"Not in My backyard"!: https://youtu.be/U8XJPwmX3jo
Look, I feel for these kids and families, we should help them, they made a life here because those before did NOT enforce the law, and they left US with these ethical, moral and economical problems. So lets put a stop
to it NOW, stand in line and learn the fundamentals of the Laws and Constitution that will protect you as an American Citizen. My family were all "Dreamers" too, but they stood in line, and acclimated to the way
of life for ALL of us. Sharing their cultures, but as Americans. Don't pay the "Coyotes", stand in line,
become an American Citizen and reap the benefits and opportunities to live your dream without worry of
deportation, or having you families taken apart.
5. And then this, now Dems are God Fearing people, flag wavers and have compassion for all? Even
criminals that have done savage crimes IN our nation??? . . .
https://youtu.be/4BTkMt_RL68
6. All God's children huh? (I know, "Sky Daddy" all the sudden comes out of your Liberal leaders. But hey,
only when it suits the narrative. Its what ALL politicians do, isn't that compassionate of them?). Please,
don't ignore this, face what is going on and those that hide behind their piety:
- a. http://www.nydailynews.com/news/crime/teen-ms-13-killer-told-victim-don-forget-article1.3751
555
- b. https://www.nbcwashington.com/news/local/Man-Sentenced-for-Brutal-Gang-Attack-on-15-Year-
Old-Girl-483704441.html
- c. https://www.nbcnews.com/feature/nbc-out/man-charged-killing-boy-10-who-reportedly-came-
out-gay-n887221
- d. https://www.chron.com/crime/article/The-most-violent-MS-13-crimes-of-2017-so-far-11168
242.php
- e. (You won't like this) https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/2018/05/17/ms-13-donald-trump-gang-violence-animals-immigrants-media-column/621537002/
- f. A reminder, why? Because latinos have to face the facts that our culture has a darkside and dangerous past, that is represented by those who warn about the dangers of these people, presenting the "facts" and are exposing them for what they are. But who is monitoring these criminals? Who are letting them in and why do they go on living the lives of criminality without prosecution to the full extent of the law?
These people are NOT "us", but the reality of the criminal element is dangerous for all of us, and our
borders need as much security and scrutiny as possible, to ensure these criminals do not get past the gates.
Again, by the "Mexico's Citizens' Council for Public Security's annual ranking of the world's most violent cities": http://www.businessinsider.com/most-violent-cities-in-the-world-2018-3
No matter what side of the political spectrum you are on, you have to WAKE UP and see who are defending criminals, or are just plain stupid (or evil). These politicians, celebs and news media outlets are selling a
narrative that THEY are the arbiters of higher morals, ethics and values, yet won't solve the issues because of bureaucracy, political gain/saving face of others, or underhanded dealing being hid under the narratives
and rhetoric we are hearing on a daily basis . . . as they divert us all by thinking we are looking at the
shiny objects they hide behind. What about our OWN "Homeless", what about the people that are here
LEGALLY from all over the world that are looking for jobs (along with those that are illegal here already), what about those people that are bringing their children who KNOW that it is ILLEGAL to come here
without documents, without being vetted?
"Pre-Nazi Germany"??? WTF? Are you people absolutely mental? These people NEVER speakout about
Antifa, Radical groups on their side. But please explain to me IF this is a nation that is heading to a Nazi or
a tyrannical nation . . . WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? Why are you still working under Movie & TV studios
that are complicit to the nation under such a "regime"? These celebs have homes in other countries, all they need to do is live there for more time than they do here in the States, yet pontificate how the rest of us
should live? Sorry Mira Sorvino, I respect your intelligence and have enjoyed your work, but YOU are part of an agenda, you cry tears as a Mother, but to gain support for something that is illegal, and has been the law of the land since 1882 (notice the changes of those who were excluded) and 1905. Most Americans do not want "Open Borders", we and other countries have LAWS to protect its citizens.
"We're not hostile":
https://youtu.be/5WiieKchMGk
. . . Again, anyone can point fingers but, "who" are the ones that are really angry and full of hate?
"Uh, I don't know...", "You know..." (Bernie Sanders supporters, get ready for this). Are you Left enough?
We are not a socialist nation, we have laws and the Constitution that is established for ALL that obey the
Amendments, and state, federal laws that WE the People are supposed to make sure that all
representatives enact and uphold for the entire nation, not special interests or the few, but for ALL. Also, a
majority may think it may be better for the greater good, but what does the Constitution and its
amendments represent that is for the best of the rest of the nation. To maintain the laws that govern
equally, to maintain structure and the rights of all. No one is goose stepping in my town, or ever has, no
matter where I have lived. Even in Louisiana, have I seen Ku Klux Klan members with torches come to the
neighborhoods I lived? Yet dealt with stupidity and ignorance, but it doesn't mean they were part of any
supremacist movement, they were just idiots. But I have seen radical organizations yelling insults and
rhetoric recited like robots, indoctrinated in thinking THEY know what's best for us as a "whole" nation.
They march thru towns and cities vandalizing and intimidating others like a mob with ideologies they
want all of us to adhere to, by force if necessary ("By Any Means Necessary", more of that in chapter 2).
These Immigration Detention Camps are NOT "Concentration Camps", they are waiting to be processed or
rejected, NOT "gassed", and they are free to leave, but they can not come into our nation without papers.
George Takei compared it to "Japanese Internment Camps", well George, your family and other families
were English speaking "Citizens" of the United States, it was awful that "Germans" in mass were not
interned as well (but if they were properly vetted, then the Japanese Americans should have been too).
But who do you have to blame for that, and the "Propaganda" against Japanese Americans? . . .
President Franklin Delano Roosevelt . . . a Democrat, his staff and advisors.
As have Mexican and other Latinos/Hispanics (that have come from their respective countries and joined the military after becoming citizens, many of the younger generation of the interned Japanese (Issei and Nisei) had joined the armed forces to serve in WWII and became one of the most decorated soldiers in the war:
http://encyclopedia.densho.org/Japanese_Americans_in_military_during_World_War_II/
My father tried to join the Marines in 1959 and again in 1961 to become a citizen, but had "flat feet".
So he had to stand in line like anyone else. Again, "logic" has been forgotten, if we ARE this "evil" and a
fascist/tyrannical regime, why are people of color, along with every other culture joining the military?
Why do many people of color and nationalities living, working and mingling with others everyday are not
fighting each other or "separated" and segregated? Where you shop, eat, play, etc.? Don't let YOUR logic deter you just because of your political beliefs. Or you are lying to yourself that these celebs, mainstream
media outlets are taking you for fools. They have an agenda, many of us know what it is, but YOU look into the why's, and why they look at YOU as a marketing tool to sell narratives that go against every
fundamental right of all of us afforded in the Constitution, and to our safety and "individual" freedoms.
But we have laws and rules that we must protect or our nation turns to chaos, so then . . . what will govern us, equally? What other ideology and document is proven better than our constitution?
https://youtu.be/nDsoyyJn1jU
-Thomas Jefferson
and believe you should light torches, raise your pitchforks, and billy clubs, and keep blaming or accepting without question those you follow, because you have no will of your own . . .
Play with fire, you burn your fingers and lose your hold of the flame, oh
It's over, it's done
The end is begun
If you listen to fools
The Mob Rules!"
- Black Sabbath/"The Mob Rules"
The Other Latino Voice . . .
to discover, and be an individual of your own making?
| https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2DU3TBNutEfoQRMEFlk37JQN7bfvk1Wd |
narratives, would have a brain aneurysm to see these 2, from the city of Whittier California, from the
Thrash Metal band "Exmortus" (Jadran "Conan" Gonzales:; guitar, vocals, and David Rivera; guitar,
vocals) paying homage to the place WE were born and proud of . . .
Chapter 3: Disturbers of our harmony
You tell me it's the institution, well, you know, you'd better free your mind instead
But if you go carrying pictures of Chairman Mao, You ain't going to make it with anyone anyhow"
- The Beatles/"Revolution"
"One likes to believe in the freedom of music".
Now you're attacking who can sing what? Nothing is sacred from ignorance . . .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jTOS_taCd5U
As Blues and Jazz (and Classical) are the foundation for ALL popular music (Afro/Latin and African/Arabic as well), why has its listenership been diminishing, and why has (most in) the Black community, which "invented" the 2 American musics, not embraced the music, other than sampling past music to modern music, and seeking out the history? Learning that we all have played our part in creating music, art for the sake of creativity and telling our stories. Just listening and creating music no matter who you are is important. The struggle was important, and expressing it in so many ways, for anyone to understand, something they could relate to, and with "soul".
Wynton Marsalis; Words to live by, and apparently it doesn't matter to him who and what your background is, only that it makes what you are and you apply it to your music, its everything about "you".
This here is the definition of wise words that also encompasses life, and from a "Positive frame of reference": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oUaLc1zabVo
Also, VERY strong words from Marsalis: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U4yb87vVaFU
The music's found on my Playlist are all derived from Blues, Jazz (and Classical), so why has it been embraced by so fewer in the mainstream world of Radio and popularity (now embracing Rhythm & Blues/R&B/Rap Hip-Hop derivatives)? Is all its good for is "sampling"?
If anything, it is a reflection of all you are and have lived with, all the pain and joy, and it puts back the
"instrument" in musicians hands:
https://bluesjazzlondon.wordpress.com/2015/04/20/the-demographics-of-blues-and-jazz-listeners-in-6-graphs/
Yes, musics turn into "hybrids" but videos/people like those who want to keep it in an inclusive box is the point. If we are to ignore the past, and not see that there are plenty of examples of various races of people Internationally performing music that were based or created by other cultures has been happening in "popular" music since the 1900's - WHY are certain people wanting to segregate more and more instead of being closer and closer, and progressing forward instead of backwards? Music is supposed to bring us ALL together . . .
Black Lives Matter and other organizations as well, are amazingly brainwashing more students and others of "guilt" and are proving that THEY are the race-mongers loud and clear. Blame others for YOUR mistakes, blame others for drugs, crime and homicide instead of being proud of who you are, and that YOU can change yourself, then the community by working hard at each individual to stand up for themselves and not wallow in self-pity or entitlement, but to stand on your own and rise ABOVE those who persecute you (be it the system, the "man", police? YOU can change injustice without fear or ignorance or violence will only come back to you and your community)! These organizations are to instill chaos and confusion among their own people so that they can't tell truth from instigation. The weak minded will follow to their graves. As any of us of colour/minorities, we have to take ourselves beyond blaming others for the way we are. WE need to make ourselves better and rise above.
Not all young adults are being fooled:
1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uFSfGHFH1J8
2. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BZxBOmYSa10&t=15s
3. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_0QTa2sbhV8
And here's a simple way to not get profiled, no matter your race, don't be an asshole . . .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uj0mtxXEGE8
So Uncle Bernie and his staff, can't even control or stand-up to 2, 5 foot tall young women (from a group
Bernie "supports"!) who take over a podium. So how would this man and his constituents stand-up to
powerful leaders and dictators from around the world? His audience/supporters don't know if they should
applaud, jeer, be disappointed or go blind - just nod, wave and applaud.
But hey, the BLM is "Respectful and reasonable" . . .
https://youtu.be/oV-ZSP0zAuI?t=1m20s
Keep being disrespectful, the speakers will have had enough . . .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ATOUHpKu_Dw
More: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MsTCsmqkezQ
"You owe YOU!":
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Oxz060iedY
Thomas Sowell interviewed on the Rubin Report (in 2017):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Ivf9jr
(2018) Knowledge vs "Everyday Racism" and moving forward . . .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JIdQMb8BUaU
And another important interview on the Rubin Report with Tommy Sotomayor:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KE-urLVdI-8
When do you get out of the "Plantation"? (When do we Latinos leave the fields?)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mCS2b87SbiM
If you worship the altar of Celebs, here's a voice that doesn't get as
much attention:
"It's in the 'News Cycle', and sometimes I get sick of talking about it"
- Don Lemon
Yet listen to every word he tries to sell, and then listen closely to
everything Morgan Freeman has to say:
1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wIKGbur0QLU
"...Black History is AMERICAN History"
2. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=10VPXk2ApWY
I would hope this makes a difference in the long run, that WE can accept OUR differences, but are allowed to have our say, yet to understand each other before we truly become adversaries . . .
1. https://youtu.be/3tWPMbQ_PCA
2. https://youtu.be/xoXwgfYAJFU
3. https://youtu.be/mp9nsc-vBTY
As what fellow friends (my beloved PrOguli of many opinions and points of view from around the world) have heard from friends that were born in Venezuela who lived, worked and seen what socialism has done to their motherland. The Chavistas ("Suckers" as a friend from Caracas called them) took to the streets to intimidate and indoctrinate those who only wanted to be closer to the world, and along with the police, to instigate violence, to isolate them so that they lived under THEIR idea of freedom. Because those who hold the power, hold onto life, they loved how it felt and were empowered by it, and they believed what Hugo Chavez promised, but it meant nothing and provided nothing but keeping them down. Chavez's successor, Nicolas Maduro tried to take it even further and now the country is in chaos and collapse. Even the chavistas are equal with the peasants or whom they perceived as the "elites" (normal working people) and privileged. As a former Soviet citizen has learned, every type of socialism is the wrong kind:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lEvWDwZYvk8
When does it become the right one? You can hear the hatred in their voices, how misinformed and how quickly they are inflamed and would snuff you out right where you stand if they put on the uniform and had authority over you. You see how aggressive they are and want you to be intimidated by them and they want to see you cower so that they can feel that surge of superiority.
In my job, I go into the homes of many races, beliefs, economic status, educated, hard working 9 to 5, professional, self-employed, students, musicians, various ages, veterans from WWII to Iraq, Gay, straight and everyone else (this includes Parents of Gay/Transgender people) - I get to converse with them, exchange ideas and opinions, and no one is threatened. You see their children playing with other children, they only see other kids, not color. Me and my boss go to lunch and see various people intermingling day to day. No one is feeling threatened by anyone.
I have most of my life taken Public Transportation, and not constantly hermetically sealed in a box driving to here and there. I have been in the hustle and bustle, seen the homeless and the crazies, the well to do and the poor, the people living day to day and coming and going to work. The hungry, tired, botched and helpless. Children wide eyed with teachers or parents going to a Museum, ready to learn and experience new things, new possibilities.
This is where I have lived. I can't speak for every neighborhood or community in America but it exists. A place where people coexist. Yes, there are those that would take issue, who will want to change its order, to disrupt its harmony, to disturb its potential, but people getting along with each other works. It is alive and thriving in big cities and small ones, in suburbia and quite communities, in the south, north, east and west. And all have its crime and criminal elements, but it does not make the whole, its dregs and devisiveness does not represent all who dwell in it.
I have met many wonderful, giving people in the south (many are great friends), or who have come from it. I can not judge it on a few idiots that made mine and my father's life a burden those many years ago.
You know I’m the same
We’re both too busy
To be taking the blame
I’d like some changes
But you don’t have the time
We can’t go on thinking
It’s a victimless crime
No one is blameless,
But we’re all without shame
We fight the fire
While we’re
Feeding the flames . . ."
- Rush/"Second Nature"
We are all immigrants in some way, from another country or descendants of immigrants - but look at the realities of the here and now. With all the homeless, unemployed, people who are using their benefits
for necessities to live along with Social Services (I have had to use them myself at one time, but it should be for a limited time, to help while you are trying to better yourself and move forward), smaller cities around the nation in economic collapse, how can we allow thousands of (not a few vetted immigrants trying to find a better life, but THOUSANDS at one time) refugees who will also need housing, jobs and resources to live here? And to be extremely vetted, to make absolutely sure that none of these people are here for nefarious purposes? Including learning about our cultures, our way of life in the U.S. (learning the
fundamentals of the Constitution for their rights) and acclimate to our society.
. . . WHILE we are processing people to become citizens already through the current system.
So you have to ask; Do those here illegally, do they have any knowledge of our Constitution and its
amendments? Have they read them on their own, or is it all hear-say? Or do these people live in ignorance, without anyone educating them that these are laws that would protect them if they became citizens, and that learning the language can bring their surrounding world closer and not be confined in box. But share all they are to others, as my entire family has done. As MANY families and cultures have no matter what country they come from.
Watch how it is done in Sweden, but even they need more help:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=82eGHYsP0FE
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2DU3TBNutEcb2PSJIqUwRM4xRXErbaWD
ago, a true "fascists" nation. Have they learned anything? (June-July 2018):
https://youtu.be/EZOmQLGUqcQ
(see other countries and various issues not covered by most mainstream media here and here).
We are living in a post 9/11 world, this is not a time of my Fathers and Mothers, but a time where if there is any opportunity to come into this country, infiltrate and blend-in to plan an attack with a group or
radicalized individuals.
Yes! We have our "own" that commit terrible acts of violence (pick an idea or reason), but it will escalate ten fold if people from North Africa/Middle East/South Asian countries can't find jobs in mass, or feel (or perceive) as if they are not wanted. That they feel that they can not have the same opportunities, yet do not understand that others have already stood in line to become citizens, also need work and better themselves who have come from all over the world (possibly from the same countries as well).
But how can we ignore the fiscal problems we have now? We were warned before, but we decided to keep
kicking the can and bury our heads in the sand, let the "saviours" save us! But all they ever do is talk.
Many (not all) millennials want "free stuff", but what/who pays for all those supposed freebies? And will these kids even stick around to listen, and when the truth hits them hard, will they even accept the truth? Will they see the wood for the trees?
This was predicted back in 2007 . . .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U19_OkPRggE
And a lesson for all of us to realize:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hsUdK70Jtmc
On my job, I met a well to do and very educated woman from Pakistan who is of the Muslim faith, her
gorgeous home was filled with beautiful tapestries of words and art from the Quran in its indigenous
calligraphy, who not only agreed with the dangers of taking so many people from Arab/Asian countries, she also worried about our natural resources - as she asked; "What about our water supply, crops, land?
Where will these people go, where will they work, how can we sustain ourselves when they live off the benefits
given to them until they find a job, and 'what kind' of job will they work, will it be enough? And will they
assimilate to the American way of life"? She also noted that they have a friend from Afghanistan who works for the U.S. government, he said about his own people in the various regions; "They will never change", she replied, "but it takes some time to change", but the friend insisted they are too tribal, too stubborn and set in their ways, no one agrees on anything - In the end he said "It's hopeless" :(.
I have also met other Muslims of different backgrounds on the job that wore an Abaya or Hijab, that were friendly and very hospitable, including Coptic Christians, and Assyrians (whom their artifacts and
antiquities of Mesopotamia have been destroyed by ISIS). Just people, living day to day in the typical
American way of life. Wealthy, middle-class or poor, they are, or trying to live the dream.
Here in California, we are seeing the worst drought of its modern history (2015-16). Many communities are allowed to water their lawns "once" a week (this has since been lifted in 2017). If its that detrimental to use water or not, its a crises. No matter how wide or more freeways are built, we still have mass congestion on them because people in smaller cities don't have fortune 500 companies to help its infrastructure, economic growth and keep its community within the city line, instead of going into the bigger cities for jobs. Straining its vehicles, fuel and tempers on the road. Homes are cheaper in the far away cities and
people drive at great distance to their jobs. Yet companies keep on building more homes, more shops, more
communities, encroaching on National parks and natural environments, with strip malls that hold smaller jobs with minimum wages, which are usually part-time, that more likely the young and students will take advantage of. Where the younger are preferred than older more experienced workers.
We have seen near by Cleveland National Park get eaten away by new communities that will saturate the edges of Orange County. When will it end? Will the wilds stay green or make room for more, and homes bunched together, smaller yards, less grass, more restrictions, higher costs and a home for half - to a
Million Dollars is the "norm", and food and utilities go up . . . Yeah, let's try to vett thousands of refugees and let's hope they don't want to blow us up here and there as well. Let's "hope" that they ALL find jobs and are happy citizens. How many people (including myself) are "happy" doing exactly what they want to do and are living comfortably?
But keep blaming those that had nothing to do with YOU and me, making a better life for ourselves. Find
the villain and run with it till you've forgotten what is truth from facts . . .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m3yesvvYEvs&t=32s
How about another reality check:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l2qKKLwn4xQ&t=18s
And from 2005:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yJ4iC8u94Ec
Children in cages . . .
Who in their right mind would be for that? And who in their right mind would ask people we have no clue
about their personality or lives lived? But the media THRIVES on these loaded questions, it makes people
angry, and when people get angry, they want more. Serve it on a dish daily when its hot, and people gobble
it up and want more of it - ask more questions of absurdities, and before you know it, some stranger far
away behind a computer will presume or try to make you jump out of your seat when they ask; "You would
probably be the 1st one to gas people wouldn't you!?". No, its not the kid that believes everything a
liberal/leftist teacher is pushing without question, instead of unbiased academics teaching facts without
political motivations, its not a REAL supremacist indoctrinating people to believe one race is inferior or a
threat to your race . . . no, its your grandmother, your friend, the person with a world of compassion that
you've known and know their personality. THEY are the villain now, anyone that disagrees, anyone with
their own thoughts, but without malicious causes. Everyone's the enemy, and facts and fiction become the
same. Paranoia has gotten the best of and changed your perceptions and common sense.
Set the narrative and watch the fire burn, and then the blaze is out of control, and the media laughs at us
all. It worked, WE fell for it. Now lets let that one simmer while we find another lie to pull over the
audience. We need the ratings and we need to find something else to make the suckers "triggered" (man I
hate that word, it diminishes its proper use) and keep the fire burning.
Tim Pool and the Media Lie:
https://youtu.be/aclwR-d4pT0
More blame, WRONG era . . .
2014 Photos:
https://youtu.be/-n_TUJRBf8E
Time Cover:
https://youtu.be/kPz4qqoL6k4
An indie journalist of Iranian/Persian parents, asks simple unbiased questions:
1. https://youtu.be/PjnfyzcQNjI
2. https://youtu.be/RZgt9uPMglY
Notice the 1st woman (who apparently didn't speak English) is holding a sign that she can not read. So
someone told her "Hold this mama'". She came to the U.S./California to live a better life (if legally or
illegally), yet how does she know what she is "selling" when she is told this benefits "her" people? I am also going to presume, if she came to this country illegally, and was invited to stay with others, she might not have been told about the Constitution and the Bill of Rights, or encouraged to look at it, or the rules and regulations of living within the laws of California. But hold up a poster that promotes; "Communism: One
Global Family, No Borders, No Money, All Share" utopia. Because Communism has brought communities,
cultures and people together (by FORCE) so well in the world? Oh, but this time they'll get it right?
Well, this is what its selling if you look at the website on the protest sign . . .
https://icwpredflag.org/wp/wordpress/
And they are indoctrinating kids, sell them the rhetoric, the guilt,, you get to wear a beret, learn and recite the narrative; YOU (all of you gringos, maybe the Spanish/Italians too) stole land and killed and enslaved
indigenous peoples. THEY don't belong on OUR land.
Its sadly been going on for quite awhile, and recently:
1. https://youtu.be/S6rL6PI1X-Q
2. https://youtu.be/GtLwjxS0xm4
3. https://youtu.be/BzLiFR3CFto
And some feel guilty for doing absolutely nothing - including their parents and grandparents, who came
to this nation to provide a better quality of life, and to pursue their dreams. Not ridicule others that want to
pursue them as well, equally. We are losing our way, no matter what side yells ignorant and ridiculous
accusations, we are destroying our humanity, and are trying their best to taint the way many of us live and
respect each other, in everyday life and coexistence.
June 2018: https://youtu.be/dDb6qxLVEhg
2019 in Texas: https://youtu.be/OMjiUCN071E
Again, most immigrants from war ravaged countries who want a safe place to live DO want to work and contribute, and will live a better life here in a America, but all at ONCE?
With many already standing in line legally, and all those that are here illegally (it could be ANY country;
Mexico, South/Central Americans are NOT the only ones trying to get in legally or illegally), how smart is it to bring more people when we have enough starving and not able to find decent jobs for them to get back on their feet?
. . . What happens to all the homeless we already have? And has anyone really considered how we treat the
homeless now? And those who use social services and benefits (I had to use them off and on throughout 5 years, couldn't stand doing it anymore)? With malcontent, sneers, judgement or how many completely ignore them, as if they are invisible? Be sure to check yourselves, yet all the sudden there is this pious
compassion for refugees? To me it seems this is used as ammunition to hurl at the opposing side which has much less to do with compassion, but just another tool to raise contempt and division to fit the narrative sold to what you want to believe - for your "side", not the truth. Not for the benefit of those in need.
But even then, how long can we go giving without destroying our economy and not having enough well
paying jobs to actually make a "living" to enjoy life? Not just working to pay bills and survive?
Think on this . . .
We can presume that "most" refugee's want a safer place to live and are escaping those that would oppress them for not giving in to their version of Radical Islam.
- What about those that may easily "give up" in enduring the struggles WE all have when looking for work and trying to take care of bills that sustain our lives? Do we presume "most" refugee's will understand the plight we all go through each day with all the freedoms we have, and will need to take responsibility to make a life while keeping our ambitions to find new skills and find a profession that will advance their lives and families?
Keep in mind many in our society have "given up" in their plight to find decent jobs with a livable wage, or trying to find a job with their special skills or profession, yet are still unemployed - and may have been living on Social Services for a longer period than what it was originally intended (I had done the same). . .
- Will these refugee's understand, and/or be taught the fundamentals of the U.S. Constitution? Will they learn to acclimate into our way of life, our culture (that includes the rights of each individual that is different than the society and environment they were raised in)? With the knowing that they can share their cultures, as long as it does not silence or discriminate against other cultures and beliefs?
- So if we believe that ALL refugees will give back to the community, will integrate and be part of the whole, not stay in a segregated community but be part of OUR society to share our cultures and intermingle with all
people who believe in different ways of life under the liberties we hold sacred . . .
- What about those whose goal is; to plot and plan within our communities to commit acts of terrorism? To infiltrate when America fights each other about this refugee crisis/issue, using this time of descension to come in when we are all at our weakest. As those call the rest of us "Xenophobic", "Racists/Bigots", "Paranoid" and
other epithets, the infiltrators use this time to integrate and sink into society. Possibly rally along and use anyone that are in other radical movements for their gain as "useful idiots", disposable/expendable assets.
To "lie" to gain sympathies and conceal true intentions for the "end goal", then it is good for the cause, it is a
sacrifice for the greater good (see "Taqiya" and its citations: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Taqiya ).
- If you believe that we here in the U.S. have "self-made radicals, racist groups and religious nuts already",
then why would you want to add to them even more? If we can not "vett" these groups efficiently and we debate their Constitutional Rights to exist here, how will we then vett the amount of refugee's that will be allowed into our nation and sort-out the "dangerous" element from those who are completely innocent?
Again - What about the safety of EVERY human being in the U.S., no matter their race, heritage/nationality, belief, status and where they have escaped, to find that our nation may just allow "anyone" to come in without proper identification, a record of endangerment to modern society, criminal activity, and trying to assimilate to another culture to seem as though they are latino or other culture to infiltrate our nation?
THEY are a danger to those refugees as well, who want to be here to make a new life and be safe from harm.
So don't we need to think clearly, slow down the flow, do the processing properly and efficiently, and keep all of us that live in the United States safe? No matter who is committing acts of violence, no matter what the cause, in our neighborhoods, cities, places we shop, work, travel, enjoy each other's company, places of recreation and entertainment, where children play and go to school?
For ALL, this is not a concern for 1 type of people, but ALL who make up the melting pot of OUR nation, it's about our safety - we do NOT want to be a nation where we are "getting used to terrorism", that is not the way any of us want to live.
. . . And those that come to this nation to be safe do not want that either.
And the devastating consequences for the near future.
Lord help us, we have another new term created; "Virtue Signalling".
The Celebs, yet again are preaching but not practicing. And unfortunately people that I admire like J.K. Rowling, who went from homelessness (I can relate) to super stardom (I can't relate, but cool, was very happy with her abilities to rise from the ashes) with her Harry Potter series of books and films. But she has been contradictory in her views of anyone who is in fear of the migrant/refugee crises - WE are all racists, bigots and xenophobes all over again.
But maybe J.K. should actually READ what her books entail; The dangers of "Muggles" and other evils that infiltrate and try to destroy Harry, his friends, his school, the mystical creatures and the world in which they all dwell. Page after page its about who to trust, who is being deceptive and how evil overruns
Hogwarts School and the realm they live in.
But please, even if you don't like the organizations these people are associated with, watch these videos and admit to what your eyes and ears see and hear. It is very important to listen to the points that are
brought up in these 3 videos:
"Dear Virtue Signalling Celebs"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jHnjlQC6Puw
"Welcome to the Real World"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YUSruA5mJa8
Note: I am not a fan of Piers Morgan, and he is not a big fan of Trump, but he makes some important
views on the overuse of one of the most evil people to ever walk the earth (also, Bill Maher has gone on for YEARS about the Muslim/Islamic religion and seems to have no distinction between moderate to radical believers, so what the hell is HE getting bent out of shape about with the rest of the panel?):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E1vfJo5Fs1Y
If you haven't read the Harry Potter books, or movies, or one and not the other, read or watch. They are excellent stories and can be seen as life-lessons and what we face in the world as many fantasy stories are; an "allegory", they don't exist in a vacuum, so . . .
J.K. and your readers, re-read your own books and apply it to the dangers in the real world, don't just get angry at all of us, but compare the plight of Harry and those around him and the dangers that fall in their mystical world and look at where we are NOW in this world, please. And how Harry and his friends actually triumph over evil.
- Havok/"Ingsoc"
This is happening in the U.K. right now. It brings tears to my eyes that the philosophy of Ingsoc is actually
happening in our lifetime. "1984" and George Orwell's nightmare is making Winston Churchill RAGE in
his grave. There will be those that think its just another day, while others are awake to see it all unfold, and
have warned what is happening, and as others go on their day to day, they will be indoctrinated before
knowing what hit them. When every right they thought was afforded them as citizens, as "human beings" turns to ash. The "Magna Carta" was just a history lesson that came and went. Sponge away the writing in
history books so that the next generation never knew it existed. It's not a left or right issue, it becomes
destroying the past for ALL to become ignorant . . .
"War is Peace, Freedom is Slavery, and Ignorance is Strength".
And every man and woman that made Britannia great in THIS day and age and accepted other cultures as
part of its society and humanity, all that made them "British", have watched their own government,
politicians and radicals push their agendas, instead of acclimating to English society, have taken over
critical thinking and objectivity for madness!
This is a "Fates Warning", this can happen to US, anywhere. This is no longer science fiction, conspiracy of "kooks" or paranoia. It's what everyday people are mocking, not seeing, not believing, and can not accept
that "2 + 2" does not = 5. WE are being witnessed to how easy a government and "rational" people can be
turned against each other, and your rights can be squashed beyond all recognition. You will be told WHO
you are, what "group" you are part of, and you will declare your innocence to deaf ears, and be maliciously
prosecuted by the mob, without due process, denied a solicitor, denied press to bring it to the eyes of your
fellow citizens. It's been buried with all you thought was just, and that liberty you believed, was afforded to everyone.
You learn the hard way, when it has diminished or ceased to be, you have become part of the hive. You will
follow all doctrine without reprisal, because YOU have no will or means to fight back. You've become a
slave and have gone back to being a serf in 12th Century England. Just accept and ASML8.
But also, lookout! WHO are "they" (media, the leftists, who stand on their soapbox pointing elsewhere and
possibly at YOU), look to whom is inserting their righteousness and making YOU believe is the enemy?
Read between the lies and how they insert the propaganda, and you may find yourself in league with the
very ones you are against (go ahead, argue if its; them, me, or you):
http://www.bbc.com/culture/story/20180507-why-orwells-1984-could-be-about-now
The BBC and the government are already complicit, but believe the narrative and fall in line. We're looking
at YOU England, and we here in the U.S. that lay blame "everything" on villains, not to the ones that are
avoiding looking into the mirror, who know what they are doing, but playing ignorant. Propping up their
piety, and selling the idea, selling the "book" that, its because of THEM you need to read Orwell's words,
that they are watching out for you with careful insinuations, when they only look at us as useful idiots with their projected warnings. It is they who are on the side of good because the news and editorials say so.
But the Eyes of the World are watching. Will Parliament, its Queen, and Princes protect its people? Or will its people hang their heads in shame, and give up and give in to apathy. And act as if nothing is happening?
And a once mighty and proud free nation, from a sovereign government, become a dystopian nightmare
and be destroyed from within. And without a shot or a word.
"As a European I don't think I will ever be able to understand the logic of Americans when it comes to guns. We are the living proof that you don't need guns to be safe. Imagining all my neighbours having guns in their homes makes me feel very scared. I understand the aspect of lgbtq+ people feeling the need to protect themselves but the solution can't be to further the violence but to try and change the system. I know it's far easier said than done but I just can't see using violence to fight violence as the right way to do it."
- 2017
- Winston Churchill
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2DU3TBNutEfXp7J-srgiLXeIjrDhR9hM
~ Censor This! ~
| https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2DU3TBNutEdOoO7aZT7VFRKRC7rXQcyk |
(notice how many videos will be deleted as well)
And also see, more and more people waking up to those that were selling the rhetoric, to whom they perceived are "useful idiots". Well, they too are disconnecting from the mainstream and facing the lies they were told, with cold hard facts and evidence before their very eyes.
https://youtu.be/tFlOzNfYzRY
Preserving the Right to Cognitive Liberty? . . .
https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/preserving-the-right-to-cognitive-liberty/
. . . Minority Report?
https://youtu.be/lG7DGMgfOb8
https://wikileaks.org/podesta-emails/emailid/3599
good... the new Ministry has no other aim than to unite the nation behind the ideal of the national revolution.”
- Joseph Goebbels
We seem to have been stamped with guilt, bigotry and xenophobia. But none of it is seen as campaign buzz words to point fingers and create dissension amongst ourselves? Spread the rhetoric and "Vote for ME"
because I'll bring harmony (...through dissention). We are becoming suckers and we are taking a big bite of the bullshit sandwich. The ratings go through the roof and you don't see yourself feeding into the big
machine, greasing the wheels to keep it going with your malice.
Buy and sell it all to the public, rile them up because its all good for the ratings, to keep them afloat, keep them in the public eye. Keep reminding them of their failures, the past, push the agenda, make them believe their neighbors don't get along, because they don't belong, yet second guess that you have always been kind to others (wait, didn't we just have a BBQ together over the weekend?) . . .
Of our shared humanity"
- Dream Theater/"Illumination Theory"
other with kindness and respect. We all eat at the same places, gather in National Parks, Amusement
Parks, Stadiums of various sports, attend various concerts, clubs, shopping malls, we attend weddings,
funerals, parties, baby showers, help each other at markets, shops, work together, and are friends. WHO
are these people that claim WE don't get along? People that do NOT want to get along with their neighbor?
Live in a place that doesn't know what is really going on outside their "box"? Have they been able to
venture out of it and see a better place? Or do they like the chaos, and want to maintain the hate and watch
the world burn? Or any stranger that is not the right color, political faction, male or female (or inbetween)? Can any of you reading this right now see clearly who has no intention of learning the differences in all of us, but keep segregating themselves because they feel superior than you and me?
I WANT to get along with everyone, even with the difference of opinion, because its always been that way in my lifetime. It wasn't me who didn't want that, but those that saw me and my family as inferior. But we did not let that deter us, or make us lash out at a whole race or creed. We know its a few that do NOT
represent the whole.
There are those that won't have it, and have a need for an agenda to split us apart, and ruin everything
we stand for, and what the core of everybodies argument, to be "equal". But it does NOT mean that any of
us have to think exactly like YOU. Accept our differences, its what makes us all unique, more interesting,
and why we gravitate to each other, to see things differently but with a common humanity.
But look at the media, look at the radical organizations that want to control the narrative, to sell the
aggravation to get higher ratings, to sell an ideology that only looks out for special interests, the elites,
the rejected that have a need for revenge on all of US that they think they have a right to take away all we
worked hard to attain by our hard work, our own hands. They say its selfish possessions, that no one
should own anything, and we have to share the wealth. When most people just get by with what they need,
or have just enough to survive. When is it ever enough for them, when will they be satisfied, before they
turn on each other?
- Joseph Goebbels
yourself from those who used to be friends, with things in common, the music we loved and shared, the
ideas and opinions that EACH individual has, where we could discuss calmly, instead of debates that go nowhere to convince no one, and yell at each other in text, never face to face, so tweet your crap, or let
THEM anger you and fall in line.
Now from great distances, pointing fingers with perceptions of things you never were. But you're the
enemy now, its easy to judge behind the anonymity of the screen, or in a mob - too scared to do it on our
own because there would be consequences, but find safety in numbers where you cower or lash out in violence, with such fear and hatred in your eyes, pour gasoline on the fire, and you've become everything you despise, while calling out the other person with vile and bigoted language. Neighbor, stranger, family
member, they are all the same . . . but look in the mirror of what you've become.
You've become a cog in the wheel, an asset to the executives, higher ratings means bigger revenues. You've become a graph, a marketing ploy, a scam, a business scheme, a "fax machine" . . .
Ignorance and prejudice, And fear walk hand in hand"
- Rush/"Witch Hunt"
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2DU3TBNutEfIZEuVsU8dyKx3tnUQ3d-c
Link for Part 2 in description
But, it's just business, as usual . . .
Look how sad and concerned they are for you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rmMe-2qaSss&t=1413s
But where is our Mr. Smith when we need him the most? . . .
keeping each side in check for their actual, real agendas, if its for ALL of us, or for themselves and their
supporters for hidden monetary gains. While others are still keeping the flames of separation stoked, to
remind us how "different" we all are instead of coming to an understanding to the "content of our
character".
What the hell is happening to us? Each side is playing games with all of us, we believe it all, we meet in the
middle and we want to silence each side and give into the chaos by fighting each other. "Americans
fighting Americans" - decisiveness and radical organizations behaviors used to make their politicians look
like saviours. When its THEY who work for US, when did we forget that? And then look at the choices WE
have? . . . who's fault is that? - look in the mirror. Maybe its the public, who is at fault for who we want to
represent us, including the way we judge each other, and how WE behave.
"But if you want money for people with minds that hate, all I can tell you is brother you have to wait"
- The Beatles/"Revolution"
Almost 2 months after I was born.
Chapter 4: Freedom to be ignorant
Freedom! - to terminate my fetus if it don't fit in
Freedom! - to kiss my brother right on the lips
Freedom! - to make my own concoction and take a sip
What a trip, blame it all on God . . . Freedom!"
- King's X/"Freedom"
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2DU3TBNutEdUUTMzPHG3UE_OPXpoECsd
- Wrathchild America/"Surrounded by Idiots"
"Bernie Sanders walks into a bar and says; "Free drinks for everyone!" Then says; 'who's buyin'!?"
So across America in universities and colleges is the new phenomena of the "Social Justice Warrior (SJW)" and words like "Trigger Warnings", "Micro-aggressions", "Safe Spaces" and "Pronouns" are becoming the norm and live in a land of rainbows and unicorns in a utopian world where everyone doesn't insult anyone and dwell in a cornucopia of a politically correct world . . . . weeEEEEEEEEEeeeeee (and here's their Poster Child!). Don't forget to use the new Pronouns! :D
Politically correctness has finally fallen off the cliff on fire with a nuclear crash! And many are giving in into FEAR. George Carlin's nightmare has come to fruition (you can agree or disagree with him, but listen to the underlying points).
George Carlin is RAGING in his grave, he offended EVERYONE, but this is a side that people have forgotten.
He judged every side, so when you are proud of your ideology and language, you may ignore to find you (and me) are part of the bigger joke . . .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RGrhE8givqc
Terry Gilliam and he made a joke, alert the media (or tweet it):
https://youtu.be/rrhmdS__axU
Blame blame blame.
It's a snake that eats itself - nothing will be right, everything will be wrong. The ultra sensitive have been given carte blanche to intimidate, berate and disrupt anything they find offensive. It is the equivalent of yelling fire in a crowded theatre with no consequences because WE invaded their space. Which is anywhere. Again, who gave them this power to grow . . . maybe their parents? What do their parents think seeing them on the news, YOUtube or made fun of on various shows? Are they doing anything about it? Are they afraid of their own children? Or the chestnut; "We want them to think for themselves" . . . but they're not. They don't know any better, they haven't lived long enough to experience the world. Where is their critical
thinking? They don't question their professors because they haven't learned anything from history. They believe that they are the oppressors and need to make amends to everyone. Made to feel guilty on everything THEY had NOTHING TO DO WITH or their parents. They eat up everything the teacher says and are encouraged to speak out against the oppressor no matter where, no matter if it disrupts, but don't even THINK about disrupting them. Don't ask them an intelligent question because you are in their space, get out of that space and they have nothing to say. Except yelling in your face, in some cases spitting in your face. It's amazing that they are not pummeled to the ground. Forget about respecting your elders, or politeness or having a civil discourse or a civil discussion. It's my way or shut the fuck up and we'll gang up on you (because there is strength in numbers - they can't say anything if they are alone because they have no courage to stand up for themselves).
What if YOU as a parent STOP paying for their tuition? How will they fend for themselves or actually take criticism from their future employers? How will these children survive in the real world where they think they are entitled to anything they ask for? What if they . . . failed? Oh no! You mean like the rest of us!?
Yup, they have the 1st amendment to be rude, crude and stupid. All these radical organizations have the right to be ignorant. But if you want discussion in a calm and intelligent manner, where each understand each other, though each may disagree . . . forget it. It doesn't fit into the plan. Objectivity is the thing of the past.
And how about those that woke up (warning - some vids have strong language)?
1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xzo12TIdGw&t=1s
2. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MS5IiYZ_lFk&t=26s
3. https://youtu.be/zkXNZ6YL-ug
4. https://youtu.be/9v_gBGvC6zo
5. https://youtu.be/XyJ7QYMfw8o
. . . And what happens when a Llama loses it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MHM1_gkHpuQ
Here's what happens when you assume waaaaay too much - you get educated:
https://youtu.be/Q3n640w_azk
Or simply ignore, give up, give in. Take without question, no common senses, lose all cognisance and
rational thinking. Believe everything you were told and . . .
https://mavearworx.weebly.com/blog/m-a-v-e-a-r-w-o-r-x-track-to-track-compilation-2-asml8
Organizations GLAAD and the (NEW!) Gay community has a new "Brand™" and now its "LGBT", now have gone after the TV and Film industry to suggest (they've created a “Studio Responsibility Index”) many to include Gay characters. And are trying (if not already succeeded) to induce the Star Wars franchise to include gay characters. I have no problem with gay characters if the writers found that it was part of the storyline, but to force ANYTHING (be it religion, personal agendas etc.) into a script to satisfy a group will look convoluted in the story, and is so hypocritical because come on folks, if a Christian organization did the same, everyone would be on FIRE yelling "There go those goddamned Christians imposing their Sky Daddy on us yet AGAIN!" (how about the belief in the "Force"?).
I get this feeling these new characters will be like a Saturday Night Live skit - the Trailer for Ep 8 will be ominous, with a voiceover from Rey, as we see various scenes interplay with elusive ideas of what is being shown - and all the sudden a character pops up and yells out:
"HI EVERYBODY! DOESN'T THIS UNIFORM LOOK FAAAAAAB-BUUU-LOUUUUSS!"
(your brain can finish the rest - or maybe you just got triggered :p Great, I'm using the word triggered -
note: I wrote that in 2014. In 2018 many are having issue in what is happening in the latest saga of Star
Wars, which I'm on the fence about).
In 2016, George Takei - very well spoken and popular among liberal circles for his opinions, he loses me
most of the time in his points of view, but look what happens when contemporary writers "change" the
character he played for 2 decades:
https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/george-takei-reacts-gay-sulu-909154
Instead of writing a story, that is completely in the mind of a screenplay writer who may be gay or straight, has the chance of ANY organization butting-in and like a Wedge to split a Log in two, may forcibly make their way into the creative mind to present something that was never intended. That the creative individual must give away their rights yet again to another factor to take their creativity away from them that was entirely from their imagination, their own brain. Everything will be GLAAD handled and subject to scrutiny as if the Stasi had to approve of anything that may be against their propaganda or the betterment of the cause. WHO put them into this kind of power? This is a Republic, not a Dictatorship - anyone under their scrutiny have the right to say they will make their own rules by the standards they themselves hold, without intimidation or going to the press in order to make them seem oppressive, out of date, bigoted or perpetuating a stereotype. Opposing their right to free thinking and creativity also undermines GLAAD by forcing others to think like them. You can't have one without the other.
Un-common sense.
It takes a gay metalhead from England (who now resides in the U.S. with dual citizenship, living in
Arizona), Rob Halford, vocalist of Judas Priest to remind us of our Constitutional rights, but that they
don't impede on others rights (read the quote below before saying "Thats right! The couple had every right to
SUE the bakers!"). He had said this about the "Chick-fil-A" CEO who made a controversial remark back in 2012 that may also be used as an example of the 2 (and more) instances of people who refused to make
"Gay Wedding Cakes":
“Everybody in this country has the right to say what they think and feel and what best represents them. The people at Chick-fil-A have the absolute right to say and do what they want. It doesn’t matter that all of these people disagree with their opinion. The question was how would the people that agree with what that man said do to support the company and how would the ones against his anti-gay remarks protest.”
Read More: Judas Priest’s Rob Halford Weighs in on Chick-fil-A Anti-Gay Scandal
Have your scandal and eat it too . . .
They could have bought the cake and the couple could put their own decorations and wording themselves (or someone they know) couldn't they? Though other cultures, in this case, a Muslim-based Bakery's
would not create such cakes either (would anyone not of the same faiths actually go into a bakery of these cultures? Maybe it depends where you live). The mainstream media for the most part purposely ignore this fact as if it is only a Christian act of bigotry. But it seemed like the man in the above links was not rude or offensive toward the potential buyer of the cake, all he did was say; Phillips told the couple that he would not make them a wedding cake because of his religious beliefs. In no other article have I read that he (or the other bakery) was yelling, being stern or angered when he told the customer this (apparently there were
"citizens" that were more offensive via-Email threats to the customers as well as the Bakery owners -
so who was more uncivil?).
If someone didn't want to bake your cake, would you insist that they did (BAKE MY CAKE NOW OR ELSE!), why would you give them your business? Go to another bakery, yes?
How many times have I not given business to someone giving me attitude across the counter, I leave and take my business elsewhere. Am I going to sue them because, possibly, maybe, they were racist and didn't like latinos/hispanics? Or should I sue them because they don't like long-hairs? It's freaking ridiculous!
Again, the media embraces "Celebs" who are on the left of opinion. But ignore a person who has been an advocate on equal and Gay rights - Patrick Stewart had said this about the Bakery controversy:
"It was not because it was a gay couple that they objected, it was not because they were celebrating some sort of marriage or an agreement between them," said Stewart. "It was the actual words on the cake they objected to. Because they found the words offensive."
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/people/patrick-stewart-backs-bakery-after-gay-cake-court-battle-10296738.html
More of his views and individual rights: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-54iiqwSYu8
And "Jean Luc Picard" on Civil Rights: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fjJN08uqt70
But as I said earlier, who and what Celebs say obviously, we condemn or condone depending how we as an individual observe life, what we believe in. Either way we will be scrutinized on what we hold sacred. But in the end it is OURS to maintain and uphold. If it is for malice and violence, we may pay the consequences. We can choose to disagree, but I'm not going to sue you for your beliefs. But I will defend my rights, and from physical intimidation.
https://youtu.be/QhQQtU8IvLk
There are 3 people that make total sense with common sense, hint, one of them is wearing a speedo
and is a (eh em, PC here) little person :P. And who are the hypocrites?
The BIG hypocrisy.
Where was the LGBT when Rob Halford and Patrick Stewart made their opinions, where were they when a Gay man has been blasted by students - campus after campus about his 1st amendment rights? SCREAMING at him and other guests with "HATE SPEECH!".
Students of various organizations and "SJW's" tried to prevent other students from attending a speech event by Milo Yiannopoulos, a Gay Conservative Christian, and chastised all those who wanted to see and hear him speak on the behalf of Homosexuality and the wave of SJW's (we can get into why he and many of his fans pick Trump etc. but that's a whole other issue). Warning, harsh language:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cK8SsvNKef0
On his tour, the BLM organization has also interupted his speeches:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NANZOkWk9d4
(whole incident: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pw-MnRyIoQY)
. . . is he not the right kind of Gay?
An important video to watch from an inside source:
https://youtu.be/Cee1P-SubcQ
The Disturbers: Part 2
The sparks of the tempest are burnin' you through
Spreading like wildfire, fallin' like rain
Though they may promise, they only bring pain"
- Kansas/"Sparks of the Tempest"
These children (are they really young adults? now with new "micro aggressions"!) who have no idea what the real world is like, have rallied against anything that offends them, which you wonder how will they
function in society, or even a supervisor at their jobs that may reprimand them. They are against being offended but are ready to flip the bird, spit, use harsh language, be the center of attention to annoy and antagonize, and yell random pc rhetoric, while claiming that others are entitled and are of . . .
"White Privilege" - you mean like the people (of ALL races) who have invested in your scholarships and endowments for your University? Your Parents who paid for your tuition, supplies, dorm or apartment and gave you a credit card? Or maybe you work part time and can't pay all the bills, who do you ask to help you?
On this particular campus (UCLA) that I used to pass by almost everyday to jobs, gigs and looking for work and going to interviews, Westwood is not in the middle of nowhere, its is a bustling city of just about anybody. Homeless, people going to work, tourists and students - the entire city is like one big shopping mall, you can find just about any type of food you'd want, book stores, clothing stores, shoe stores of all types, all types of Grocery Markets (literally ALL types from Organic to various cultural markets), 3
Cinemas (2 have had Gala Premieres) and are near the major cities of; West LA, Century City, Beverly Hills, Hollywood, Santa Monica and Venice. Museums are close by as well as a variety of Fortune 500 companies. If anyone is "privileged" . . . they may want "check it", look in the mirror. Again, what are their parents thinking when they see their sons and daughters behaving like this? (Btw - when I was able, I'd often give a few homeless people a buck or 2. But let me tell you, most students I'd see would completely ignore any panhandler and pass right on by. If anyone was to complain about the privileged, it would be the
homeless).
Who is entitled? What are these notions of who has it worse than the other? THIS is the real story across our nation: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L2hzRPLVSm4
How about this Iranian? Is HE the wrong kind of immigrant? The right kind? Or just a young man who
knows the value of freedom and an opinion?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5FGDFKeg9k
- Iran, learn what many who are ruled by the few, what they fight for and at great sacrifice:
https://youtu.be/F48SinuEHIk
- Iran Protest in Westwood, Los Angeles: https://youtu.be/8hxIwqq-7WY
More voices that are not heard:
1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Im6CD9yoF50
2. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JsangbIz_mQ
3. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aACpy7fLjFo
I can see George Carlin turning over in his grave (believe me, I have issue with some of the things he's said but this PC movement makes anything in the past seem tame). Even someone like Bill Maher (and Dennis Miller) in 2014 had to speakout about it, its become insanity! Listen to actor Stephen Fry speak about it. We ALL can agree or disagree what we think of a society under Kings & Queens or that a so-called Christian wants to instigate fellow Americans to BELIEVE OR ELSE - But Intolerance is the new virus spreading to the young that will inherit the future and mangle the Constitution, it is already happening - no one cares.
If a Christian like me (You, whatever you believe or don't believe in, you must have friends in your life that don't want to behead you because you don't believe - do they want to put you on a rack to confess your sins or believe you're an infidel, come on folks :p) or any religion is believed to be the cause of all the
world's problems, then we also have to ASSUME (an ass of U and ME) that Atheists are angry, rude and
offensive with no values or ethics of any kind and howl at the moon in animal skins and ride rainbow
unicorns! (no! they can't do that! They're ALL vegans too! How dare I imply such things!).
Again, I haven't blown up anyone, shot a mass amount of people with automatic weapons or was a Spanish Christian Templar back in 722 Asturias killing Moors and Saracens.
But where do we draw that line of free speech, indeed "where" and because of a few nut jobs, am I and others compared to idiots like these (< hand slaps head, but then someone woke up and see's the path we are ALL heading).
"I'll move myself and my family aside, If we happen to be left half alive, I'll get all my papers and smile at the sky, though I know that the hypnotized never lie"
- The Who/"Won't get fooled again"
You don't know the difference as you put on the yoke
The less that you know the more you fall into place
A cog in the wheel, there is no soul in your face!
Run for the cover! Millennium's here
Bearing the standard of confusion and fear
Spreading like wildfire, fallin' like rain
Though they may promise, they only bring pain!"
- Kansas
"Nazi's" - Nazi: Nazism is a form of fascism and showed that ideology's disdain for liberal democracy and
the parliamentary system, but also incorporated fervent antisemitism, scientific racism, and eugenics into its
creed. Do they actually know what a Nazi actually is?
The National Socialist German Workers' Party (National Socialist) timeline:
https://www.historyonthenet.com/nazi-germany-timeline
History:
https://www.facinghistory.org/resource-library/teaching-holocaust-and-human-behavior/rise-nazi-party
Sooner or later (and many of us see its happening already), they will eat themselves, and they will find
"flaws" under their own wings because of the want of perfection in their utopia. YOU will never fit in. And
if you think they won't judge YOU . . . you are only deluding yourself.
One Extreme to Another, 2 sides of the mirror.
Projecting what they are, a short history lesson: https://youtu.be/m6bSsaVL6gA
An enemy of the leftist, who happens to have more in common with them:
https://youtu.be/CNsdmvijLfs
The Milizia Volontaria per la Sicurezza Nazionale (MVSN, "Voluntary Militia for National Security"),
commonly called the Blackshirts (Italian: Camicie Nere, CCNN, singular: Camicia Nera) or squadristi
(singular: squadrista): https://comandosupremo.com/blackshirts/
As others argue; Are Bolsheviks . . .
1. https://www.britannica.com/topic/Bolshevik
2. https://youtu.be/cV9G1QUIm7w
Goose Stepping & Marching through a town near you!
I am finding that many people don't know the existence of these groups (hardly any mainstream media
coverage - What?! What a shock!), especially from people around my age or older, while I imagine many
only think of them as a "fringe", yet they are found in many major cities (and even smaller ones) across
the U.S. and Internationally.
The group (Cult) many Americans hardly know anything about, this includes those that believe they ARE
fighting "Fascism", just because they say so? Look closer, do YOU expect yourself to behave this way? Or do
you let others fight for yourself, yet not see the selfish cause, instead of the bigger picture? Or that history
indeed repeats itself . . .
maintained only for such time as the State can shield the people from the political, economic and/or military
consequences of the lie. It thus becomes vitally important for the State to use all of its powers to repress dissent,
for the truth is the mortal enemy of the lie, and thus by extension, the truth is the greatest enemy of the State.”
- Joseph Goebbels
The new "Weather Underground" to come?
ANTIFA (and BAMN) have come out of the cracks of the disenfranchised youth, and those that rebelled
against society and their perception of ill's from the 60's and 70's, who then became Professors in
Colleges, and now grade school/junior high and high schools, who were always a bit too hardcore, and had a ragtag few that thought like them, spread their virus and its become a plague. They have finally found their soldiers. Young, many being caucasians brainwashed to feel guilty of things they've never done to other "minorities", made up of; throwaways, bored suburban youth, runaways, anarchists, disillusioned, socialists/communists, anti-social, angry misanthropes, introverts and rejects RIPE for the picking, will resort to vandalism and violence for the cause. The older "minders" don't have to put on the baklava or do anything but but feed them their rhetoric, have them recite and memorize the party lines and chants,
scream it out in people's faces and keep the Saul Alinsky philosophy in play until they crack. But we see who's pulling the levers, we can see through the facade and the manipulation.
The young have found a way to intimidate, threaten and vandalize property with purpose now. No need for individuality, critical thinking or "questioning authority" unless it goes against the narrative. And that narrative is; You are FOR us - or you are AGAINST us, If you do not THINK like us - YOU are against us, If "Free Speech" and the 1st Amendment is against our principles - YOU are against us. If you side with those that speak positively about the Constitution, America, Free-Market Capitalism and the Proletariat - YOU are against us.
Get angry, wage war against the supposed "bourgeoisie" (anyone that has to WORK for a living and makes a better life for themselves and family?) whatever it takes, if it's violent, destroys property and anything the otherside holds as precious materialism (like, the clothes on their backs and cell phones they use?).
. . . because these people can't take responsibility of their own lives, work toward realistic goals to get
them out of their addictions, failures, self-respect, past sins, blame of "others" holding them down, and
the constant rhetoric fed to them by their older minders, that could not live in the utopia they wanted,
and have found those that were susceptible, naive and ignorant, but ready and willing to do THEIR
bidding. "Gather 'round the young ones, they will make us strong".
Know the enemy of the nation; BAMN (also see website):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQwfTPqn5kc&t=47s
Pol Pot seems the more likely influence for Yvette and her utopian ideals.
BAMN/Antifa/Mayor of Berkeley connections?
1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thBmfgOF_N8
2. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bv_Oiu1bDrI
. . . You decide.
Are they really the "John Brown Militia", Brown Shirts, or Antifa sympathisers?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CpSmW_wTaPM
(BTW - the reporter of the local newspaper is on record saying he is "Very Left".
Also many say that the weapons might be "Airsoft Weapons"):
http://www.phoenixnewtimes.com/news/lemons-gun-totin-left-wingers-demonstrate-trump-rally-bloodshed-on-the-horizon-9192965
The unedited footage:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QRQAQBJ944s&t=224s
"Close the city and tell the people that
Something's coming to call
Death and darkness are rushing forward to
Take a bite from the wall, oh
You've nothing to say
They're breaking away!
If you listen to fools
The mob rules!"
- Black Sabbath/"The Mob Rules"
The Protests have come to OUR streets, and WE are letting it happen. Yes, they have every right to Protest, but what happens when it leads to confrontation, intimidation and threats? And what led the young to rebel in such a way, instead of a constructive and learned discussion about the needs of the next
generation? When did common sense and ethics get thrown through the window?
. . . Look in the mirror. Did you enable your children to do as they please, did you praise them for anything and everything, instead of giving them goals to work on to improve themselves? There are times that we win or lose, but these moments give us character, the hard times show us what not to do the next time and we learn from our mistakes. We take these moments of hardship, look at them, figure out how to do it better, and apply it and see if it works for us. Its never ending and there is no quick fix.
WE "EARN" what we sow, and we treat others with respect on how others live and breathe, work toward
their own ambitions and goals that try to strive to be the best. But when you have authoritative adults
having them feed our young with "guilt" for who they are, what THEIR people have done to others (maybe not even in the lifetime of their parents or their parents), instead of feeding What they can do to make your life and other lives better with positive reinforcement, what can be done to make society better and look at the problems faced, to fix them and find solutions to better the Government, its Leaders, its social and civic duties. But in ways that don't hinder EACH individual's rights and beliefs, without selfishness,
violence and impeding on others civil-rights/human rights.
Look at your children, are they happy, content, living life and doing the best they can with all they deal
with? Or are they angry, bitter, lost, depressed, not engaging. Are they being picked on, yet do they know
the only person that should care what and who they are, is inside themselves? Have they been instilled
with pride, dignity and that no one can tear down what they are and what they can be in life, and write
their OWN story? To be strong enough to accept that they are different, that-THAT is what makes them
unique, that no one can insult them to the point of hurting themselves, giving up or lashing out at others, at
society? . . .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lU3R0ot18bg&t=23s
YOU are their parent, you have every right to be interested in their lives and help them and interact with
them till you are old and gray. And also to keep them from harm, but sooner or later they will need to
experience life, and take all that it is and make something of themselves. They have to work
on themselves before taking on the weight of the world. Who will lead them, who will teach them, and will they be strong enough to question, think critically and know their self worth, know who they are and have the receptive cognisance to know who is jerking them around and taking them for a fool? And still stand up strong and know who they are?
There's fire escalating higher! -
Endless wars, lost causes, Only letting up for brief pauses, Time repeats this circle of madness, Repetition of
constant sadness"
- Forbidden/"Infinite"
Look at the videos shown by various sources, is THIS Constitutional? Is this for the rights of ALL, or just
those that agree in a hive mentality? Or is this a (terrorist) CULT that is trying to sell themselves as a
revolution organized for the "people"? The more we raise our children believing everything comes easy, the more these radical organizations will rise, and the ones that have the most aggressive means will grow even stronger and more threatening to OUR way of life and our Constitution.
What will YOUR children be when they become adults? How will they conduct themselves when they need to fight for change and what is right for all, not just for a few, but for the rights of the individual mind, as
human rights, and for those that they disagree with, but are protected by our Constitution?
The mirror has many faces . . .
More can be found (including Internationally) on each YOUtube page link.
Strong Language - Viewer Discretion Advised...
Boston:
1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aqo576qqV9c&t=1s
2. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4yJTbBEozXo&t=9454s
3. (A break from the seriousness with some neck breaking Boston humor):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lplhIxgtVH0
Olympia Washington:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C0XumRYz6tM
Wisconsin:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IGAlWRIoQs4&t=54s
Berkeley:
(Note: I'm not condoning the violence, take it for what you will, but the supposed
"Alt-Right" are actually made up of various races and beliefs as shown):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4rQEJjp0crU&t=1s
The "U-Lock" incident:
1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9qKCl9NL1Cg&t=57s
2. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1tUnHFbmcU
A view of Berkeley from a long haired Latino:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ff6zsztNpq8
Anifa and the Black Block:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EPvN5o2aRNs
What is Antifa, a unique view; Who is the Left and Right:
https://youtu.be/xXfBZBfeceI
Who's the real Fascists?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ozamG2ntIgA
And choices got to have voices
Folks are basically decent
Conventional wisdom would say
Well, we read about
The exceptions
In the papers every day.
It ought to be second nature -
At least, that’s what I feel
“Now I lay me down in Dreamland” -
I know perfect’s not for real
I thought we might get closer -
But I’m ready to make a deal . . ."
- Rush/"Second Nature"
I thought Nazi's and White Supremacists were "proud" to be these ideologies, so why are regular people saying they are not part of those beliefs and just speaking out for free speech and our basic human rights? So WHO are the "Fashists" and "Natsies" they speak of? They are words that have lost their meaning, the
use of these words should be of a different spelling, they are used like condiments on anything that will
satisfy the appetite for more anger, more need of villains, and excuses to intimidate and commit violence.
They are words that cry wolf enough times where all who hear, will not take any of it seriously any longer.
So WHO are these so-called Fashists and Natsies? . . .
They seem to be wearing masks and dressed in Black and made-up of self-guilty pale skinned people who don't believe in OUR Constitution. They keep claiming the Right (Alt-Right/Right-wing, basically anyone that disagrees with the Radicals/Leftist. This includes Left/Centrists who even disagree with them) is
causing the violence and intimidation. But all I see is red flags, black, white & red flags and mostly young
people in black, covering their faces, and older people that must feel so oppressed all these years of living in
the United States (who are those "older people", their "minders", the ones that feed them their narrative
and lies, with the rhetoric to recite to memory?; "Gather 'round the young ones, they will make us strong") . . .
(more parts available in the playlist description)
"If you listen to fools
The MOB rules!"
If they turn on everyone that doesn't agree with them, and amongst themselves, who will be left?
Avoid collision.
Click on Sign (Part 2 Below and more are in the playlist description)
- Thomas Sowell
https://twitter.com/igd_news/status/871794622439313409
Got to smear the ones that want civility and conversation. It doesn't fit THEIR plan.
"Centuries of backward ways, have many left behind us
Who can count the good men gone away
The fruits of all our labors have left us as we started
We've come too far to end it in a day
It seems that everything we do is wrong
A one way trip to nowhere all along
Just look around and tell me what you see
Another stupid page of history
No one together, No one is touching ground
Look at each other, Chaos is all around
Same situation, Nothing is really new
No one together, No one is me and you"
- Kansas/"No one together"
~ Back to Basics ~
principles of how OUR nation looks out for ALL individuals, that was meant to keep us United . . .
"The Dreyfuss Civics Initiative". Please, if you are foriegn or domestic, learn what The United States is
founded on from 1776. The principles may have been skewed and twisted throughout its history, but the
fundamentals are the core of its declaration. It was not made for a certain class or people, but for ALL.
1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9GsUcDVXILY
2. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fzrmVVB5QBw
philosophies from indigenous North Americans, found in Chapter 5).
- BlazeTV
Chapter 5: Treading on you and me . . .
magnanimity and true courage. ... she never wounds 'till she has generously given notice, even to her enemy, and
cautioned him against the danger of treading on her."
- Anonymous
The flag has become a rallying for our freedoms that are being challenged. Remember, whatever your views may be, no matter how many agree with you, or even if few, do those people who don't agree have the same right to disagree as YOU do? Does it insight violence? But who's fault would it be if an individual decides to use violence to incur their point of view? Every person has the ability to stop themselves from doing anything that would physically hurt others, or to escalate tempers into a mob mentality. Many people are saying this about certain political leaders as if they are "mesmerized" by a charismatic leader and they have no will of their own. Stop and think on this for a few minutes . . .
If 2 sides divided by a barrier are yelling at each other, emotions are inflamed and tension ensues to the point of anger - if you put a gun on that barrier, would it be up to any individual to NOT pick up that gun because of the consequences? Or because its there, does it give anyone the "choice" to pick it up and pull the trigger? - then who is to blame?
Everyone is accountable for their actions, you can't blame society, your past, a charismatic leader or "the devil made me do it". If you pick up that weapon to kill someone YOU made the choice to do it knowing that other person would be seriously injured or killed.
Many organizations and people in our government are twisting dialogue and laws soo much that we can't tell if they have an agenda, believe what they are actually saying, or they know exactly what they are doing and throwing us under the bus because if they rile-up enough people, it will create chaos, and in that chaos they can move right in with their agenda, and we will think we/you went along "for the good of the people". Or was it just good for you?
Read its history here:
http://www.gadsden.info/history.html
And the history of the image "Join or Die" (the 1st political cartoon by Benjamin Franklin):
http://www.gadsden.info/snake.html
Culpeper Minutemen:
1. http://www.cmmsar.com/history.html
2. http://www.revolutionary-war-and-beyond.com/culpeper-flag.html
Culpeper Museum:
culpepermuseum.com
Never begins it, never, but once engaged, never surrenders, showing the fangs of rage"
- Metallica/"Don't Tread on Me"
When a young Patriot knows more about the flag and American History than Teachers and Faculty
- Benny Johnson
- The Quartering
The kids file through the metal machine
It finds what they may hide
No it just ain't right...
A sign of the times
Another church is burning to the ground...
Looking for the vandals and they're nowhere to be found
But the hate's alive
A sign of the times, Sign of the times...
A sign of the times, Sign of the times..."
- Queensrÿche/"Sign of the Times"
https://www.lexingtonminutemen.com/prince-estabrook.html
https://constitutioncenter.org/interactive-constitution/amendments/amendment-ii
Passed by Congress September 25, 1789. Ratified December 15, 1791. The first 10 amendments form the Bill of Rights.
Also see: 4th Amendment: https://constitutioncenter.org/interactive-constitution/amendments/amendment-iv
"I ask, who are the militia? They consist of now of the whole people, except a few public officers."
- George Mason, speech in the Virginia Ratifying Convention, 1788
“Who are the militia? Are they not ourselves? Is it feared, then, that we shall turn our arms each man against his own bosom. Congress have no power to disarm the militia. Their swords, and every other terrible implement of the soldier, are the birthright of an American… The unlimited power of the sword is not in the hands of either the federal or state governments, but, where I trust in God it will ever remain, in the hands of the people.”
- Rep. Tenche Coxe, The Pennsylvania Gazette, Feb. 20, 1788.
"A militia when properly formed are in fact the people themselves ... and include... all men capable of bearing arms. ... The mind that aims at a select militia, must be influenced by a truly anti-republican principle."
- Richard Henry Lee
More can be found here:
https://founderswisdom.wordpress.com/2009/08/15/right-to-keep-and-bear-arms/
At this time,
I do not own a gun of any kind. I have fired many years ago, in the Nevada desert; .45 1911, M1 Carbine, Lever action Winchester 30-30, .22 Bolt action Rifle. Including my late-Fathers .22 Cal. Pistol Revolver.
But I will probably purchase a pistol and rifle when I am able to do so.
I've known friends and family members who own weapons, and those that are collectors, hobbyists, hunters and gunsmiths. Including those in the Military and have served overseas. I have met Liberals, Democrats, Republicans, Centrists and people of various ideologies that own firearms in their homes on my job.
I "Design" weapons for Films and Video Games. So you would have to presume that anyone "protesting" for gun reform, and/or banning all guns together, many of these people, including their children and other family members, indulge in Video Games and Films (and in the arts/illustrations etc.) that glorify, or utilize weapons in their subject matter. Or . . . have family members, grandparents and who maybe are in Law Enforcement or Government who carry weapons daily, who in-turn have known other Government and Military personnel and seen up close, the dangers that are out there, and possibly know the value of self-protection and the right to bear firearms.
Weapons protect ALL politicians and Celebs at important events where security is needed. And some of these politicians also "carry and conceal", where for the rest of us, would be extremely difficult for us to get in certain States. THEY can, WE can't?
My beliefs on responsible people who own guns of ANY kind, and the "enforcing" of gun laws in each state should be obvious. And I do NOT believe we should impede/force any Teachers to "carry", but allow any teacher to carry, or any other device to protect themselves and their students (there are a lot of variables to this, this would involve lots of details to discuss of the pros and cons).
Please, whatever your opinions are on this, please watch the videos presented here, and listen, not what you "want to hear" but take in all that is said.
- Thank you.
“The wisest thing in the world is to cry out before you are hurt. It is no good to cry out after you are hurt; especially after you are mortally hurt. People talk about the impatience of the populace; but sound historians know that most tyrannies have been possible because men moved too late. it is often essential to resist a tyranny before it exists.”
― G.K. Chesterton, Eugenics and Other Evils: An Argument Against the Scientifically Organized State
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2DU3TBNutEfIC2HDmTsjd8pUoJIwx61E
https://www.gunstocarry.com/gun-laws-state/california-gun-laws/
- Wiki:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gun_laws_in_California
(See links to various citations)
Please, look to your States and find out your Gun Laws.
And checkout for yourself what it takes to purchase a firearm.
I WISH that we could imagine, just as John Lennon did, and come together united as human beings trying to live with each other across the world for a better life . . . and then someone killed him. Not because of his want for peace, but because a killer had "beliefs" that twisted his mind into believing it was "divine".
When one of the precepts of the divine is "Thou Shall not kill". Yet people with or without religious ideologies continue to kill each other, yet find blame for something else, instead of the one pulling the trigger, instead facing the killer in the mirror. WE are hopelessly human, and many of us at some point will need to protect ourselves. From individuals, or tyranny from outside, and/or within.
And sometimes I do not long for this world.
― Robert A. Heinlein
“If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude better than the animating contest of freedom, go home from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains set lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that ye were our countrymen.”
― Samuel Adams
“The means of defence agst. foreign danger, have been always the instruments of tyranny at home.”
― James Madison
“Enlighten the people generally, and tyranny and opressions of the body and mind will vanish like evil spirits at the dawn of day.”
― Thomas Jefferson
“Most gun control arguments miss the point. If all control boils fundamentally to force, how can one resist aggression without equal force? How can a truly “free” state exist if the individual citizen is enslaved to the forceful will of individual or organized aggressors? It cannot.”
― Tiffany Madison
“Freedom is sloppy. But since tyranny's the only guaranteed byproduct of those who insist on a perfect world, freedom will have to do.”
― Bill Willingham, Fables: Werewolves of the Heartland
“No one is an unjust villain in his own mind. Even - perhaps even especially - those who are the worst of us. Some of the cruelest tyrants in history were motivated by noble ideals, or made choices that they would call 'hard but necessary steps' for the good of their nation. We're all the hero of our own story.”
― Jim Butcher, Turn Coat
https://youtu.be/g7A-RLk-9Ag
liberty"
- John Basil Barnhill
An indivisible nation.
So who do we have to represent us in a way that unifies us ALL, but is also realistic about any dangers that we could face if we are not careful, who mean to do ALL of us harm ("all" of us)? I don't recall a time since being born in the 60's and living in the south in the 70's when I've seen soo much anger, racism and ignorance, but our so-called leaders don't speak against it enough or at all. Instead they all use political talk, they all skirt the issue, twist the words, or carefully construct answers that will leave it to interpretation. Or they ignore it all together, but it's "working" to their advantage. Was that the plan all along, to let the chaos grow?
WHO let this happen? We have been shoved into a corner and had 3 choices as if to say "VOTE FOR US OR DIE!". THIS is the best we can do? If these 3 (now 2) represent OUR morals, ethics and values, then we are screwed. And whomever wins, will those that voted them in, really keep them accountable? Will YOU hold them up to scrutiny? Will YOU question them when they are failing? Or will you become Idol Worshippers? Even if they are taking our nation in the wrong direction? Will you see it, and will the "otherside" see the truth if its exposed, even if its revealing corruption from their side?
We the people . . .
And maybe we deserve it because we've taken for granted the freedoms we have. Year after year taking without giving back, living life with blinders on because sometimes its too big for us. But as corporations take advantage of the way we get our news, change policies for our banks, internet, communication, FCC laws, radio homogenization and newspapers under a handful of companies to infiltrate their biases, or what they feel is best for you, or how to gouge more money out of you with fine print, loopholes and soo much to read its like having the U.S. senate writing a proposal on buying 1 bolt, and if you're not qualified to have it, the foundation collapses!
Food prices, Oil/Fuel, buying a home, Car Insurance and the taxes that go with it all are undermining us Californians that are trying to stay afloat in the middle class.
And as I pointed out earlier; homes are being marketed at Half a million to a million dollars as if this is the norm. And to get those homes, you need to drive far away from major cities because there is plenty of land to tear up (yet have tiny yards) and have your neighbors windows so close to yours you can see them showering! Because of the distance from work to home, freeway and road congestion is at an all time high. And we can't water our plants and yards anymore unless you own a golf course (though I am beginning to see many "brown and yellow" courses) or a large property with plenty of landscaping (I've seen plenty of lots with warehouses and sprinklers watering concrete as much as grass). Someone is profiting off of us, someone is manipulating the way we live for a reason, and we need to hold those accountable for taking advantage of us if its big or small. Especially if our communities are dieing a slow death, not flourishing or the infrastructure will defeat itself (how many buildings made for small businesses do you see empty, that were never occupied, or were occupied for a short time).
If fortune 500 companies are only staying in major cities, the more people will need to commute to them and clog up the roads and fill an environment with acres and acres of homes that people may not be able to afford as the cost of living and driving back and forth keeps them in debt.
Who will fix this? Who will be allowed to come up with a solution to lower prices and rid of excess taxes and establishments taking advantage of us with their manipulative policies and extra fee's?
It's been a sleeping giant and now its mutating. People want fair and equal wages but where will that money come from when people think that an entry-level job is a profession? Doesn't anyone have any ambitions anymore to leave that minimum wage type job and go to college (or while you're attending college and need part-time work - as it prepares you for the next job), or learning a skill, or taking a skill you worked on and finding or creating a job/business that enhances your life for you and a family?
I've had to work many part-time and minimum wage jobs while I worked on my portfolio, or worked small gigs. I never thought that these 9 to 5 entry-level jobs would take me anywhere but pay the bills. Just enough to squeak by.
They were not going to give me a better lifestyle and it had a pay rate ceiling. I had to work on my craft and go out and seek better jobs with better salaries. Even if I was in an art slump, I knew that to better myself, I had to keep searching and working on my art to get to that job that will satisfy my mind and relieve the stress in my life. I can't blame companies for keeping entry-level wages under $15.00.
How are those jobs going to afford a full staff? They are going to expect fewer employees to pick-up the slack, and if you can't handle it, they'll figure there is a line of people waiting and you'll be easy to replace. Or keep a tiny staff along with "Automation", because its cheaper and more efficient.
But again, some of our leaders and representatives have an agenda to make us believe everyone can be equal without hard work or ambition. That everyone should be equal when we live in a country founded by inalienable rights and to pursue happiness as an individual to strive for personal goals that will benefit our own integrity. Why can't we flourish as skilled professionals and raise our standards with innovative ideas, entrepreneurial opportunities and new ways of thinking about our communities and how we live within the natural environments that we are slowly eating away? Our natural resources are dieing, the wild animals will have nowhere to go and everyone seems to think we have no other choices but to keep tearing down and build for profit and gain. But who is profiting and gaining, someone is, not the people living in it. And how we are ignoring that we are symbiotic with nature? When will the captains of industry learn to live with it, make it part of where we live?
I don't see any of these questions being answered straight, I only hear bragging, mocking, toying with words, manipulation and utopian dreams that have no realistic economic foundations without taking advantage of the poor and dwindling middle class. If we want to tax the wealthy even more, they will just move to their 3rd home in another country and conduct business from there and have other countries do the work because we give them too many restrictions on how to conduct business and flourish (and don't forget those wealthy entertainers telling you what's best for our nation).
Just remember, there may be rich powerful people out there who hoard money (and hell, they have every right to be money grubbing bastards), but the wealthy are the ones that also donate to the arts and sciences. Set up scholarships for kids that can't afford the staggering tuitions, are part of endowments for furthering education that donate to universities that need new technologies and supplies, and other charities that empower people to better themselves and others (again - I'm not talking about the greedy or nefarious organizations, but people who want to help people advance themselves), to live life with the principles of the constitution, and our unalienable rights. Good people that want to pay it forward and give honest opportunities to make a better life, learn new skills or trades, who will take that education and make a new prosperous life.
If I had the means in my future, THAT is what I would want to do, pay forward the good fortunes I had, that provided a better life, and know exactly the burdens others are going through. I hope I can one day.
"It ought to be second nature, I mean, the places where we live, let's talk about this sensibly, we're not insensitive.
I know progress has no patience, but something's got to give"
- Rush/"Second Nature"
We don't see the ugly side of American Radical Movements on TV as much as reports on YOUtube, our
Children in College campuses protesting anything that offends them, the refugees from Syria and other
middle eastern countries (and neighboring regions) and how they behave, that VERY sadly make those
that are completely "innocent" and wanting a better life - lost in the mire of their brethren that are
taking advantage of resources, acts of dissension, crime, violence and attacks in Germany, Hungary,
Poland, Sweden, Greece, France and England. We don't hear or see any of it enough, we only hear that
anyone opposed to mass immigration to the United States are "Xenophobes" and that these people pose
no threat to us and that the process of vetting them are thorough and that it takes time to do so. Everyone
thinks with their emotions but not with their heads.
Have we not learned that the Enemies (ISIS, Taliban, al-Qaeda, Mujahideen, Hezbollah and more) of the
"world" would find ways to infiltrate in mass across borders that were vulnerable as a logical military
tactic? To blend-in and wait for the right time to strike, to take advantage of any kind opportunity to take
vengeance for their cause?
But the violence has not been "behind us" but has continued, but are we just going to get used to it? Are
we going to continue being afraid to speakout about it all in this PC climate we are still wallowing in?
YOU may not see it, or believe it exists, but there are people out there working diligently to keep our safety at high priority, while you (if that's you) are crying out some perceived "bigotry", when the safety includes those who come to this country for freedom, a new way of life and the dangers THEY escaped from to live a peaceful and prosperous life. WE need to come together to fight hatred and violence, not separate, or box ourselves in - teaching doctrines that do not assimilate to the rights and laws of our constitution. This Constitution is for EVERYONE; for Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. To live as you see fit, but with the freedom to be what you want to be, without holding back anyone who thinks differently, or would cause harm to anyone who chooses to live how they want. WE are not a hive, but made of individuals who think and live different than the next person, who chooses to live how they want to live, and so on and so on and so on.
"The Troubles".
But other sides put up memes and videos of leaders of other countries addressing US in America, that their culture were immigrants and refugees as well. Yet do these "leaders" live in the cities where radicals have made their home, and isolated their neighborhoods that want nothing to do with living with others in peace? Do they want to integrate, being part of the whole, to be one with their new nation that has welcomed them in?
And these leaders live with high security at home and wherever they go. How do THEY relate to their own countrymen, or even the average person going to work, living day to day, and who may live with the tragedy of violence who are out in the open? We have our problems, plenty, but does anyone remember the sadness of cities in Northern Ireland and Catholics vs Protestants ("The Northern Ireland Conflict") and the terrorism at the hands of their own people, which reached England as well? WE in America realize (and should know our history) that various cultures built, sweated, toiled and died to build this nation (The Irish "Gandy Dancers" and Chinese as well, building the railroads), and much of this history was built with great cost to others that lived in various parts of the country that were already living there. We also live in a time of "Troubles", but even the IRA (or Sinn Féin) were not blowing themselves to kingdom come in sacrifice to Catholicism toward all nations of the world. We don't need a history lesson, if they have forgotten or fail to include their own mistakes - WE are indeed allies, so let's think forward, predict what could happen and HELP each other with ALL we are, have been and learned from history and our mistakes, and be better humans together. Because no one's hands are clean, but we can improve.
We need to be unified in the safety of ALL who want freedom, no matter where you are from, but want
freedom of choice and peace among us all.
Note: I don't care what most armchair critics under the videos spout with their vulgar, bigoted angst - I am concerned with solidarity, the safety of ALL people and every nation. And this madness of people fighting amongst themselves, WE need to wake-up! And stop looking at each others as enemies, adversaries, "flag bearers" and what political affiliation you are, instead of just people who live in the U.S. (or wherever you live).
Sleepers.
In the early 90's, there were Russian spies known as "The Illegals" by the F.B.I. who were "Sleeper Agents" that lived and assimilated as Americans (which the series "The American's" is based off of). You can watch fictional shows such as "Homeland" to get a sense how it can happen in the here and now ("Zero Dark Thirty" about the killing Osama Bin Laden and, "A Most Wanted Man" about a counter-terrorist agency in Germany are also good resources). You may say its Propaganda, but actual agents of the field help these shows/films as consultants on how plots are feasible - They experienced the life and dangers, and there men and women who are out there doing it today trying to keep us all safe. Propaganda? Or dramatizations of how the mind of terrorists work ("Tradecraft") and those who try to prevent them from carrying out their sabotage or violence. These series and films don't just exist in a vacuum.
This is not to say that the U.S. has also created many scenarios that have backed-fired and have been detrimental to the safety of the world, no continent is perfect and other countries have taken advantage of it. We are not the only ones in the universe whose policies manipulate hands we can not see.
BBC reporter, a bit aggressively, questions "Hungry" about their current policies on refugees, but listen to
the "why" from the point of view of the Hungarian politician: https://youtu.be/zT-P1zQBiWk
(see more about mass immigration and refugees in the UK and Europe here).
But this is yet another reason we need better information through our news sources to see as much of the truth as possible (what is truth many will ask). TV programs such as 60 Minutes, Frontline (though I at times question some of their own bias, especially between 2014 and 2019) and many other expose'
programs on-line keep us in touch with important news that affect our lives and others plight. We need to keep our leaders in-check, the safety of our way of life from foreign or domestic organizations that threaten us, and to find out how we can mend, not separate and segregate ourselves.
But also scrutinize those that want to enter our nation, integrate into our society, yet share their cultures without imposing laws/beliefs that they were escaping in the first place. As my own family did in the 1960's, to live as Americans to provide a better life for their Sons and Daughters.
Again, remember all we are already dealing with in this nation, and how can we add more in this time
when we can't even get along with ourselves . . .
A perfect place and time to bring "Cells" into the chaos, to create havoc, feed the fires of hate and dissension and change and manipulate our freedoms.
Again . . .
I must stress that I am not an extremist/supremacist of any kind. But I am a "Nationalist" in the sense that I LOVE this Nation, that includes ALL heritage/races of people that make-up who are Americans and have acclimated to OUR way of life, with the laws and the Constitution that looks out for EVERY individual, that protects ALL of us that are "citizens", who want the rights and freedoms we are privileged to enjoy, and the dreams and ambitions to strive after. I understand that our country is not perfect, but I need to remind
anyone reading this, what country IS "perfect"? We would hope our nations are trying to be better than,
and learning from our pasts and not make those same mistakes yet again, destroying lives and denying
common sense/commen decency and freedom.
But ANY group of ideology, if its religious or political that embraces violence, intimidation and a want of
sole existence, to censor, to eradicate other ideas, religions and mere "discussions", and to do it by any means necessary is totally AGAINST what this nation is all about.
It was this comment, under this Tim Pool video that sadly seems true in the world we live in of extremists
in the Islamic faith (and in many countries, against their own people) who will have no qualms in
destroying any "moderates" who want to exist with its neighbors, "Us":
"They're not happy in Gaza ..
They're not happy in Egypt ..
They're not happy in Libya ..
They're not happy in Morocco ..
They're not happy in Iran ..
They're not happy in Iraq ..
They're not happy in Yemen ..
They're not happy in Afghanistan ..
They're not happy in Pakistan ..
They're not happy in Syria ..
They're not happy in Lebanon ..
They're not happy in Malaysia..
They're not happy in Indonesia..
SO, WHERE ARE THEY HAPPY?
They're happy in Australia ..
They're happy in Canada ..
They're happy in England ..
They're happy in Hungary ..
They're happy in France ..
They're happy in Italy ..
They're happy in Germany ..
They're happy in Sweden ..
They're happy in the USA ..
They're happy in Norway ..
They're happy in Holland ..
They're happy in Denmark ..
Basically, they're happy in every country that is not Muslim and unhappy in every country that is!
AND WHO DO THEY BLAME?
Not Islam..
Not their leadership..
Not themselves..
THEY BLAME THE COUNTRIES THEY ARE HAPPY IN! AND THEN;
They want to change those countries to be like;
THE COUNTRY THEY CAME FROM, WHERE THEY WERE UNHAPPY"
I emphasize again, extremists and those that choose death and violence come from ALL colors, all
ideologies, countries and races. Hang 'em all! THEY are accountable for their own actions and beliefs. They
should pay the price for their monstrous behavior towards ANYone. Take their religion/ideologies away from the equation; and all that is left are homicidal maniacs bent on revenge and suffering, they embrace death and violence for a means to an end.
And yet again, I am going to stress that I am NOT going to put ALL people of the Islamic/Muslim faith
into 1 one size fits all basket (just like; not ALL "Southerners" are KKK/Neo-Nazi members, or White/
Caucasians are supremacists and other stupid assumptions), but THIS is scary and dangerous 2 fold. The
mainstream media bury this story, and that IN OUR NATION this is being recited blindly, with no
apprehension and no thought of life and death. This should be a concern for EVERY man, woman, child no matter what Race/Colour, heritage, no matter where YOU are from, what your family background, and a simple human being that is cognizant and keeping dangerous people accountable. How do we let this go on unchecked??? Do NOT deny your own senses, yes its hard to hear, but do not deny all your faculties . . .
I know there are those that think EVERY Muslim is a threat and a danger, and I've seen and heard their VILE comments, but they also do not represent the rest of us, and that "us" includes, again, people who
actually come from (or escaped) the same countries that have trained, inspired and inflamed those who want to destroy their new freedoms, and the new home they have adapted to. They who feared for their lives from radicals, not only from their countries, but our own here in the United States.
But look where WE agree, amazing we called this years ago (now in 2022 - 2023) . . .
The Government think they know what is BEST for your children? When did that ever work?
We need higher standards in leaders, and they are just part of it, as their staff also need to be accountable because it is WE that put them there. THEY answer to US, the government works for us that we prosper and prepare to foresee what could happen (be it a financial crises or our safety and best interests, not the pockets of politicians), keep those who would manipulate the future to their own vision in-check that its OUR futures that are in view. It's not about a few but the whole, and preventing terrible things happening in the future.
But where are these leaders? Who represents the BEST in us to lead our country forward, not backward, but with new ideas that intermingle with our constitution, with our independence and freedoms we can't take for granted and build something from the ground up, that will stand the test of time and where we don't worry for the safety and benefits of our children, and their children. But that its what this nation was founded on, its core for all people - this Republic.
We can't accept our differences, but we can always disagree
Side by side
Divided they stand
Parallel lives running parallel with you, to the point where our horizons divide
My opinion is just a point of view, and your position is the other side"
- Fates Warning/"Point of View"
WE can't let those who would disturb OUR harmony dictate who we are and how we get along with each other. WE are Americans under one banner with many cultures to share and can be victorious if we open our hearts to our brethren, our brothers and sisters, to make this place free for all who would not impose violence and hatred, but open enough to hear other points of view, but live together in peace and prosperity. If a child can have that notion, if Martin Luther King jr. could have that dream (and the
musicians can write about the freedoms we desire and deserve), there is hope for us all.
. . . In order to form a more perfect union. We are not perfect but we must try more and more to have our say, though we have the freedoms to disagree, make sure that OUR rights and freedoms do not impose
on another's rights, beliefs and points of view. It goes both ways, so what is good for ALL of us?
. . . Liberty and whatever life we choose to live in it. As long as it does not hinder our individual rights.
ANY of us - think on that, "any" of us. YOUR views on how to live that life may differ.
Who are your leaders? And who are, Your heroes? In this America.
Stronger than ever we unite for the common cause of America.
Friends of America....."
- Magellan/"Friends of America"
Many pockets lined with green
From those behind the scenes, yeah they take the bribe ( it's on the side )
A sign of the times, Sign of the times...
A sign of the times, Sign of the times..."
- Queensrÿche
http://constitutionus.com/?t=Preample%20to%20the%20Constitution
Chapter 5: Part of the Great Spirit
We are children of the future, maybe we're just passing through here, all depends on what you do here
Under one big sky"
-Kansas/"One Big Sky"
- Crazy Horse/ Oglala Sioux Chief
peoples of the Americas. What could I say or do to bring great reparations for a people that have been lied to, cheated and killed in our American history. Not enough to bring honor to the 500 Nations (< please watch) that lived and died on their lands that today's American ancestors may have taken from them . . .
But I was not one of them, maybe my heritage but it was long ago and many branches intermingle with my blood and with other tribes of the Americas come my family. Generation upon generation losing its original tongue to adopt the language of Spain (by force, jesuits, landowners, who knows) and then the French, and then English of the American's who adopted from their former British King. WE have all come a long way to live together in these United States and its Constitution, together.
As many tribes now find its sustenance from Casino's and other ways of protecting and endowing their community, other reservations and tribes suffer through their plight alone. Through lack of resources and simple things like running water, markets to shop and supply, to gang activity, drug and alcohol abuse and violence. How could once proud people with a rich lineage of great warriors and chiefs whose wealth was the land before them, now give in to apathy?
There are those that are putting their culture 1st, and working on its potential to see a new generation tell the stories of the past to regenerate the souls of the Father, Mothers, Brothers and Daughters to lift themselves up and take courage back into their hearts to rebuild.
I was reminded of this on a special report on ABC a few years ago that showed the young would remind its elders of their pride and the ambitions of its new generation . . .
Children of the Plains: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GACcBe9Be58
. . . To the plight of addiction and gangs that adopt an urban language of ebonics, losing their culture and twisting what once was the way to walk the "Red Road". What has happened to the sons and daughters under the big sky, the Great Spirit? . . .
https://youtu.be/2I87pQGmrJg
Is there hope? . . .
Part I:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=70p5013vHV8
Part II:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z-8JqgS1HQ8
I was lucky enough to catch the one time broadcast of another ABC Special that told of stories of the past that were set in a contemporary setting of a young man on a reservation who was starting to lose his way on the "Red Road", but his Grandfather would relate the stories he has told from generation to generation, so that the new warriors would not forget, and that many ties bind for those who want to connect to their culture.
Please watch movie in full . . .
"The Dreamkeeper" 2003 (careful with pop-up adverts):
http://veehd.com/video/4937086_DREAMKEEPER-2003-American-Indian-Mythology--7P-for-the-Ultimate-Native-American-Collection
Or here . . .
Part I: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JVR3wqRWrGw
Part II: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VQVvyfXLrPI
The Dreamkeeper Trailer:
We wed this land and pledge our souls to meet its end,
Life has only just begun
Here my people roam the earth, in the kingdom of our birth,
Where the dust of all our horses hides the sun
We are mighty on the earth, on the earth"
- Kansas/"Cheyenne Anthem"
Words for the pilgrims
This Lakota takes a view that can be controversial and contentious after generations that have suffered, or intermingled with others to live the new American way of life with its neighbors, yet still keeping their culture.
This man has a warning for us all . . .
Can you feel our dreams, they are slipping away
I am, Cheyenne, I am the sky, the wind, the rain
In my dreams, my friend, I can see you again
My friend . . .
Cheyenne
This is the end."
- John Arch/"Cheyenne"
There are many stories I am finding about George Washington, with pro and cons about his later years and during his Presidency concerning the indigenous tribes within the growing colonists in the United States in his time. Many are contentious ("Redskins") and are not to be taken lightly, but diligence is needed in finding as much historical information before making any judgements on who did what, but it is
historically clear that all tribes of the Americas suffered atrocities throughout our history. But also
remember that the more aggressive tribes also took by force the more peaceful tribal lands. All over the world, the strong take the weak. Every continent was taken by somebody else and became part of its
bloodline, its heritage, its history.
There are interestings histories with his years of fighting alongside the (Iroquois Confederacy) Seneca and
Algonquian nations in the French Indian War. Many tribes today have othersides to the story, which may be political or stories handed down from their ancestors. But diary's, documents and letters from Washington - do coincide with what he tried to accomplish with many nations in the "Native American Policy".
January 2019; Trying to derail the Red Road . . .
tried to sell and the "Truth" that many saw before jumping to conclusions. If you want to avoid what you see
and hear to defend your ideology, then what kind of foundation does it stand on, and do you think its
strong enough to survive "facts"? Please, even if it goes against what you believe in, please see the TRUTH
from the LIES sold to those they thought they could make fools, because THEY "know their audience" - do
NOT let them take you for a ride. All they care about is ratings to keep them afloat, they FEED on the hate
and try to find that "moment" that will fit their narrative to sell you.
Instigators; turn the tables . . .
Here we have "Adult men" crudely insulting women, children (and towards "Black" people standing up to
THEM) after they had their time with the tribal natives and then turn them onto the students.
Those "kids" may have been ignorant and foolish, if they were making fun of ancient chants or they were
just singing along or chanting their "School Song", they did NOTHING to harm anyone, or verbally insult
anyone. Do they and their parents deserve "death threats"? - Look to the "Black Hebrew Israelites" for
the various insults and racial slurs to the "Native" tribe members, then at the kids. And the lies told by the
elder that says he was insulted, prevented from walking further, and may have lied he is a Vietnam
Veteran. This insults the men and women of different tribes that DID serve their country and nation's.
The Mob is not the kids, but the BHI, some of the tribal members, the news organizations and dear joe and
joy public that believed everything they were fed. This is NOT walking the Red Road, this is NOT what the
Great Spirit wants of ANY of us, yet we are blindly reaching in the dark . . . . .
https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=2739936
The Iroquois Confederacy:
https://www.warpaths2peacepipes.com/native-american-indians/iroquois-confederacy-constitution.htm
American Indian Constitutions:
https://blogs.loc.gov/law/2013/11/american-indian-constitutions/
Indian Reorganization Act Era Constitutions and Charters:
http://thorpe.ou.edu/IRA.html
But with any controversy of Washington during his Presidency, Andrew Jackson (Dem) would enact the "Indian Removal Act/1830" ~ "The Trail of Tears" which it would be known as throughout history as one of the most tragic stories in the plight of the native tribes.
Trail of Tears Documentary (also see above episode of "We shall remain"):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hd6866KRyjA
Trail of Tears Historic Trail/The Fathers of Democracy:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7LSkfmCj8Jg
Andrew Jackson:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EGfxyeuy8u8
Tribal Nations: The Story of the Federal Indian Law:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_fhRGnWISuo
Native tribes and the Quakers:
http://nativeamericannetroots.net/diary/870
News of 2016: What the hell is happening here!? How can we go backwards?
1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ycupu6z4gEE
2. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-BEqg5XdLxc
3. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OAaNdZkDLBc
More lies from the "Elites": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yw-GtoNMhPQ
Is this REALLY America again? :(. If this happened in a bigger city, there would be outrage!:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0LQ_hnHtMVI
People fighting for their freedom, clean water and rights to land:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HkoxJul1u_g
Not only native tribes, but "Farmers" are tied in this . . .
More: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2DU3TBNutEcIsu6Bw1DOEVyGYX6PARZW
Ride with the wind
So far away, the spirits will guide you
No more sorrow
Don't look back, your freedom will follow
Flying so free
Can't you see, on the trail of tears"
- Testament/"Trail of Tears"
We Shall Remain:
After the Mayflower - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DYAdf-oGc8c
Tecumseh's Vision - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9LPXEoQskYA
Trail of Tears - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VfNXu4oemSg
Geronimo - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q79NaHAscIA
Wounded Knee - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1DHFjB-A5Ho
War of the American Indians: History of the Iroquois:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qyVfr7sqGH4
History of the Indian Wars:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qO_IkNfT3Iw
The "Dark Times":
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fFvyEwzx_kg
The War that made America:
I. A Country Between
II. Unlikely Allies
III. Turning the tide
IV. Unintended Consequences
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLz58QJ68R9CS824vRBm5fiRvsTBCIBzPR
Discovery:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZOLT6ElK6AE
Pre-Colonist History:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7FItlStGMY4
The Ghost Dance:
https://www.legendsofamerica.com/na-ghostdance/
Many other Documentaries can be found from the above videos.
Americans, yet we can talk about the history of the European that was unclean, disease ridden, including
less resourceful compared to the Colonists and indigenous tribes (no doubt, please understand the
acknowledgement of invention, arts and science of the European). This is still the preconceptions to any of us and the American vs the European. Are WE "savages" or are they in need of us to be like them, without diversity and our own individuality and cultures?
Could it be simply, OUR cultures are different than yours? If only this could have been the logic to many of
the early Americans - and now after many years of mistakes, and human rights fought to become free, we still have to prove "each of us" to others, that presume, assume and accuse us, any of us, of things we
never were and have never done :(. While many want us to be of 1 mind, we still bicker for our freedom, our
individuality.
Remarks from Franklin, excerpts: https://youtu.be/IuuAKw1t1D4
Remarks concerning the Savages of North America, [before 7 January 1784]:
https://founders.archives.gov/documents/Franklin/01-41-02-0280
Benjamin Franklin, Native Americans, and the Commerce of Civility:
https://link.springer.com/chapter/10.1057/9780230597594_4
Forgotten words and logic :(
https://youtu.be/IZwUaXeg6Bw
More info: https://ratical.org/many_worlds/6Nations/FFchp5.html
Benjamin Franklin 1706 ~ 1776: https://youtu.be/R651WXMdWKw
1776 ~ 1790: https://youtu.be/Rhxh7GjZNuM
https://youtu.be/5it2G7gDtnc
~
http://www.nicoletung.com/native-american-veterans
1. https://youtu.be/YHm1-6THcn8
2. https://youtu.be/yv0_FZHkKBg
3. https://youtu.be/msDH2zgKmXo
4. https://youtu.be/yv0_FZHkKBg
5. https://youtu.be/xAlNguQju4Q
6. https://youtu.be/C5hMPF0qChY
7. https://youtu.be/5HNkxinjRD0
8. https://youtu.be/JQ8Kc0v_ACk
9. https://youtu.be/xDnX5TCWqus
10. https://youtu.be/5PKhbUl2mZI
11. https://youtu.be/GW26cXHfo-c
"We fought for you"
https://youtu.be/1WIaxCKQhuw
Code Talkers: https://youtu.be/Po9vUB0vV74
Brings tears to my eyes how we fight each other, but these brave men fought for a country that forgot
them, and now the young have forgotten what they contributed and why. This is why we must teach and
remind the next generation what many had sacrificed to keep this land free, and make-up for mistakes.
But for ALL of us who killed none of these tribes, who have lived with all peoples, that we honor and
respect those that sacrificed. Bless you, and may the Great Spirit take you home from your great journey :')
| http://www.wisconsinhistoricalmarkers.com/2015/05/national-native-american-vietnam.html |
Those that made OUR nation great . . .
https://youtu.be/-mhPO00bDm0
I give you this moment, I give you this prayer, I give you this honesty never given to me!
I sing a little louder, faster I ride, I will take you down for the use of my Father, my Brother, my pride!"
- Steve Walsh/"Glossolalia"
This is something disturbing that may make you disgusted and sad. WE need to bring this to attention.
This would make the founding fathers of this nation enraged and demand our government to take action against manipulating the words that were written for the people, NOT nefarious actions from outside
our nations sovereignty.
Chapter 6: The words of 1776
Smile and grin at the change all around, pick up my guitar and play
Just like yesterday, then I'll get on my knees and pray
We don't get fooled again, don't get fooled again
No, no!"
- The Who
April 19, 1775 -
"The Shot heard round the world": http://www.eyewitnesstohistory.com/lexington.htm
Lexington Green: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4zpXaxg3is
The American Revolutionary War:
Part 1 - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ISQhKxdBnpE
Part 2 - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F7Yajc0lBj8
George Washington: https://youtu.be/Vk4dWfg9jDg
Benjamin Franklin: https://youtu.be/T2br1fAKOGU
The Making of the Constitution: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ztsZk15Wn3Q
The 14th Amendment: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KWG8AcCty_I
― Booker T. Washington, Up from Slavery: an autobiography
https://www.bostonmagazine.com/news/2015/05/28/throwback-thursday-first-black-civil-war-regiment-boston/
https://www.history.com/topics/american-civil-war/american-civil-war-history
Civil War Trust Animated Map: Entire Civil War: https://youtu.be/ZmxfJqxwVIs
Sherman's March: https://youtu.be/U8kSUDp2BC0
The Civil War by Ken Burns (see parts - be careful of pop up adverts):
http://sockshare.video/watch/0v8O8Jdw-the-civil-war-season-1.html
Ken Burns Civil War in parts (Via-Youtube at the moment):
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLXKLYIH9Cw8viQePDMdNf8yn3l3pKJkEc
Lincoln:
1. https://youtu.be/dmurPGwvKik
2. https://youtu.be/sLT6CmVm6Ys
3. Various: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLutXO1Ng1YWmTEYCwIpgC15WS-sXJ0vkj
plowing up the ground".
- Frederick Douglass
| July 5, 1852 ~ 9 years before the American Civil War |
https://youtu.be/4NNBIMYGtLo
A More perfect Union - http://www.pbs.org/video/2365006249/
It's a Free Country - http://www.pbs.org/video/2365010643/
Created Equal - http://www.pbs.org/tpt/constitution-usa-peter-sagal/watch/created-equal/
Built to Last - http://www.pbs.org/tpt/constitution-usa-peter-sagal/watch/built-to-last/
A lot of interesting facts and points of view, a MUST watch.
See all episodes: http://www.pbs.org/tpt/constitution-usa-peter-sagal/home/
Excerpts: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLzkQfVIJun2Lofem_yV_glNfIbFMhL8Vq
Documents:
Our Republic - http://www.ourrepubliconline.com/
The Charters of Freedom - http://www.archives.gov/exhibits/charters/declaration_transcript.html
The actual Documents - http://constitutionus.com/images_intro.html
The Bill of Rights and all Amendments:
- http://constitutionus.com/t=Preample%20to%20the%20Constitution
Has the captain let go of the wheel?
Or could we please try to find a way to be a bit more kind?
I see the road to tomorrow in the haze!
. . . I see the road".
- Queensrÿche
~ Axiom! ~
- Thomas Jefferson
Excerpt from the Declaration of Independence
Epilogue: Where do we go from here . . .
- Kansas/"Back Door"
So with my own story, the plight in which we put ourselves in, our leaders and those who will represent us in today's world and where we are headed, there are many questions to be answered. But how will WE keep those in check within the words of our Constitution? Be fair, be critical of your party, look within to be honest, if your views can be in tolerant of others. We may disagree on many points, but that we realize we live under laws and common sense, a common purpose to be honest with ourselves and others that each person can live, work, pray and believe in their own way as long as it does not prevent others from living in their pursuit of happiness. Nothing should deter them from their goals and ambitions, or to live.
But there are many who are the disturbers of our harmony that are trying to manipulate and justify their views on others that do not fit within the context of free will and the constitution. Those who will usurp the will of the people for the will of a few. It has pained me to the point of sickness and despair of how my fellow Americans made up of all that the world is, are fighting each other and that ignorance can not see beyond (only) what is in front of them. We are becoming lost in the wilderness, filled with malice and we will lose our way.
And the corruption of those who manipulate the laws and people that are supposed to represent the best for all of us, they are treacherous and lack any honor or anything the Constitution stands for. They corrupt everything WE the People stand for to make way to be the "1st". No matter who they step on to get there - we in turn have lost OUR way when we support such people who make up their own rules within the government, no matter the party they belong to, they need to be accountable for their actions and stand before a fair, impartial and Constitutional Trial. But these career politicians seem to have too many friends in high and low places. But they are exposing the problems we need to fix and bring them to justice. They need to face the people's harder questions and answer to their crimes. This can't be let go, we can not "move on" if THEY are to be our Leaders. They need to represent OUR "Ethics, Values and Morals" or this Nation can not stand. But be careful and critical, "who" am I talking about, and don't point fingers at others when everyone needs to scrutinize who they believe in.
Maybe you have found I'm a hypocrite, well, guilty as charged I'm sure. I never claimed to have all the answers (if I did, its only from a "personal" point of view), maybe we all can cherry pick the good and bad in EACH and everyone of us, pick at it all we want like animals grooming each other. Or see that we are ALL
fallible creatures and can not possibly be "perfect and solve every problem overnight. We can only fix
things with great care, lessons learned, and apply them at the moment until other things crack, or break.
How long will people tell you how "bad or evil" you and I are, instead of coming from a "positive frame of reference"? When will we stop with the selfish precept of "Me and I, Us" instead of We? But we also need
to work on "Ourselves" before we start working on everyone else. But what do I know right? I'm sure you
will have plenty of points to roast me over an open fire :P. So be it, my hypocriticle oath and manifesto of
not being as perfect as YOU ;). But I wish you peace, success and prosperity anyway.
You either make it better or make it worse.
- I believe this. I believe it's true, I believe it
All the world is dangerous, Full of homicidals and terrorists, But underneath their blanket of hate
The only thing that will survive is our love and faith."
- Adrian Belew/"What I Believe"
I was reminded of honor remembering the "gi" I wore as a uniform in Karate, with it went an oath of conduct when wearing it, and living life: http://www.shotokankarate.ca/dojo%20kun.htm
It was also a film that reminded of this, where a man under great pressure and obstacles, still lived by a code of honor.
This can be for anyone, for the atheist, agnostic, those who put on a military uniform or a uniform for work, a student, a lawyer in a suit, a clergyman, a teacher, parks ranger, a police officer, the protestor and people of great responsibility, as well as a Mother and Father. Anyone who is trusted with others to do right and live right in accordance to ethical values that transcend religions, science or the void, but standards and ethics that are common to all.
This is the same for those of any faith, we put on the armour of righteousness to deflect those that would harm or shame, but also the responsibility of the words we must adhere to (In my personal case, the words of Christ), in-turn we do not force our views upon anyone, but to enlighten if we are allowed, and share what we feel in our hearts, not with anger but with hope. We have our faults and frailty like all others, so we should not be above others but humble. Much like the Karate code, it is up to YOU if its vise or versa.
Is there a chance WE can save ourselves from all the hatred? When can we look at each other as friends again? All who struggle, are blessed or have lost everything they had, including trust of others, and our fellow man, ourselves.
I hope WE can save our humanity, but we may have to start with the one person first . . . you.
- RUSH/"Freewill"
[Circular to the States, 8 June 1783 - Writings 26:484--89]
- George Washington, Writings
But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate -- we can not consecrate -- we can not hallow -- this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us -- that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion -- that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain -- that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom -- and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth."
- Abraham Lincoln
November 19, 1863
And tomorrow the same
It’s hard to take the world
The way that it came
Too many rapids
Keep us sweeping along
Too many captains
Keep on steering us wrong
It’s hard to take the heat --
It’s hard to lay blame
To fight the fire --
While we’re
Feeding the flames
. . . I thought we might get closer".
- Rush
and lets have some dinner . . .
Freedom to get elected and set my own salary
Freedom to go out and join the KKK
Freedom to get in trouble for everything that I say
What a day, blame it all on God!
Freedom..."
- Kings X/"Freedom"
Your freedom is a freedom of choice, a freedom of conscious, a freedom of existence.
But what you believe may not be good for the whole.
These are the prices of Freedom. Or the cost is OUR individuality.
On this declaration Day
~ Born on the 4th of July ~
Sunlit valley, mountain fields, unseen in the rain, here all life abounds
No man rules this land, no human hand has soiled this paradise
Waiting patiently, so much to see, so rich in Earth's delights"
- Kansas/"Song for America"
*please check back for added songs!
for their bravery to stand against oppression, the quest, the fight and protecting our way of life.
To all those that served to protect us from harm and tyranny, our thoughts, our prayers and our deepest thanks for your enduring spirit for the freedoms WE should never take for granted.
WE owe you our lives, respect and the best within all of us for all you have sacrificed.
Thank you :).
On this Declaration Day:
| https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2DU3TBNutEe0XqKmnrIJhLZSLiuG0tHL |
Remember to support the bands and musicians by purchasing their albums :)
Story of the "Star Spangled Banner":
http://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/the-story-behind-the-star-spangled-banner-149220970/?no-ist
~ Tracks ~
~ Declaration 1776
John Williams/Empire of the Sun OST - The British Grenadiers
The idea behind adding this track was the brave men of the British Army marching to reclaim the colonies in their 1st battle, but that it would not be as easy as they thought ~ so comes the ominous tone at the end (keep in mind that John Williams composed the piece for a totally different situation).
And now, Britain is going through their own time of Independence, we will see if the time is right for them . . .
Iced Earth - 1776
April Morning; Conflict on Lexington Green
American Revolution 1776
Iced Earth - Star Spangled Banner & Declaration Day
Riot - Blood of the English
Metallica - Don't Tread On Me
Havok - Give me liberty, or give me death
Iced Earth - The Reckoning (Don't Tread On Me)
Powermad - Absolute Power
Schoolhouse Rock! The Preamble
Adrenaline Mob - WE the People
Toxik - Stand Up
Suspyre - Let Freedom Ring (2008)
Queensrÿche - Guardian
Steve Vai - Liberty (Instrumental)
Styx - Prelude 12/Suite Madame Blue
Adrian Belew - This is what i believe
Kansas - Can I Tell You
Rush - Freewill
King's X - Freedom
Psychotic Waltz - Freedom?
Devo - Freedom Of Choice
~ Sailing to New Shores:
Vangelis/1492 Soundtrack - The Conquest of Paradise
Kansas - Distant Vision
Riot - Santa María
Schoolhouse Rock! No More Kings
Saxon - Sailing to America
A New world awaits...
Randy Newman - Sail Away
Promises to the slaves, but what good are promises when you are in chains.
Bob Catley - My America
Camel - Harbour of Tears (album)
Kansas - Song for America
A reminder of how it was, what we have done, and where can we take it.
~ Shades of Freedom
Avalon; "I Came To Baltimore On The 4th Of July"
Yes - America
Chicago - Saturday In The Park
The Nice - America (Instrumental)
Steve Hackett - Little America
Asia - Voice of America
Def Leppard - Hello America
Grand Funk - We're an American Band
Edgar Winter & White Trash - Back in the U.S.A.
Night Ranger - You Can Still Rock In America
Shok Paris - The American Dream
~ A Rallying Cry
Exmortus/Jadran "Conan" Gonzalez: guitar, David Rivera: guitar - Star Spangled Shredders
Styx - Miss America
Triumph - American Girls
Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers - American Girl
The Guess Who - American Woman
Gamma - Something In The Air
Queensrÿche - Anarchy-X / Revolution calling
The Beatles - Revolution
Megadeth - Lying In State
Andromeda - Stay Unaware
Anacrusis - Sound the Alarm
Nevermore - The Politics Of Ecstasy
Buffalo Springfield - Stop Children What's That Sound
Crosby, Stills & Nash - Long Time Gone
The Who - Baba O'Riley
Barry McGuire - Eve of Destruction
Gary Moore - Shape of Things
Kansas - Curtain of Iron
Rush - Heresy
~ Dissension in the Ranks & Disturbers of OUR Harmony
Eric Johnson - Star Spangled Banner
Steve Miller Band - Living in the USA live 1972
Pain Of Salvation - America
Headspace - Fall Of America
Architects - These Colours Don't Run
IQ - Harvest of Souls
Suspyre - Let Freedom Ring (The Heart of it all)
Megadeth - Post American World
Triumph - Too much thinking
Andromeda - Chosen By God
Rainbow - Freedom Fighter
Foreigner - At War With The World
Damn the Machine - Honor
Primus - American Life
Angra - Fireworks
VoiVod - Freedom
Testament - P.C.
Havok - F. P. C.
. . . The Black Shirts.
Wrathchild America - Surrounded by Idiots
Paradox - Suburban Riot Squad
Powermad - Blind Leading The Blind
Adrenaline Mob - Blind Leading the Blind
Forbidden - Parting of the Ways/Infinite
Earthside - Mob Mentality
Black Sabbath - The Mob Rules (Heavy Metal OST version)
Spock's Beard - Second Overture/4th Of July
Soundgarden - 4th of July
Queensrÿche - Chemical Youth (We Are Rebellion)
Fates Warning - Point of View
Toehider - This Conversation is Over
The Who - Won't Get Fooled Again Live
~ Nineteen Eighty Four
Oceania, Tis For Thee
1984; Two minutes hate/Oceania Anthem
Warlord - Beginning / Lucifer's Hammer
Warrior - PTM1 / Fighting For The Earth
Havok - Ingsoc
Queensrÿche - Speak
Judas Priest - Electric Eye
Death - 1,000 Eyes
Redemption - Leviathan Rising
Pink Floyd - Sheep
District 97 - Sheep
Kansas - Sparks of the Tempest
David Bowie - 1984
Muse - United States of Eurasia / Collateral Damage
Katagory V - Liberated Minds
Metallica - Escape
Rush - Witch Hunt
The Quiet Room - Two Minutes Hate
Queensrÿche - Resistance
Iced Earth - Resistance
Sepultura - Refuse/Resist
Forbidden - Wake Up!
~ We keep hangin' on . . .
Yngwie J. Malmsteen - Star Spangled Banner
Magnum - Only in America
Triumph - Stranger In A Strange Land
Queensryche - I'm American
Damn the Machine - On with the Dream
Rush - Territories
Enchant - The Great Divide
Ice Age - Perpetual Child
. . . for the children to find themselves
Magellan - Friends of America
Heart - Allies
John Farnham - You're the Voice
~ The Civil War:
Lincoln; “I am the President of the United States, clothed with immense power!”
James Horner - Glory OST; Charging Fort Wagner
Stryper - Battle Hymn Of The Republic (Glory, Glory, Hallelujah)
Iced Earth - The Devil To Pay
Poco - Blue and Grey (See order of tracks on the Audio Playlist)...
The New American Brass Band - Dixie / Bonnie Blue Flag
Iced Earth - Clear the Way (December 13th, 1862)
Iced Earth - Hold At All Costs (July 2, 1863)
Magellan - Another Burning
Glory; Charging Fort Wagner
Iced Earth - High Water Mark (July 3rd, 1863)
Mitch Miller and Chorus - When Johnny Comes Marching Home
Randy Edelman - Gettysburg OST; Reunion and Final
The Abyssinian Baptist Church Sanctuary Choir - Battle Hymn of the Republic
James Horner; Glory OST - Closing Credits
~ The 500 Nations Suite:
Native American Round Dance Music
Steve Walsh - Kansa(s)
Anthrax - Indians
Iron Maiden - Run To The Hills
Testament - Native Blood
Holocross - Warpath
Black Label Society - Crazy Horse
Steve Walsh - Glossolalia
Dances with Wolves; Buffalo Dance ("I see buffalo!")
Lalu - Tatonka
Amboy Dukes - The Great White Buffalo
Robbie Robertson - Ghost Dance
The Red Shadow Singers - Ghost Dance Song
Pallas - Ghostdancers
Iced Earth - Ghost Dance (Awaken the Ancestors)
Ghost Dance of Spotted Elk.
John Arch - Cheyenne
Kansas - Cheyenne Anthem
Thin Lizzy - Massacre
Riot - Holy Land
Dreamkeeper; "he wannabe connected"
Lakota - To Walk the Red Road
Slavior - Red Road
Robbie Robertson - It is a good day to die
Paul Revere And The Raiders - Indian Reservation (Cherokee People)
Man O War - Spirit Horse Of The Cherokee
Yngwie J. Malmsteen - Cherokee Warrior
Pain Of Salvation - Black Hills
Eric Johnson - Trail Of Tears
Testament - Trail of Tears
Steve Morse - The Great Mountain Spirit (Instrumental)
HIAWATHA AND THE PEACEMAKER By Robbie Robertson
Blackfoot - Indian World
Kansas - One Big Sky
Riot - The Last Of The Mohicans (metal theme)
Pain of Salvation - Pilgrim
~ Epilogue: For the pursuit...
Joe Satriani - Star Spangled Banner
The Pursuit . . .
Styx - Blue Collar Man (Long Nights)
Rush - Working Man
King's X - Working Man
Jethro Tull - Pussy Willow
The Police - Synchronicity II
Ayreon - Connect The Dots
"I wish I could . . . ."
Molly Hatchet - Dreams I'll Never See
Point Blank - On The Run
Styx - This Old Man
Neil Young - Old Man
Triumph - Ordinary Man
Lynyrd Skynyrd - Simple Man
Blackfoot - Diary of a Working Man
Metal Church - Anthem to the Estranged
The Pursuit Of Happyness; Chris gets the job :)
Rush - Something For Nothing
~ ... and Libertas
"Give me Liberty! . . .
Mark Isham - On the Threshold of Liberty (Instrumental)
Rush - Second Nature
Queensrÿche - Sign Of The Times
Cryptic Vision - Power To Mend
Pyramaze - A World Divided
Megadeth - A House Divided
She's above us all, here in the cheap seats . . .
Toehider - Whatever Makes you feel Superior
John Lennon - Instant Karma
Triumph - Stranger in a Strange Land
Kansas - No one together
Chicago - It Better end soon 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th Movement
Dream Theater - Illumination Theory
. . . Illuminated for us all
Sieges Even - Mounting Castles In The Blood Red Sky
Steve Hackett - Black Thunder
Kings X - King
U2 - (Pride) in the name of love
Bruce Springsteen - Born in the U.S.A. (Not a big Springsteen fan but its hard not to add this song . . .)
John Mellencamp - Pink Houses (Possibly the only hit by John I can stand :p )
Toxik - There stood the fence
Harry Nilsson - Dayton Ohio 1903
King's X - Picture
Styx - Half Penny, Two Penny/A.D. 1958
Kansas - Peaceful And Warm
Michael Hedges - Holiday
Red Skelton's Pledge of Allegiance (Spoken Word)
Jimi Hendrix - The Star Spangled Banner Live at Woodstock 1969
Team America One Man Metal Band - Fuck Yeah!
Cheech and Chong - Born in East LA
Roxanne - Go Fuck Yourself (Featuring dUg Pinnick & George Lynch)
Boston - Star Spangled Banner/4th Of July Reprise (National Anthem)
Rush - Peaceable Kingdom
Thunderclap Newman - Something In The Air
Canned Heat - Let's Work Together
John Lennon - Power to the People
Brotherhood of Man - United We Stand
Bruce Hornsby - The Way It Is
Chicago - Where Do We Go from Here
Don McLean - American Pie
Hot Hero - Get Together
Sly & The Family Stone - Everyday People
Kansas - Back Door
Pink Floyd - High Hopes
Styx - The Grand Final
*hidden tracks - I usually did this on my CD versions. I tracked-in long periods of silence (approx. 6 second tracks of silence that would fit on any given CD) to a hidden track as a surprise to the listener. Especially if listening on headphones.
Please remember, for our collective humanity:
UNITED we stand, DIVIDED we fall.
"To grow without is not to grow within, for in the promise is a victory, to see the way that everything should be
To feel the joy that we were meant to know, we should have realized so long ago!
We're all together, harmony will abound'. Look at each other, all that was lost is found
New situation if our direction's true, we're all together
. . . everyone is me and you".
- Kansas/"No one Together"
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